TOS Rewatch

You're probably right - but spread out over centuries and not just in Salem (for the American centric audience Trek was made for) it just seems strange they staid as long as they did or couldn't avoid most of those problems, given their advanced knowledge and ability, at least in groups, to get away. And more than a little weird they landed on Earth and only there from the center of the galaxy. I wonder what visitors other alien races had or how often that sort of thing happens in the Trek universe. Who visited the Andorians, for example? So much to know, so vast is space and time. Just lucky Earth ships keep finding the visitors that came to Earth long ago.

Once Upon a Planet


Upon a return visit to the shore leave planet, it quickly becomes apparent something is wrong – the place has become dangerous, despite their full knowledge of its intended function. They all get away and return to the ship, except Lt. Uhura, who is now missing. Now captain Kirk, Mr. Spock, Dr. McCoy, and Lt. Sulu must risk their lives to rescue her, while Mr. Scott finds the ship has new troubles of its own.

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Spoiler

Gazing at one's reflection while humming is apparently Uhura's idea of R&R, I guess, but to each their own.

Of course, Uhura may just be fascinated by why her Enterprise insignia and rank stripes aren't reflected on her uniform. I know that would fascinate me. I'm not sure I'd be humming after such a realization, but that's me. At any rate, YMMV.

I guess the planet's master computer found her thoughts the most interesting or something since of them all, it captured her.

Think about music.
Uh uh!


It would seem for thousands of years the master computer has been growing in power and sophistication, and now it wants something more. But why now?

Topside, the landing party discovers the caretaker has died, finding his marker that states this fact in multiple languages and that he was the last of his race, too. We did not ever get this impression before, but then he may not have wished them to know he was the last of his kind, and when he said "we," he might have meant him and the computer, or maybe there were a few others yet. We just don't know. At any rate, what an incredibly advanced race they must have been, and what a mystery that they just died out.


After avoiding dangers no one was really thinking about, like a two-headed fire-breathing dragon or a giant cat, they plan to get underground by fooling the system into thinking Spock is dying so it would take him below, just as it had for McCoy when the knight ran him through years before, hoping the planet's automatic functions were still active. It works, and Kirk also slips in, unfortunately leaving McCoy and Sulu behind to fend off hostile entities.

Below, they confront the machine who has been laboring under the misapprehension the Enterprise and other sky ships enslave its inhabitants – a familiar theme amongst carbon infestations – though Spock clears up the misunderstanding in short order. I guess Lt. Uhura couldn't make those misunderstandings clear herself, but Spock understands and communicates with machines better, so I'll let it go.

And while the computer felt enslaved before, now that it had a different perspective, it understands, and from that new POV, it found it could continue its service and learning and explore the galaxy by learning from space farers who stop in for R&R, all now without feeling enslaved.

So, you feel better now?


All is well, for now, and Captain Kirk orders shore leave to resume, though some have already jumped the gun.


I have to marvel at such technology, to create whole planets, read minds, and produce things like grand southern mansions in seconds, but with transporter and replicator tech, and more, I guess such things are possible. It just takes a massive amount of energy, and with free access to a nearby star, it's virtually free. It may be hard for us to grasp how an economy works in such a place, or why that alien culture built such a place for itself and for others, but I suppose it's possible.

Therefore, there's nothing too wrong in this episode, and I rather enjoyed it, just as I did the TOS: Shore Leave, though the original was slightly superior, and I certainly appreciate a call back to TOS without guking things up too badly. I'd say they did a good job here, so I gave it 7 out of 10.

Once Upon a Planet Transcript
http://www.chakoteya.net/StarTrek/TAS017.htm

 

And Ed Bishop made his one and only contribution to Trek in The Magicks of Megas-Tu!
JB

 

The Ambergris Element

Why not fly the shuttle above the creature's reach?

Affected their metabolism to change them into water-breathers? I do no think that word means what you think it means.

So the aquashuttle is the only Federation craft designed to go underwater. Definitely not the Enterprise.

Nice use of those force field belts. Shame we never got those in live action.

Universal translator works on writing, too.

That was another neat concept generally well told. I like the weird history of the aquans and how Kirk and Spock had to try to adjust to being underwater creatures. Nice symmetry how they decided to head back to land. And it was quite amusing to see Kirk and Spock fighting sea monsters.

The Slaver Weapon

Controlled the entire galaxy, eh?

Interesting to see TAS actively introducing a new enemy state. I find them nicely unique, though mildly reminiscent of the early Ferengi with the incompetence and misogyny. I do like the touch of them having telepaths which are easily identifiable by their misery. And that they fought four wars with humans and lost all of them.

The fifth setting absorbs energy, but conveniently not the energy of the Starfleet atmosphere belts.

'Remember to ZigZag'. Spock should've been in command at the Battle of the Bastards.

Interesting that the Slavers ruled the galaxy when 90% of their tech was no better than Federation standard. I assume at least their propulsion systems must've been a huge advancement.

Overall I like the addition of the Kzinti to the rogues gallery, though if they ever make it to live action I hope they make them a little more intelligent.


Eye of the Beholder

I really like the environment designs on this planet. Possibly one of the nicest planetary backdrops in the franchise.

Weird that they stole Godzilla's roar for a small vulcan wolf-thing, yet when they do actual giant monsters they just use generic noise.

And McCoy is trapped by a tail. Very dignified (though, really, he should be dead...)

Pink elephant snails on parade! That shot is too hilarious.

The zoo is a really neat element. I find it odd that the aliens act so simplistic and seemingly dull-witted considering they're supposed to be hyper evolved.

So, they were at Humanity's stage of evolution eons ago. I guess the Slavers didn't actually control all intelligent life in the galaxy.

'Two Parties, all human.' And Spock?

Overall a very fun episode, though Scott's ability to connect to the child was a bit too convenient.


