I like this. Let's work together.
As for me, I'd hire Ron Moore just so could have the pleasure of firing him while telling him his ideas stink and he needs a haircut and a shave.
you were in charge of star trek canon
- Thread starter lordsofelsewhen
- Start date
I like this. Let's work together.
As for me, I'd hire Ron Moore just so could have the pleasure of firing him while telling him his ideas stink and he needs a haircut and a shave.
I wonder how Memory Alpha would make Star Trek Monopoly fit in with the rest of the universe.
In multiple instances various Federation and alien locations and planets were offered for sale. Various unknown entities would then compete to become the wealthiest through buying, renting and selling of these properties. Replicas of various federation citizens, spacecraft, and other objects were used as tokens buy these unknown entities.
That's what I do when people mention Enterprise, JJ Trek, or the so-called TOS-R.
In multiple instances various Federation and alien locations and planets were offered for sale. Various unknown entities would then compete to become the wealthiest through buying, renting and selling of these properties. Replicas of various federation citizens, spacecraft, and other objects were used as tokens buy these unknown entities.
That's what I do when people mention Enterprise, JJ Trek, or the so-called TOS-R.
I'd toss everything and start over. Star Trek canon is like an overgrown forest in need of a cleansing fire.
Once its all gone I'd start from scratch and incorporate the good ideas while ignoring the crap and moving things around to be less crap.
Once its all gone I'd start from scratch and incorporate the good ideas while ignoring the crap and moving things around to be less crap.
Yup, this.
Which for me means everything but the Cage is now "Legends," and any future projects will be based strictly on the original pilot.
No. Just no. Futurama would be made canon in TOS's place.
But in a seriousness, somethings would need to be reworked, but it would all be kept. Star Trek: First Contact would be have to be be gutted. I'm not against the time traveling, but the portrayal of Zefram Cochrane's era and the actual first contact. I think I would take elements from the novel Star Trek: Federation, which i think had a more truer view of that era.
I would rename STAR TREK: The Next Generation to just STAR TREK - because no other series even comes close. It's materialised satisfaction ... if there is such a thing. And I would rename the original show as STAR TREK: The Classic Series, because it was only there, really to pave the way for the greatness that was to follow. To work out all of that camp and hammyness ... and finally get the good stuff. No doubt, Gene Roddenberry had to turn to his associates, when TNG first hit aired and said, "sometimes, I amaze even myself." But I wouldn't change anything else, saying "this is canon" and "this is not." The rest of the franchise is just the icing on the cake.
I would take the enterprise out of canon. I would take all the tng films out of canon except first contact .so no enterprise d end of data end of kirk.the j.j. universe cna stay in a seperate universe,
All of these would be canon:
http://www.megomuseum.com/galleries/trek-toys/
Especially the Trekulator.
http://www.megomuseum.com/galleries/trek-toys/
Especially the Trekulator.
I'd drop the word "canon" since it's really an issue of continuity here.
Keep Jadzia, add Ezri from another Trill
Blow up the Scimitar and retrieve android smart enough to jettison self back to Enterprise
TATV is flashback, not shoehorned fat-assed timetravel
Add budget for TFF
Don't plan The Motion Picture while high watching 2001
DS9: more lighting, more HD, less atheistic depiction of religion, no avatar crap, which always struck me as contempt for fandom like fans worship the studio's crumbs
JJ Binks: Red matter? Implode Vulcan? 4 words: Temporal Agent: The Fonz.
Voyager: balls allowed
Enterprise: How about a Vulcan in control of emotion? Hmmm? And again: balls allowed.
Drop Mayweather, Kim, Chakotay, Nog, Jake, Rom, Grand Nagus, Moogie, Flaky-faced alien refugees, Borg children, Wesley Sue, Hugh, Molly O'Brien, Naomi Wildman, Treevis, Flotter, Neelix's makeup and chipperness, and Alexander Rozenko and Lwaxana on the demon planet with one oxygen tank.
Blow up the Scimitar and retrieve android smart enough to jettison self back to Enterprise
TATV is flashback, not shoehorned fat-assed timetravel
Add budget for TFF
Don't plan The Motion Picture while high watching 2001
DS9: more lighting, more HD, less atheistic depiction of religion, no avatar crap, which always struck me as contempt for fandom like fans worship the studio's crumbs
JJ Binks: Red matter? Implode Vulcan? 4 words: Temporal Agent: The Fonz.
Voyager: balls allowed
Enterprise: How about a Vulcan in control of emotion? Hmmm? And again: balls allowed.
Drop Mayweather, Kim, Chakotay, Nog, Jake, Rom, Grand Nagus, Moogie, Flaky-faced alien refugees, Borg children, Wesley Sue, Hugh, Molly O'Brien, Naomi Wildman, Treevis, Flotter, Neelix's makeup and chipperness, and Alexander Rozenko and Lwaxana on the demon planet with one oxygen tank.
If I was in charge of canon I'd say to the JJ-stuff: "you over there.." and then to the other stuff: "...and YOU over there.."
"....and don't intermingle. Because if you intermingle there'll be hell to pay on this forum I'm on...Alright?"
"....and don't intermingle. Because if you intermingle there'll be hell to pay on this forum I'm on...Alright?"
More:
Data dies like the Godfather, playing in the sun with his grandchild with an orange peel smile, and his internal chronometer winds to zero and his functions cease.
