ENT Caption Competition #102: Sid Meier's Star Trek
- Thread starter Nebusj
- Start date
And with the press of one indecipherable alien control, Captain Archer unknowingly castrated every male officer aboard Enterprise and actually gave Travis something to do.
REED: [thinks] Don't say "Those are some massive balls". DON'T say "Those are some massive balls". You are a Starfleet officer - show some dignity, for God's sake. But my God, those ARE some massive balls.
See? I TOLD you these clothes weren't "smart casual".
Just step up on top of those boxes, would you? Our tractor beam seems to be a litle weak today.
The coffee machine sure is impressive, but by the time the barista gets back here it'll be cold...
Do you know a good dermatologist? I mean, a really good one?
Archer: "You know, I don't care what this place is or what you guys are up to. Just tell me there's a men's bathroom down there and I'll let you do whatever you want to this planet."
Malurian: "I said hit 'Transport,' not 'Beadazzle'!!"
T'Pol: Captain, pushing the call button multiple times will not make the elevator get here any faster.
T'Pol: It is a Venn diagram. This sphere represents the Starfleet officers who have the leadership capability to effectively lead what could amount to an open-ended mission of warfare. This sphere represents the Starfleet officers who have the tactical and strategic abilities to actually be able to defeat the Xindi. And this final sphere represents the Starfleet officers currently serving aboard this ship.
Archer: But none of the spheres intersect.
T'Pol: Ah, then you see the problem. Excellent. I was worried I would need to resort to finger puppets.
T'Pol: "Either our sensors are picking up three unidentified spatial phenomena at a distance of just three thousand kilometers, or Commander Tucker has been eating pink cotton candy over the tactical display again."
T'Pol: Captain, the ambassadors from Balloonia IV are here.
T'Pol: A cluster of 3 Neutron stars, very unusual and more worthy of appearing on this screen than Commander Tucker's favorite cat videos.
Reed: We have scanners that can magnify to this close from orbit, but we haven't yet installed the Phase Cannons?
Archer: Don't worry, those are the movers I hired to help me get my stuff to the Enterprise.
Trip: Cap'n, didn't you hire the "Blue Tractor Movers?"
Archer: Oh, S&%$!
Archer: Archer to Enterprise, I've got an idea on how to deal with these guys. Send down the Horta eggs...
Archer: It's just a blinking light! This isn't a control panel at all!
Archer: Archer to Reed. Contact my lawyer.
Reed: (over comm) I told you NOT to confuse them!
"Captain, we're now within sensor range of the Bubble Gum People of the Alpha Bazooka Joe system."
"Somehow I thought the deluxe-package tour of Hoover Dam would be more interesting than this."
Walmart...OF THE FUTURE!!!!
"These new IKEA stores are really getting out of control and fast."
Archer: Dammit, Priceline! This isn't what "room with a view" is supposed to mean!
Archer: "You say this place is equipped with the most advanced technology you have. Does it come equipped with anything to make this plot more interesting?"
The Minibar.
Archer: "You say this place is equipped with the most advanced technology you have. Does it come equipped with anything to make this plot more interesting?"
The Minibar.
Archer: "You say this place is equipped with the most advanced technology you have. Does it come equipped with anything to make this plot more interesting?"
Oh we have to face the Minibari? That will be interesting.
"Captain, we're entering the Mickey Mouse cluster. Systems are acting a little goofy."
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