Jihad

I like the idea of the Vedala - borderline Q, but still down in the regular plane of existence playing nice with the little people. I am, though, starting to think one of the animators on this show must've been obsessed with cats.

This is about the last kind of story I ever expected to see in Star Trek, but it actually seems to work really well. I like the idea of these representatives of unique races coming together to complete a quest that will prevent a devastating interstellar war.

Lara is a rather irritating character. What does it add to the story to have someone just constantly hitting on Kirk for no reason? And honestly, it would've been nice to have another alien in that spot instead of randomly choosing multiple humans while only picking one of each other race.

Lava flows at the speed of plot.

Those same dragons again. Its like theres some galactic conspiracy going on.

And there's a traitor - I guess that was predictable. Still, at least it wasn't the overly aggressive lizard man.

I really like the idea of the Skorr and how dangerous they could be if their culture ever shifted back. This is one of those old ideas that really could've been useful in, say, the Dominion War. I'd definitely be interested in seeing the Skorr again, although bird-people are pretty hard to do convincingly in live action. Fun episode overall.

 

On the subject of the center of the galaxy in "Magicks" being a place where creation is still occurring, it was an element of the Steady State theory of creation that the creation of matter be an ongoing process. The Steady State theory has been disproven, but the definitive evidence against it, the cosmic microwave background as well as quasars, was discovered about a decade before "Magicks" aired in 1973. The Steady State theory was still taught in public school science class in at least parts of the US throughout the whole 1970s as one of the possibilities (representing the lag between the cutting edge and what got filtered down into secondary-level textbooks).

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steady_State_theory
https://thesciencegeek.org/2015/07/25/the-steady-state-theory/

 

I don't believe the steady state theory proposed the center of the galaxy for anything, though the idea that matter was being continuously made (somewhere) was part of that. But it was widely discredited before this series by most, and was never really based on observational evidence so much as an esthetic desire (I think) for an "unchanging," infinite universe.

As to where or how long the steady state theory might have lingered in some old text books where some behind the times schools were still teaching it, I couldn't say. I do feel, however, using it at all, let alone the center of the galaxy, is a classic example of bad science fiction - good science fiction being something that extrapolates upon currently accepted or known facts at the time of the writing (apart from any foundational elements accepted as part of the premise of the series but that may be contrary to known facts). But I really don't want to get into that again here.

 

That's nice.

 

Aside from Yesteryear these are probably my four favourite TAS episodes.\

I can't understand why many people voted "The Ambergris Element" the second worst episode of the season. It had the aquashuttle, those convenient belts for going underwater. Absolutely love it - though I admit I haven't seen it in years.

I quite like the calm style of "The Slaver Weapon" without Kirk dominating - just for a change. Uhura and Sulu get a chance to shine, Spock uses his super smart brain to get them out of trouble. They make a great team.

 

Pirates of Orion

Spock is fatally ill from a cold. That's narratively convenient.

It seems odd that Spock would be so illogical regarding what he is capable of while ill.

Why are a freighter crew wearing starfleet uniforms?

Ore-ree-on? Who pushed this weird new pronunciation (and the completely different and frankly ugly visual design of these Orions)?

Yeah, I think this was the first episode in the series I would honestly consider bad (though not terrible). The format of this show works great for simple, wacky sci-fi concepts and that's mostly what it concentrated on throughout season 1. This episode tries to go back to a more TOS style bit of high stakes character drama, but it just doesn't work at all. The voicework/animation really isn't up to the challenge of constant, rising tension of that kind and the entire thing is horribly undercut by the utterly unimaginative (totally unrecognizable) Orions.



Bem

Wow this guy's annoying.

So how is this disassembled body model supposed to work?

Is that Nichelle Nichols' voice as the guardian of the planet?

Of course Spock would defend the trade of librarian.

So Bem is basically just looking for opportunity's to judge Kirk and by extension the Federation. And of course he falls short himself - yet, how does it even make sense for him to have been caught or to be at all introspective enough to realize that all of this was his fault to start with? Or, if he is a colony being made up of lots of creatures together, why is the idea of him doing away with this combination of himself (and presumably transforming into a different combination) treated like suicide? His story just doesn't work from start to finish.


The Practical Joker

Something familiar about that laugh... because it's Majel Barrett. Again.

Ok, if its supposed to be the computer, then I guess its not so bad this time.

Hey. Holodeck.

Nervous breakdown? Really? Ok, so they reversed the effects by going back through the energy field, so the nervous breakdown excuse was BS. That's a good thing.

This episode was ok, but nothing special. Majel came pretty close to a good impression of the Joker, though...


Albatross

Kirk and Spock are at the Hall of Justice. Will they meet Superman?

The aurora caused the plague and the computer knows about it but was confused by the color changing systems? This line of logic makes no sense.

That is unquestionably the most bizarre end of episode jokey moment in Trek history.

This was a better episode overall. Definitely a better attempt at the more character driven drama style, though the format is still too limiting to really allow it to shine.



How Sharper than a Serpent's Tooth

A Comanche ensign. That's neat.

'Where did it come from?' They ask in wonder 2 episodes after playing in the holodeck...

An interesting sci-fi explanation for the whole pyramid conspiracy: they were all only using part of the knowledge provided by the alien.

How do you inject an animal surrounding by a deadly electric field?

Vulcan was visited by aliens in the past and taught the aliens better wisdom. Of course it was.

I like the story of Kukulkan overall. A lonely guy who just wants to help humans reach their potential. A good episode.



The Counter-Clock Incident

I like the black stars on white background look.

How come the Enterprise crew can converse normally in the other universe when the other captain was still speaking backward in the regular universe?

Why are they de-aging so quickly? Just because time moves backwards doesn't mean days equal decades.