Captain Kirk destroys Soran's mountain contraption but gets sucked up into the Nexus somehow. We bid him farewell knowing his character could always make another appearance some day. Picard bears witness to Kirk's final act of heroism, which teaches him how to take a leap of faith - and also make a stand for ethics despite the Prime Directive.
The Borg and the Romulans decimate each other. We see Admiral Jarok borgified as Picard's new nemesis in First Contact. The Borg queen was a holographic ruse the whole time.
Worf and Deanna
Worf and Jadzia
Kira and Odo
Sisko and Kassidy Yates
Trip and T'Pol
Chakotay and Seven
Scotty and Uhura
- all happened in parallel universes. OFF SCREEN.
Only Riker/Troi, and Paris/Torres survive the couple-canon timeline.
And...
NO YOGA!
NO GOTHIC HOLONOVELS!
NO FOOT RUBS!!!
And quite probably NO ESP.
More weird planets and weird societies that reflect our own mores and the salient issues.
And stop killing main characters off when they are no longer employed. It's so petty! Did you think we wouldn't know you had a choice and you chose to be a petty d**k holding a character's life hostage? Yes, people die, but as story devices, these characters have stories to explore and we fans don't like having the fictional characters YOU created and WE invested time getting to know turned into a Plot Twist before commercial. It's your stupid brand, why take a dump all over it?
Yay I'm the director I'm going to erase the last half century of cultural continuity, look at my big, swinging medallion, everybody! It's a big ol' steaming VALENTINE!
Data dies like the Godfather, playing in the sun with his grandchild with an orange peel smile, and his internal chronometer winds to zero and his functions cease.
Captain Kirk destroys Soran's mountain contraption but gets sucked up into the Nexus somehow. We bid him farewell knowing his character could always make another appearance some day. Picard bears witness to Kirk's final act of heroism, which teaches him how to take a leap of faith - and also make a stand for ethics despite the Prime Directive.
The Borg and the Romulans decimate each other. We see Admiral Jarok borgified as Picard's new nemesis in First Contact. The Borg queen was a holographic ruse the whole time.
Worf and Deanna
Worf and Jadzia
Kira and Odo
Sisko and Kassidy Yates
Trip and T'Pol
Chakotay and Seven
Scotty and Uhura
- all happened in parallel universes. OFF SCREEN.
Only Riker/Troi, and Paris/Torres survive the couple-canon timeline.
And...
NO YOGA!
NO GOTHIC HOLONOVELS!
NO FOOT RUBS!!!
And quite probably NO ESP.
More weird planets and weird societies that reflect our own mores and the salient issues.
And stop killing main characters off when they are no longer employed. It's so petty! Did you think we wouldn't know you had a choice and you chose to be a petty d**k holding a character's life hostage? Yes, people die, but as story devices, these characters have stories to explore and we fans don't like having the fictional characters YOU created and WE invested time getting to know turned into a Plot Twist before commercial. It's your stupid brand, why take a dump all over it?
Yay I'm the director I'm going to erase the last half century of cultural continuity, look at my big, swinging medallion, everybody! It's a big ol' steaming VALENTINE!
Instead, do the same thing with Kirk that they did with Scotty.
Sorry, but could you explain this one?
I would set up an 'I'm the official keeper of the Star Trek canon' webpage, just so everyone would know where to direct their bile. Then I'd have it contain only a banner with said title, and an embedded MP3 that plays the theme to MST3K on repeat.
As for the show...canonise that Kirk's pansexual. Oh, and make Star Wars, Flash Gorden and Stargate some of those parallel worlds from TNG. I'm sure the owners of those properties would be completely up for it, and fans wouldn't complain at all. Fuck it, throw in both BSG's, Thunderbirds, Lost In Space, and Buck Rogers for good measure.
As for the show...canonise that Kirk's pansexual. Oh, and make Star Wars, Flash Gorden and Stargate some of those parallel worlds from TNG. I'm sure the owners of those properties would be completely up for it, and fans wouldn't complain at all. Fuck it, throw in both BSG's, Thunderbirds, Lost In Space, and Buck Rogers for good measure.
Merry Christmas, for you, I'll try.
I meant, why, for DS9 to work, does there have to be any kind of prophetic use of Sisko as some sort of Chosen One? When all he has done, as Chosen One, is square off against Dukat in a fistfight at the right moment? Why must he be imbued with all of the otherwordly stuff?
What I'm saying here is that the story could have been told from a mortal point of view rather than a mythical one. Also, for an alien planet, the religion is very Judeo-Christian in its practices. Churches, prayer, avatar figure, epic battles between the forces of good vs evil - and this from wormhole aliens who didn't even get the concept of time, for goodness' sake, but they know about fire caves and battle for control of the mundane universe. Hello? Stars? Space and time?
I could have been fine with Sisko being a Starfleet captain in a lousy posting making the best with what he's got. The Bajoran religion was designed how an atheist might view a religion - as a set of amusing customs and self-indulgent rituals, built up around the institutionalized misinterpretation of scientific fact. Then on top of this they go and make Sisko the One, and ascend him. Well which is it?
And yes, I felt, personally, that it was just a little contempt for fandom's elevation of fictional characters to "godlike" status. The whole thing feels cynical to me.
FIFY
Some gold nuggets there, Hela.
But I'm pretty sure all of those shows made it into the canon already. 
But if I were The Keeper of De Canon, I would no longer be just one of the whiny fans.
I would be God. I shall have beheld Satan as he came down from heaven! LIKE LIGHTNING!
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