Star Wars: Episode VII: The Nerd Rage Awakens

[Corran Horn]

I can't wait for the opening crawl of TFA...

"It is a time of economic strife - Imperial financiers, working to destabilize the Republic Credit, have devalued their currency..."

 

[davejames]

There wasn't any part of that romance that was even remotely credible. I almost would have preferred if we never saw any of it, and it was only revealed at the end that they had been secretly hooking up and Padme was now pregnant with the twins.

Instead of trying to turn it into some "epic, tragic romance" that just didn't work at all.

 

[cooleddie74]

The new crawl should use Comic Sans font just to piss off as many people as possible. The film itself could be the greatest Star Wars movie ever written and produced but if the opening crawl looks like something from an Internet meme it'll have fans in the streets looting and pillaging before the end credits roll.

 

[CorporalCaptain]

The new crawl should use Comic Sans font just to piss off as many people as possible.

And not go to a vanishing point in 3D Flash Gordon style, but just scroll up in 2D like a regular crawl.

 

[Mach5]

The new crawl should use Comic Sans font just to piss off as many people as possible.

Back when I interned at the (neighboring) city hall, I got my hands on a letter addressed to the city (a petition concerning the zoning), written entirely in Comic Sans. Header, footer, syntax and grammar were otherwise impeccable.

 

[Timby]

The new crawl should use Comic Sans font just to piss off as many people as possible. The film itself could be the greatest Star Wars movie ever written and produced but if the opening crawl looks like something from an Internet meme it'll have fans in the streets looting and pillaging before the end credits roll.

I wish Damon Lindelof had been involved in the writing, just so the Nerd Boogeyman being involved in the singularity of the Star Trek, Star Wars and Alien franchises would make the Internet explode.

 

[Mach5]

I wish Damon Lindelof had been involved in the writing,

Take that back.

Don't even joke about that shit. Seriously.

 

[davejames]

The Lindelof of Lost and the Leftovers I wouldn't mind. But the Lindelof of pretty much everything else? Heck no.

 

[Mach5]

The Lindelof of Lost and the Leftovers I wouldn't mind.

LOST never got a satisfying resolution, and Leftovers is a book adaptation with the author himself executive-producing. Lindelof can handle an adaptation (WWZ was kinda ok).

But the Lindelof of pretty much everything else? Heck no.

nuTrek is pretty good.

Luckily, Kurtzman and Orci were there to keep him on a leash... Sadly, it didn't work so well with Cowboys & Aliens.

Prometheus, however, should be taught at screenwriting classes. So many great examples of what to avoid.

 

[ManOnTheWave]

I wish Damon Lindelof had been involved in the writing, just so the Nerd Boogeyman being involved in the singularity of the Star Trek, Star Wars and Alien franchises would make the Internet explode.

 

[BigJake]

Lindelof's work on Lost is the reason that "pulling a Lost" became a recognizable shorthand for "!@#$-ing up the ending." Yeah he's defensive about it but, you know, it went how it went. (And I don't see any reason to rate either of STID or Prometheus as being more or less broken than the other.)

 

[sojourner]

I liked the end of Lost.

 

[TREK_GOD_1]

Don't get me wrong, I despised the senate scenes in TPM. The story came to a complete halt when they happened. It was basically Lucas shouting LOOK AT THIS SCENE THIS IS IMPORTANT HISTORY LESSON. They really could have been massively trimmed.

The senate scenes were an example of poor scripting hurting an important moment that sets the stage for the rest of the series--it was that important. Palpatine's orchestrated chaos begins there--not the man sneering and the lightsaber fights obsessed over by the extreme SW geeks.

There wasn't any part of that romance that was even remotely credible. I almost would have preferred if we never saw any of it, and it was only revealed at the end that they had been secretly hooking up and Padme was now pregnant with the twins.

Instead of trying to turn it into some "epic, tragic romance" that just didn't work at all.

For the original films, Lucas took many sources of inspiration for the basic story, but in the prequels he was over the top, hitting audiences over the head in "sourcing" classical stories, all to sell the stillborn idea of Anakin being some kind, loving hero who falls from grace.

The problem in that is in order for Anakin to turn in the "teh worstest evil EVAH," it could not be believable to have that happen overnight, so almost from the start, Anakin had to be a self-obsessed, violent asshole, and that personality cannot stand side by side with some great, likable hero, and there's no Sith manipulation that would warrant an overnight change, anyway.

Then, there's the amateur show romance, which--as you said--just did not work at all. Padme's motivations were expressed like Lucas did not know how any woman thinks/feels at all. Moreover, aside from Portman's being cast in the series at a time when she was sick eye-candy for loser men still thinking about her role in The Professional, her so-called abilities left much to be desired. Whether it was the horrible "regal" queen voice, or her other whining voice, Portman added nothing to the prequels.

Well, I guess scenes of her in outfits or the bun hairdo meant to evoke memories of Leia made it all worthwhile.

 

[Awesome Possum]

I liked the end of Lost.

So did I, but I cared more about the characters than the mythology.

 

[BigJake]

Lost lost me by the top of the third season when I realized they were neck deep in MacGuffins and contrivances and there was just no way they had a plan for any of the plot threads to pay off. I was Jack's Complete Lack of Surprise when the (very nearly it-was-all-a-dream plot of the) finale left all the obsessive Easter Egg-tracking fans scratching their heads.

 

[CorporalCaptain]

I never watched more than a few episodes of Lost. So, I'm lost.

 

[sojourner]

I think the knee-jerk reaction of "they were dead all along!" (Which is incorrect) ruined it for alot of fans. But the finale was really more of a "where are they now?" re-acquaintance with the characters in the afterlife. No, it didn't wrap up the mythos that had been created, but it did give a nice completion to the character's arcs.

I really think the message of the finale was that it's not the journey, but the people you share it with that are important.

It made me misty-eyed.

 

[RoJoHen]

I think the knee-jerk reaction of "they were dead all along!" (Which is incorrect) ruined it for alot of fans. But the finale was really more of a "where are they now?" re-acquaintance with the characters in the afterlife. No, it didn't wrap up the mythos that had been created, but it did give a nice completion to the character's arcs.

I really think the message of the finale was that it's not the journey, but the people you share it with that are important.

It made me misty-eyed.

I cried four different times during that stupid finale! SO MANY FEELINGS!!!

Seriously, I really think the people who didn't like the finale are people that weren't paying that much attention or were watching for the wrong reasons.

 

[Corran Horn]

I really think the message of the finale was that it's not the journey, but the people you share it with that are important.

I enjoyed it. It couldn't be all things to all people. It was setup to be criticized.

 

[Mr Light]

The first five seasons of LOST are almost perfect to me. I was fundamentally disappointed with the final season on so many levels but not in the lack of answers. They answered all the big questions. And they weren't dead the whole time. It was certainly disappointing and anti-climactic, but it DID wrap everything up and explain everything, and I don't understand people who say otherwise.