Well, April is right about not automatically wanting to live life all over again. Even so, no way I would go back into that transporter just to make my body feeble and old again. You can live a whole new life, or just enjoy retirement without the physical pains and problems that usually come with it. But a fun episode overall.



So that's all of TAS. It was much beter and more fun than I expected, even though there was only one episode that I really loved, and I still don't care for the animation, much of the voicework or any of the music. Season 2 was definitely inferior to season 1, though, how could it not be with less than half as many episodes? Even so, Pirates of Orion and Bem are definitely the worst of the series, by far, which is hard to ignore when they literally make up a third of the season. Overall there are a lot of great ideas in this series and I would actually love to see some of them make their way into the other live action shows someday.

 

Mudd's Passion


Harry Mudd's back and up to his old tricks – and some new ones - since this time what he's peddling actually works, though with unexpected aftereffects. Will Love rule the day, or will Kirk and Spock fall victim to Love's dangers?

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Spoiler

Wow, Lt. M'Ress actually mentions transporter room 4. After much debate, I'm pretty sure TOS never explicitly said there was more than one transporter room, though I think it was implied. After all, the sets did change in appearance and apparently location and/or possibly which deck the transporter room was on from time to time, but this is the first time something "canon" (if TAS is accepted as such) explicitly mentioned more than 1 transporter room. I suspect they may have even more than four, not even counting the larger emergency evacuation ones or the ones used almost exclusively for mass cargo transport. But it's nice to finally hear it (though I still can't find a scene with a sign designating more than one I could have sworn I once saw somewhere).

You're not foolin' anyone, ya great lump.


O.K. Spock being more precise again than maybe he ought to be (without any demonstrable reason given), and then we're treated to a worse rehash of Mudd's euphemisms for various criminal behavior, followed by a blatant use of power to fend off a crowd's righteous anger while they encourage Mudd to surrender himself into their custody since they didn't have legal authority to arrest him outside their jurisdiction. And an arrest report – Kirk did once mention they were the only policemen in the area, but this is hitting the nail on the head. I guess they would have that function – but still, they clearly went after a man not in their jurisdiction. I guess they take a pretty dim view of anyone selling Starfleet Academy.

How the hell does Lt. Arex sit down on those bridge chairs, anyway? O.K. it seems he has two right hands and one left one (judging from the opposable thumbs in this episode) though maybe he's double-jointed or something.

Now why Spock and Kirk seem affected when they were off the ship is a bit of a mystery. Maybe they had been breathing the love gas for a time before they beamed down.

Tell me, my love, my Christian, why would a chemical you put on yourself have such a profound effect on somebody you simply touch?


You think too much, Spock. Just sit back and enjoy the lap dance.


Oh, it doesn't matter why a nurse is wearing a phaser – only that you're here with me.


McCoy is a little cheesy, but he's probably not wrong about having saved most everyone on the ship on one occasion or another.

That is an outstandingly stupid idea! Umm. I mean, I doubt we can appeal to their better nature.

Makes you think what Spock really thinks about most of Kirk's ideas, but never says, eh? Too bad we weren't treated to what Kirk and Spock said to each other after the love effects wore off and hatred took over. Or maybe, being wise, they just avoided one another for a time and sulked in their separate tents.

I'm sorry about that name I called you yesterday.

What name? I didn't hear you call me a name.

Oh, you weren't there at the time.


I'd say assuming the giant beast would gently touch him and the effect would be instantaneous was an outstandingly stupid thing to do. He should have been crushed to death by one swipe of that beast's claws – not that it might not have felt bad about it later on, but Kirk would still be dead.

Take that, my love.


You treated me badly, but I love you so much I'll still defend you from that beast.
Back off! He's mine, I tell you.


And so Harry Mudd gets rehabilitation therapy - again. Theft of a shuttle craft, kidnapping, escaping custody, all pale in light of the fact he helped get out of the trouble he put them in, maybe, or that he didn't use the phaser they actually let him have on them – or the Feds are just a bunch of ol' softies when it comes to not punishing people too harshly, being so enlightened and all.

It's a fair cop, but society is to blame.
Agreed.

This rehabilitation therapy is not particularly effective, is it? But, as Harry says, nothing in this universe is perfect. This episode sure wasn't.

Nonsense. I'm a changed man. Can't you see that for yourself?


Still, it wasn't that bad, either. Better than Mudd's Women, but not nearly as good as I, Mudd, I'll give it a 4 out of 10. I didn't care for the idea that nobody really had a problem with using drugs to encourage other's of the opposite sex to do things they normally wouldn't – only that they didn't think it worked. I'm pretty sure many wouldn't mind it only worked – briefly – since that might be more than time enough to have a sexual conquest and be gone, leaving bitter dregs.

Ohhhhh Ohhhh Ohhh Ohhhhhh, bitter dregs.

Mudd's Passion Transcript
http://www.chakoteya.net/StarTrek/TAS008.htm

 

Harry Mudd! Even the name seems like an insult!
JB

 

The Terratin Incident


An outdated code in a radio signal prompts Captain Kirk to investigate, but it isn't just McCoy's interest in such things that are shrinking by the minute – so is the entire crew growing smaller and smaller. Before long, they won't even be able to operate the ship's controls, and that will spell the end of them all. Can Captain Kirk figure out what's wrong before then and save his crew in time? The odds are vanishingly small.

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Xenylon, the algae-based material from which starfleet uniforms are made, is finally revealed. I KNEW IT! Well, O.K., I thought they were replicated and quite disposable rather than washable, but maybe not. Or maybe xenylon somehow provides the right material in bulk for the replicators to "print" the uniforms and they can be easily recycled rather than laundered. However you cut it, it's something to think about it.

And actual lab animals. Nice.


