Exactly. Caprica had a gay mob assassin who was the uncle of Adama from BSG. He had a husband and it would come up in dialogue in a natural way because in their society it was completely accepted."I'm sure there will be a gay character, I just hope it isn't cringe-worthy "Look at the gay guy!"."
It's 2015, all you need is the male character x is married to another man, it's never mentioned or referred to in any way - we just see them together.
Other shows manage this all the time, I'm not sure why Trek would find it so difficult.