Do you like you?

[F. King Daniel]

Self loathing and self pity are recurring themes in Misc. It's time to draw the lines and see where everyone stands.

Do you like you? Although things like your financial situation, or job, or relationships, or whatever are probably contributing factors, this is about how you see yourself.

I like me. There are certain things I wish I could change about myself (some within my powers to do so, some not), but I know I'm a good person and a nice guy. I have yet to reach my potential (i.e. not rich and famous yet), and although my situation isn't perfect I'm mostly happy with me.



Your turn, Miscers. Or just vote.

 

[Kestra]

Undecided. I like myself most of the time, but that all used to be based on the belief that I was a kind and good person. Some things called that into doubt and now I'm not entirely sure. I failed my own morals in some major ways. On a superficial level I definitely like myself. Sure I have loads of flaws, but I have a lot of positive traits as well.

Edit: I agree with you that many people in Misc. seem to have self-esteem problems, but I don't think that's unusual and I don't want to make it out to be some negative thing that they feel they can't express here. I know it's annoying when someone seemingly asks for advice only to turn it into a pityfest, but there are posters here who have genuine problems and could benefit from our support.

 

[Brent]

"I don't like myself much. There's a lot I would like to change about me."

 

[Amaris]

I do like myself. Aside from a few small changes, mostly health improvements, I like me as I am.

 

[Scout101]

Voted for the 2nd one. I'm not perfect, but I'm not bad, either, and have a lot of stuff going for me. And working to improve accomplishes a lot more than bitching and self-pity, so what's the point? If you're not gonna man up and take steps to try and change things, not a lot of people are going to want to listen to you complain about them...

Hate your job? Get a new one. Unhappy relationship? Leave, or work at it. Fat? Work out more, eat better. Unhappy virgin? Get off the computer, and talk to a human female. Or even stay ON the computer, find a dating site, and work that angle.

Or just learn to love who and what you are. A lot of unhappiness stems from people disliking themselves, but not being willing to do anything about it. Which puts out a huge "stay away, I'm not worth talking to" vibe to everyone else, so leads to the no friends, being alone problem people are bitching about in the first place...

 

[iguana_tonante]

I love myself.

Some may say I love myself too much, but how can love be measured? How much love is too much? How much is too little? Love is love. I know that, no matter what, I will always be by my side, and that's all I ask myself.

I love myself for my sharp mind, I love myself for my manicured body, I love myself for my witty personality. I love myself for the long days of work, and for the even longer nights of fun. I love myself for the laughs and the tears. I love myself for the fantastic sex.

Obviously, I have some flaws, and there are a few things I wish were different, but like all true love stories, I love myself also because of those flaws, not in spite of them. I can't imagine a life without me, and my life wouldn't be the same without me around.

So, even with all the fights and the few disappointments, I love myself with all my heart, and I want to spend the rest of my life with me.

 

[JarodRussell]

Self loathing and self pity are recurring themes in Misc. It's time to draw the lines and see where everyone stands.

Opening a can of worms here, but it would be surprising if it was any different on a Trek board.

 

[captcalhoun]

i'm okay.

 

[Amaris]

Self loathing and self pity are recurring themes in Misc. It's time to draw the lines and see where everyone stands.

Opening a can of worms here, but it would be surprising if it was any different on a Trek board.

I'd imagine it would be most places. It's interesting, really. On one hand, in school, we're taught that we're special, that we should love and respect ourselves. We get this message all through the early schools, the middle schools, into high school, and somewhere there, things change, but only around you. Bullies, people who just don't like you, kids with rich parents/poor parents who don't like you for being poor/rich, smart kids who don't like you because you don't know anything about the things they like, and not so smart kids who fight anything they don't understand, and the smart kids take the brunt of it in that one, and so there's some conflict.

The heavy stuff starts once you get out of high school. The message changes in society, and becomes "you're not special, you're far from perfect, and in fact, you're probably a screw-up." That's from society at large. From the commercial system, we have "you're not special, but our products can make you special. You're flawed and have no identity without our product". So there are conflicting messages, and it happens to everyone in some way.

There are some who can overlook that powerful negativity and know themselves enough that they are indeed unique, and there are others who want to believe it, but think there is still something wrong, and then you get the people who just cannot believe in themselves at all. They have been thoroughly convinced they're pablum, and that when they die no one would care. It's a shame to see people on that level, because every person is unique, every person is worth respecting, every person has a right to be who they are as long as they don't harm another.

Just rambling.

 

[captcalhoun]

speak for yourself. no one ever told me i was special and whilst i got a lot of abuse in school, no one said i was 'probably a screw up'.

 

[Aurian]

I have low self-esteem even though I reasonably can understand that I am pretty good at most things and I try to be helpful and go out of my way to make people feel good. I always fear failing though and if someone does not like me I automatically think they must have good reasons for it and feel awful because they must be right. Mostly I think I have a very bad sense of self. Must stop doing that.

 

[Amaris]

speak for yourself. no one ever told me i was special and whilst i got a lot of abuse in school, no one said i was 'probably a screw up'.

No one told you in Kindergarten that you were special? No teacher or preacher told you that you could do anything as long as you put your mind to it? No older people told you that teenagers were irresponsible? Or that your generation didn't understand real work and sacrifice?

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

I tolerate myself, that's about as close as I dare get.

 

[Eyes]

I like myself mostly. I'd love to love myself completely, but there are still a few problems with that. It's nothing I can't sort out though, so I'm quite happy with liking me.

 

[captcalhoun]

speak for yourself. no one ever told me i was special and whilst i got a lot of abuse in school, no one said i was 'probably a screw up'.

No one told you in Kindergarten that you were special? No teacher or preacher told you that you could do anything as long as you put your mind to it? No older people told you that teenagers were irresponsible? Or that your generation didn't understand real work and sacrifice?

no. possibly. yes, but tehy never included me in that. and see previous answer.

 

[Amaris]

speak for yourself. no one ever told me i was special and whilst i got a lot of abuse in school, no one said i was 'probably a screw up'.

No one told you in Kindergarten that you were special? No teacher or preacher told you that you could do anything as long as you put your mind to it? No older people told you that teenagers were irresponsible? Or that your generation didn't understand real work and sacrifice?

no. possibly. yes, but tehy never included me in that. and see previous answer.

Okay.

 

[RandyS]

No, I don't like me.

I LOVE me! I am perfection personified. The sun rises and sets on me.

The rest of the world may not see the obvious.

Screw them.

 

[Holdfast]

I feel I'm progressing well down the road to self-actualisation/individuation. It is a lifelong - if not longer(!) - journey, but I think I'm doing very well so far.

 

[Amaris]

I feel I'm progressing well down the road to self-actualisation/individuation. It is a lifelong - if not longer(!) - journey, but I think I'm doing very well so far.

You've always seemed confident in your self and your abilities to me, unless that's just your professionalism coming through.

 

[Locutus of Bored]

I don't think liking oneself and still wanting to improve yourself are mutually exclusive things. Anyway, that's about where I stand.