I like they knit bones, though a laser doesn't sound right for that job, and a compound fracture is one where the bone is sticking through the skin, so I think it's a more serious problem than they let on – or McCoy doesn't know "compound" doesn't just sound cool, but actually means something medically specific. Odd, the tiny device Christine Chapel retrieved didn't seem to look anything like the device they used to knit the bones.

Isn't this device different from the one the nurse almost drowned while retrieving?
I think you're right. Maybe it was just the battery for this big honker.


But somebody does knitting in Sickbay, or sewing, a normally sutureless place, so Kirk could luckily have what it took to recue the drowning nurse. Who would have thought she couldn't swim a stroke?

Ohhh, that sinking sensation.


And I thought the place was cleaner than that, too, with a toothpick just laying on the floor. I guess the bridge's Rumba hasn't been through there, lately. Nice – they show the electric eye for the automated doors. I KNEW IT!

But now everybody is shrinking, but only organic matter, as the space between organic molecules closes up. Thank goodness they can still breath the normal sized inorganic oxygen and nitrogen gas molecules in the air. At least in DS9: One Little Ship, they mentioned the air inside their shuttle/runabout shrank, too, and the air outside the runabout would be unbreathable, IIRC.

Runabout to normal sized control panel, runabout to normal sized control panel, come in please.


Apart from some old Land of the Giants set pieces, all we had to really make was this overly large communicator. Ha ha. Oh, yeah. This is a cartoon.


My rank is equal to yours, captain, and I forbid you to destroy us.


Yeah, that's up to you to decide. You could have gone about this better, but O.K.

You ever try to tie strings to actual buttons or knobs or switches – it is not that easy unless you drill holes in them or something. Anyway . . .


I was actually less offended by this transporter solution since it didn't really reset to an old pattern, as suggested, but simply put the molecules back in their normal orientation and spacing, as it normally would, since they didn't actually change size or mass. However, the Terratins had and still have transporters of their own, so why their ancestors didn't use them to correct the problem is a bit of a mystery. Or maybe it was just pointless since the spiroid waves were constant and without escaping them, they would ultimately shrink to the smallest size before their DNA coiled up as tight as it could. Too bad the current generation's condition is now normal for them. I'm not sure why, but it matters . . . little.

But then the turd in the punch bowl – they begin to communicate like it was never really a problem before, so the mystery was pointless, the threats were pointless, most everything seemed pointless.

Ultimately, I like they were shrinking, science aside, and moving about the ship, but the basis for this was just not well conceived, IMO.

Fun, but an outstandingly stupid idea – ummm, I mean, it would probably be well received . . . by children on Saturday morning.

And doubtless they wouldn't be thinking what I'm thinking.


Ah, the city of Kandor. No. This is Terratin – you know, Terra Ten. Because we're from Terra and it's the tenth, well, something or another, and while we speak perfect English, we did sort of pervert the pronunciation on that one.


We of the Sevateem tribe understand completely. It could happen to anyone.


So while I enjoyed the episode, it has some pretty fatal flaws for me to rate it higher than 5 out of 10.

The Terratin Incident Transcript
http://www.chakoteya.net/StarTrek/TAS015.htm

 

That was actually my favorite of this series.

Yeah, the science doesn't hold up, but I treat it like Ant-Man and enjoy it anyway. The only thing that bothered me in the end was the communication issues.

 

The Time Trap


Trapped inside a pocket universe with the Klingons, Captain Kirk and the Enterprise only have days to make their escape, but they can only manage it with the help of the Klingons – and Captain Kor has no intention of allowing the Enterprise to escape destruction at his hands a second time.

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You gotta love a 2D triangle in 3D space. The story idea was quite intelligent, but the author inexperienced, with a pattern representing two dimensional writing. Nothing quite like two dimensional thinking in space. Maybe it should have been the Delta Pyramid.

Three Klingon ships vs. one Federation Constitution Class Starship, again. Mouse Trap. Those Klingons know what it takes to outmatch the Feds.

While I normally hate it when Kirk's intuition is almost as if he's read ahead in the script and does something that for all he knows could lead to his destruction, after taking hits from the Klothos and being trapped by two more Klingon Battle Cruisers, sticking around would have been certain death or capture (and he's not allowed to let his ship fall into enemy hands), so he really had no choice but to take that gamble – and it paid off. So he dives headfirst into the area where the Klothos had just disappeared. Besides, he has orders to solve this mystery, too, so in they go.

And wow, a Sargasso sea in space – a place of awe and mystery – a ship's graveyard holding the answers to countless mysteries.

And one of those was this little beauty.


Too bad it doesn't exactly follow current canon, but back in 73, it was impressive and I loved it. You couldn't really tell what that warp 2.5 capable starship was like in this episode, but others have knocked out a few images.


I mean, if you like that sort of thing. And I do.


So, enforced peace by the council of Elysia in their pocket universe, and representatives of many alien races.

Orion, Vulcan/Romulan (depends on who you ask, but it's not clear in the episode), Andorian, Tellarite, Gorn, Phylosian, Kzinti, Humand and Klingon, too, and maybe others.

We've done a lot with limited resources, but it's best not to question us as to the details.


I had actually forgotten there was yet another Orion Slave Girl dance and not just the 3 I recalled. Of course I also didn't notice she was green (being colorblind as I am, so I didn't make the connection then). And it was hardly memorable since it was only a frame or two.

Ta-Da.


Seriously, this thing just annoys me. In a cartoon you can recreate anything, so how hard could it have been to duplicate this as a wonderful callback without being overbearing?


But nope – they draw something new.


Too bad. I'd have given this +1 more just for a decent call back like that, and I think others would have, too.


I don't mind Spock acting this way, though I think he would have looped the captain in quicker than that. And for all of it, he didn't really uncover the bomb – an Elysian Psychic had to warn them despite all their security and advanced warning.

Logic is a little tweeting bird chirping in a meadow. Logic is a wreath of pretty flowers, which smell BAD.
What?


So, obviously, with better tech than any who had come before, and through clever use of more power than normal, and holding together in an advanced warp bubble, they could escape – and Kor's plans were foiled again. Thankfully, the two other ships were no longer waiting, and so off goes the Enterprise, free and clear to navigate to their next adventure.

Pity. Their destruction would have been glorious.


I liked the story. It has problems, and using magic or psionics to make it work, but so does TOS. Voyager will also delve into a similar pocket universe, IIRC, in Star Trek: Voyager - Elite Force. But I did like it - never before seen ships, a call back or two to other races, and some yet to come, a pocket universe where time runs differently, treacherous Klingons, cooperation, and ultimately victory while foiling the enemy's plans and solving the great mystery. Oh yeah, and a scantily clad dancing babe. Apart from reused Klingon footage, I liked most of it. I give this on an 8 out of 10. Simple - but good.

The Time Trap Transcript
http://www.chakoteya.net/StarTrek/TAS010.htm

 

The Ambergris Element


Long ago the world of Argo became mostly aquatic due to seismic disturbances, and by studying Argo, the crew of the Enterprise hope to learn many lessons that can help Federation planets facing similar transformations. But when attacked by a giant sea creature, Kirk and Spock are lost for five days. Persistance from their friends pays off when they are eventually found, but something has transformed them into water breathing individuals. More than anything they wish to discover the means to change back, but the indigenous population of sea dwellers distrust the air breathers and will not help - most of them, anyway. Now a gigantic seaquake will soon hit the area. Can they find the answers they need in time?

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The aqua shuttle, which shall remain nameless, is a pretty sleek submersible craft, and it's even equipped with phasers (and I'm pretty sure some impressive inertial dampeners, too). Though it had no trouble flying down to the surface, when phasers are knocked out, they seem to forget they can fly away from the sea serpent, not to mention they could have done that before fighting in the first place. Foolish to have phasers and not use them, eh?

Mmmmm, the meaty bits are inside the hard shell.


Tossed around like a toy, the craft is destroyed and Kirk and Spock are separated from the others. When Kirk and Spock are found five days later, they can't breath air. Lucky they found them just in time.


So back on board the Enterprise, Kirk and Spock survive inside a large tank of water, though Jim feels he can't do his job from inside a water tank because everybody knows being a starship captain is a tankless job, but somebody's got to do it, and since the aquashuttle was destroyed, only the captain and his first officer can search the sea for a cure, so they prepare to disembark from a surface only shuttle. Ummm, let's call it a boat.

These water helmets work great. Guess we weren't confined to that tank.


What they find, however, is they are not welcome by the locals.

That's another catch by me for a net gain of two, Arrggghhh.


Distrusted, and accused of being spies, like evil air breathers are well known to be according the ordainments, they are staked out on land under a net and left to suffocate. Except one disagrees with this punishment and helps free them by getting their friends, and with the help of Mr. Scott they are soon free. And the ever handy force field belt works under water, too. Isn't that great?

Seriously, shouldn't we always be wearing these in space ships and water craft and, well, everywhere? In fact, we could fill them with water as well as air and you water dwellers could use them to walk the surface, too. Damn, son, these are handy.


The ordainments are fine turning air breathers into water breathers, but not the other way around since, well, you know – air breathers are evil. Still, some hip youngsters and some young hipsters don't care to rely too much on the ancient ordainments, and they will help guide them to the ancient records that might have the reverse processed recorded.

Things proceed swimmingly.


It's so well preserved despite the devastating earthquakes.


And the illumination is ample this far under water, and surface records are undamaged in all these centuries, and in the first place we looked, too. Good thing their medical symbols and ours look so similar. Well, I'm convinced these are the right records, so without looking, let's take them and go back to the ship.


And now they must obtain sea serpent venom to make the potion to reverse the process. That poor serpent is really having a hard time since the Feds showed up.

Still, they only got a little venom, but will it make enough for both Kirk and Spock? Ummm, yep. Though I must have misunderstood since it seemed they used it all on Kirk, or more on Kirk than they had left for Spock. And yet he was cured, too.

And now, thinking quickly, Kirk uses the ship's phasers through all that water to adjust seismic pressures in the ocean floor and redirect the quake to unpopulated polar areas. The sea city is saved, and their thankful leaders visit the ship and marvel at their technology and such.

Incredible. Simply incredible. And you violate your prime directive like this any time you feel like it?


Vulcanian Frustration.


And they scoffed at MY movie.


The kicker for me here is they claim to have learned a lot about how to use phasers to redirect quakes, and that will be of great benefit to other Federation worlds, yet as far as I can tell, they must have known how to do that pretty well beforehand since Kirk just did it off the cuff or from the hip. E Z P Z.

I guess the best part is though some young hipsters decide to become air breathers and repopulate the newly appearing surface areas, the message is to not lose communications with one another, lest you make the same mistakes that were made in the past and grow to distrust and hate one another. But they made it an ordainment instead of a reason, so . . .

I like the new crafts, and learning the belt shields work underwater, too, and this isn't a horrible story, unless you look too closely at the elements and bad science. But for kids, I'm sure it's fine. I am not a kid, however. Not anymore. I wouldn't rate this too highly for the problems it has, but must rate it high enough since it's enjoyable enough to watch. 5 out of 10.

The Ambergris Element Transcript
http://www.chakoteya.net/StarTrek/TAS013.htm

 

The woman in white - two theories - 1) She's from Starfleet Medical (White medical uniform a la the Kelvin) 2) She's from Kirk's future (the white casual uniforms from TMP)

 

There is no indication she's from the future, though it was suggested to me somewhere she was a human from Starfleet, or at least Earth, some time past - maybe even from the Bonaventure, which would be pretty cool.

The Slaver Weapon


While transporting an incredibly rare and ancient stasis box to starbase 25, Spock, Sulu, and Uhura detect yet another rare stasis box. Almost unbelievable luck, Spock estimates the value to the Federation to be incalculable and decides to investigate – but it's a well-laid trap by some Kzinti agents – pretending to be mere pirates in case they are caught or killed so their government can disavow any knowledge of their actions. The large cat-like aliens open the box and discover a weapon with many settings on it, one of which promises to hold the key to the domination of known space and the downfall of the Federation of Planets. Can Spock and his team escape, or more importantly, can they recover the ancient weapon and prevent the enslavement of the entire galaxy?

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Spoiler

This is an excellent adaptation of part of Larry Niven's work, and the Kzinti race of warrior cat people was incorporated, as well as the ancient Slaver race that ruled the galaxy billions of years ago.

And we looked liked this – ha ha.


And I think it was well done that the Kzinit was one of the first races humans came across, and we immediately had 4 wars with them, and we won every time since the Kzinti have an unfortunate tendency to attack before they are really well prepared. And now a treaty deprives the entire race of any energy weapons (except for their police force) since it's for their own good and they almost certainly would otherwise try to go to war with us again. Even now, they're still trying.

It's always a mystery to me when they speak of galactic wide stuff since the Federation barely knows about the Alpha Quadrant, so what's happening now but in another quadrant, let alone what happened in the past for quadrants they've yet to reach and explore, should be a complete mystery to them. I just assume they mean "known Federation space" when speaking so casually about "galactic-wide" phenomenon since they couldn't possibly know about the other places yet. As such, billions of years ago, it would appear a race, we now call the Slavers, ruled most of known space and enslaved all other intelligent races, and it would appear during a revolt, rather than accept defeat, they wiped out most sapient life and even died off themselves, so the galaxy had to wait for more intelligent life and civilizations to arise anew. It's a fascinating concept. We wouldn’t know any of this, except these Slavers left behind a curious technology called Stasis boxes, wherein time itself stands still, and we have surmised much from their contents. Actually, for what they used it for it didn't sound all that useful, but I guess even hard tech can otherwise degrade over the years, so it, or fresh meat, could be stored and unaffected by eons of passing time.

Spock even mentions a "flying belt" was discovered in such a box, and it became the basis of artificial gravity used on starships, though he doesn't say Federation ships, or when, or who discovered it, so it may actually have been opened hundreds or even thousands of years ago and that technology has been passed around the galaxy for quite some time now.

So Spock and his team were captured and placed inside a Police Web, a device that holds them in place.
(It also melts snow and ice, so it's ideal for clearing walkways).


And it's funny how they try to thwart the Kzin telepath, who are well known as unhappy and neurotic.

Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering, and it's all over much too soon.


In this story, a weapon of some kind was stored in the stasis box, and with many settings, each mutating the form of the weapon to a new tool or device. But most of those settings were inferior in utility to current technology, except two. The first of those was a total matter conversion beam. I won't pretend to understand how it goes about unlocking the inherent energy of ordinary matter and converting 100% of it to pure energy – since it's almost like projecting anti-matter a good distance away without needing a source of anti-matter. More powerful than nuclear weapons or 10,000 cobalt bombs, in the hands of a spy they could locate critical areas or complexes behind enemy lines and utterly destroy them at a safe distance, hopelessly crippling the enemy and their industrial complex or other vital operations, then move on to do even more damage.

Most of the other devices seemed useful for a spy, hiding, gathering information, covert stuff like that, and so Sulu concluded it was a spy's tool and not a soldier's weapon.

I hate it when they test weapons on us.


The other useful device was an intelligent, reasoning computer in a small, handheld device. And since it was off and didn't know how long, or who had it now, but only that they weren't cleared to have the device, it tricked them into using the self-destruct setting.

So this is the total conversion beam, eh?


Ohhh, that had to hurt.

One of the few times on Trek the enemies were actually killed.

Anyway, though it's almost hard to divorce this episode from fond memories of Niven's Tales of Known Space and other works, I think it does a good job (not as good as Niven's original work here). It uses the ideas well, like the Slavers and the Kzinti, and their traits, and builds around three regular cast characters of Trek. It's good.

Kirk isn't even mentioned, so that's pretty rare, and the Enterprise isn't around either – just one of its shuttlecrafts, and of a sleeker design than before. The Kzin ship was pink – another colorblind mistake, but I never noticed that or would think it was such a bad thing.


You'll just have to trust me; it's not an ideal color for a vessel.


Nevertheless, this was well done, an excellent adaptation, a good story, and fun. Apart from the energy sapping device taking down the police net but leaving their life support belts unaffected, I can't say there were any serious problems with it, and since I enjoyed it, I'm giving it at least a 7, probably an 8 out of 10.

The Slaver Weapon Transcript
http://www.chakoteya.net/StarTrek/TAS011.htm

 

They spoke of time in eons, and tens of thousands of years, which is millions of years, so geologic time, but the Slavers were from billions of years ago, far longer ago and on an astronomical scale.

One just tires of the generic sounds or obvious reuse of the same voices for countless characters from limited actors, too.

While they were hyper evolved, they were so far above us they didn't think we were "intelligent" enough to have such "rights" to consider and therefore didn't really give it an honest look. But like kids fascinated by an anthill, they give it a much closer look than most adults can be bothered with. In any event, after they did look more closely they smartened up and let us go.

And Spock? I dunno – he's "human" enough to count, I guess, or "humanoid" culturally equates to "human" as a generic term by then, though what in the hell he means by this place was "manufactured – not created" – is a slight mystery to me. I mean I suspect he means it is not a natural occurrence, but what an odd way of putting it.

Eye of the Beholder


An entire crew has gone missing, their science ship abandoned in orbit of Lactra VII, so it falls to Captain Kirk and the crew of the Enterprise to discover what happened to them and rescue them if possible. But what happened to the science team might happen to them, too, so it's a risk, yet Jim knows better than most that's part of the job, and so Kirk, Spock, and McCoy brave the unknown together once again, but this time what they'll find is millions of years beyond them.

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Spoiler

Another zoo story, another menagerie – though to be fair, it was from 1973 so it came before some others – most recently The Orville's Command Performance, for example. The message? We do it to animals we feel we are more evolved than, so it's only fair if those more evolved than we are do it to us? And . . . therefore . . . zoos are kind of bad?

And the "original three?" whom you probably should have mention by name, you were just too late? For what? How did they die? Insect bite? I didn't like they glided over this a bit too easily, but, well, they can mourn their loss later, I guess.

And the 4th is on the verge. What'll we do?


Is that the main impression everyone has of McCoy – he's just around to insult and badger Spock and appear to be a bit of a racist? The guy seems perpetually annoyed with Spock, so any chance he gets to needle him, he takes. I don't think so, and I'll just chalk it up to either not having enough time to do something more involved, or not understanding Dr. McCoy that well. He is often poorly written in TAS.

This place is so beautiful. And the communicator signal is only 98.5 kilometers away, so let's walk there.

But Jim, that could take us about 15 hours to get there.

Indeed. Can't we transport there, captain?

No, we can't. We'd miss all this impossible scenery and the exciting wandering monsters.


I wouldn't have minded missing be captured like this, I can tell you that.

Shut up, Bones.


At least these creatures are easily animated, so we can concentrate on the story.


You mean that this is a zoo and we are merely specimens for an advanced race?


That's right, and we can convince them to give us a medical pouch so I can heal the 4th, and so maybe a communicator, too, and we can trick them. Good thing they only read our minds when we're not planning these deceptions.


Got you, you little bugger. Or do you have me?


The wee beastie was just a little curious, that's all, but half a case of scotch later, and he became far more talkative and now we're the best of friends.


Well, they're so advanced we're not ready for them, but they did invite us back, like the Metrons did.

And you're still not ready for us, though you might perhaps be suitable for an exhibit in a zoo, provided you don't fling feces at us.

Because that would be uncivilized?

No, because it's a bitch getting this gown dry cleaned.


So tell me, captain. How much trouble am I in for abandoning my ship?

You'll be broken, sir, and relieved of your command, and never given another command opportunity in Starfleet again. What you did was inexcusable.


If only I were guilty of theft, kidnapping, and fraud on a galactic scale like Harry Mudd, they would have gone easier on me.


But seriously, I'm not jazzed by this episode. There's nothing horribly wrong in it, though it does seem a little preposterous aliens so advanced would not recognize sapient life and choose not to include them in their zoos when they are capable of communicating that, or that they have difficulty communicating with intelligent creatures if they are that advanced. Luckily Scotty gets on with kids who have high aptitudes for engineering, so they got the message. Unless, of course, they do but they just don't care – but since they let them go at the end, they seemed to care, so it does seem unlikely. Maybe somebody sould give them a universal translator.

I won't rate the episode that highly, but I can't really fault it that much either, so I'll give it a middle of the road 5 out of 10.

Eye of the Beholder Transcript
http://www.chakoteya.net/StarTrek/TAS016.htm

 

I think Kor couldn't take the risk that Kirk would tell all his friends at Star Fleet Headquarters about the new pink Klingon uniforms and their sweetly permed hair, so he sabotaged The Enterprise so it could never get back to this reality! That's probably why the next time we see them (TMP) they've shaved their heads and are wearing combat gear resembling space conquistadors!
JB

 

Those weren't supposed to be representatives of various races – but specific skill sets. It is the way one puts together a well-balanced adventuring party, after all.

Larry Niven's Kzinti were well established before this, so they can't count toward another person's obsession with cats.

Hitting on Kirk a lot might be viewed as, Ha, how do you like it, or provocation to think about role reversal, so not everything in a story has to directly comment on the main theme.

Yeah, the flying dragons again, but this time they're mechanical.

I'm not sure what it is about the Skorr that makes them breed that fast – biological or technological or both, but I'd have to guess the latter. I would say the idea was used since the Jem'Hadar seemed to be a clone race, as did the Weyouns. One might think if the Federation had a clone species in their midst that were potentially war-like, they would have unleashed the Kraken on the Dominion, so to speak, but they didn't.

The Jihad


Interstellar war on a vast scale threatens Federation space, and only a team of specialists have a hope of stopping it before it starts. Kirk and Spock join other specialists in this undertaking, for they agree a galactic-wide Jihad would be disastrous for everybody. Can this elite team of adventuring heroes succeed where others have already failed? Worse, does every member of that team even want them to succeed?

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Spoiler

I loved the idea of putting together a team of elite specialists, a band of adventurers or heroes, and going on a quest where the stakes are life or death. Even back in 73 before my days of Dungeons & Dragons made this idea almost commonplace for me, I was already hooked on the concept. But it's not exactly new - I can think of a dirty dozen or so similar stories - so the question becomes, will they do it well?

They did.


I guess you're all wondering why you were drawn here like this.

Isn't it because reusing these ships from previous episodes saves money?

Well, yes, but also there is a quest to be undertaken.


These Vedala are almost scary – the oldest known space faring race, they seem to have a handle on the manipulation of time, space, and access to an incredible font of knowledge. But they have limits and don't know everything and can't do everything on their own, so while almost god-like, unlike some others, they fall below that line, which is appreciated. Toss a god into the mix and you have no one to blame for Deus Ex Machina endings but yourself.


I'm not sure I like the idea they play with our memories, too, or erase them so people forget potentially dangerous and sensitive information.

Ah, you're like Aleek Om, a member of the Aurelian race?

No, I am a member of the Skorr race. We are nothing like the Aurelians.


Are you sure?


You go to so many planets and see human-like species on practically everyone, and yet two similar looking avian species throws you for a loop?


Never mind that – you're smokin' hot, Kirky, and I fancy you. How about making some green memories with me?


Good lord, do I come off anything like that?


Anyway, you remind me of somebody I already know.

Who?


It's not important. Anyway, sorry, Lara, but we have more important things to do than engage in lust driven, unprotected sex (common meaning of "green memories," I guess) like find this Multiple Mobius Strip, Christmas Bow-Like structure that holds the soul of a great leader of the Skorr people – a war-like race – and prevent a galactic wide Jihad.


Ah, you mean like Surak's katra housed in an katric ark, a great man of peace who showed a war-like Vulcan race the ways of peace?

It's nothing like that! Surak was cool.


Ugh, I hate the way TAS animates running women. And even if they are mechanical this time, you gotta stop using those same flying dragons or whatever they are.

Ummmm, in case anyone cares, I object to being treated like a tool, Kirk.

Too bad, we need your skills, so the muscle will carry you. That's HIS job.


Ha ha, I was the traitor all along. And now I'll give you the opportunity to fight me in an zero-g environment since though killing you outright would guarantee my plans, just killing you with phasers would be . . . umm . . . too easy? Mawahhahhahhaa.


When did you last train in null gravity combat, Spock?

Last week, with you.

Just checking, since it's important I know you haven't have any other zero-g practice in the last 6 days.

What?


So a mad "man" not caring for the billions who would die but only concerned for his personal glory and restoration of the old ways before the path of peace was defeated.

That's Putin an unrealistic spin on it, don't you think?


Anyway, despite some now obvious flaws, I really did like this story. I liked the idea, I could see the insane motive better than most other insane mad men's motives, it makes sense to try to stop it like this, and I liked most of the characters – even Lara since she did take no for an answer.

I'm not sure why Tchar didn't just destroy the Soul, but maybe it's indestructible to any means available to him, so let's assume that.

I'll give this a 7 out of 10. A strong finish for the first TAS season.

The Jihad Transcript
http://www.chakoteya.net/StarTrek/TAS014.htm

 

The Pirates of Orion


Spock contracts a deadly disease and Kirk and McCoy have 3 days to obtain the necessary drug for a cure, but its closest source – 4 days' distance. A rendezvous will work, however, and the Enterprise races against the clock to make it there in time, but when they get there they discover some pirates have stolen the drug along with the freighter's entire shipment of dilithium. Time is almost out for Spock. Can Kirk locate the pirates and reacquire the drug in time, or will Jim lose his friend and the finest first officer in the fleet?

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Spoiler

There's a disease running through the ship – not too bad for humans but fatal to Vulcans – and yet nobody thought to quarantine the Vulcan. Is McCoy stupid or what? And why call a disease "fatal" if there is a known cure?

Arrrhhhh.


Holy crap! Sickbay, emergency, come in, sickbay.

I'm standing right here, Jim.

Oh yeah.


Rushing to get the drug there in time, the faster, more powerful starship, Potemkin, puts it on a slow, more vulnerable freighter.

Captain, why are we wearing starfleet uniforms?

We're operated by starfleet, so technically we're part of the organization.


O.K., but why didn't the Potemkin take the urgently needed drug directly to the Enterprise, saving precious time, instead of dumping the job on us, a much slower vessel?

Ever since the M5 incident, the Potempkin doesn't want to get anywhere near the Enterprise.


Ha ha, we caught up to you. Give us the drug and we'll let you go and not say anything about your piracy.

That's an incredible deal, but we can't trust you. How about a face-to-face exchange on the asteroid below?

Very well.


Since we can't trust them, we have to destroy them, and we can only do that by destroying us both. You good with that?

Of course. I mean it may seem like the crew shouldn't be, but most non-Orions don't understand what will happen to us, our families, and our loved ones if we don't. We'll be killed anyway, horribly, and our family and loved ones, too.

I knew there was a reason we Orions so willingly killed ourselves to keep our indiscretions hidden. Prepare the dilithium powered bomb.


Thanks for taking your finger off the button and letting me close the distance with you.

Your temerity startled me.


But now we got you, the drug, and Scott's got your dilithium crystals from your bomb, so you're finished.


Ah, but in a call back to TOS, I must remind you all failed Orion missions end in suicide, so you're S.O.L.


Nope, we stopped you again. Your uniform and makeup to fool us into believing you're not a green Ore-Eon didn't help you at all. And it didn't help your cause when you stopped to tell us you were going to commit suicide.

Damn your temerity and my stupidity – it gets me every time. Guess the jigs up so there's no use in my crew dying. That's it for O-Rye-On and our pretense of neutrality.


Ore-Eon, you mean.

No. O-Rye-On. TOS may have had a pronunciation guide on its scripts and TAS did not, but somebody should have remembered. Get with the program, already.


Look, the take-away here is your non human nature almost killed you, thus proving my racist assertion humans are superior.

No, the take-away is your ineptitude at properly alerting crewmen to potentially lethal contagious diseases you're suppose to know about demonstrates you're a poor doctor.

Shut up, Spock. Doctor's orders.


You know, I doubt asteroids would hang that close together without gravitationally clumping up. So it seems pretty unrealistic, as does several other aspects of this story. I can't say I like it, but I think it could have been done better with the same basic idea, so again I'll give it a 5 out of 10 for average. It's not a promising start to season 2, and it never bodes well when the care put into something like this seems slip shod, as the changes from TOS to TAS suggest.

The Pirates of Orion Transcript
http://www.chakoteya.net/StarTrek/TAS020.htm