Most of the bridge crew are on the command track, they all had to take the test and would have fared to some difference... Who cried, who lost the entire Federation, who got sold in the Orion Slave market and who said ramming speed?
Who had the worst Kobayashi Maru and why and how?
- Thread starter Guy Gardener
- Start date
I'll give it a shot...
Kim had trouble getting the ship out of spacedock--after seven (virtual) years, the simulator was still running, with no progress forward
Paris made an analogy to 1950s automobiles that none of the other cadets got, and which failed to impress the virtual Klingons
Torres immediately ordered ramming speed, because the way the Klingon commander ordered her to surrender reminded her of her rigid, inflexible mother
Tuvok didn't take the Kobayashi Maru, but managed to come up with a solution that still brings a tear to everyone's eye
Chakotay fell asleep in his chair, and no one noticed until the Klingons launched a full spread of photon torpedos, destroying the ship. The Klingons were so enraged at having wasted their time with such an unworthy foe that they attacked a nearby Federation outpost, precipitating a violent, decades-long war
Janeway let her hair down, made that resolute face, and stuck to her guns so persuasively that she ended up being given command of the Klingon ship--before the computer sent an armada of 12 more ships to finish the job. She went down grimacing, though.
Kim had trouble getting the ship out of spacedock--after seven (virtual) years, the simulator was still running, with no progress forward
Paris made an analogy to 1950s automobiles that none of the other cadets got, and which failed to impress the virtual Klingons
Torres immediately ordered ramming speed, because the way the Klingon commander ordered her to surrender reminded her of her rigid, inflexible mother
Tuvok didn't take the Kobayashi Maru, but managed to come up with a solution that still brings a tear to everyone's eye
Chakotay fell asleep in his chair, and no one noticed until the Klingons launched a full spread of photon torpedos, destroying the ship. The Klingons were so enraged at having wasted their time with such an unworthy foe that they attacked a nearby Federation outpost, precipitating a violent, decades-long war
Janeway let her hair down, made that resolute face, and stuck to her guns so persuasively that she ended up being given command of the Klingon ship--before the computer sent an armada of 12 more ships to finish the job. She went down grimacing, though.
Janeway - Her future self came back from the future and gave her the computer command codes. The klingons were thus so impressed with her beautiful bun of doom they surrendered immediately.
Chakotay - Summoned his animal spirit, who advised him to try a peaceful diplomatic solution. His ship was vaporized shortly thereafter.
Tuvok - Vulcans don't take the test. A no win scenario is not logical.
Torres - Told the Klingons to F' off. Souped up her self destruct and destroyed all enemy warships.
Paris - Asked if they wanted to shoot some pool. Everyone got drunk at Sandrine's. What were we testing again?
Kim - Strained himself in the command chair....
Seven - Used her nanoprobes to phase state the Klingon's shields and administered a hyperbolic pulse which forced all the enemy vessels to target each other and fire disruptors. Seven wins.
Neelix - Threw the Klingons a "we surrender party." Then poisoned them with a leola root caserole.
Kes - Vaporized their brains using her telekinetic Jedi mind powers.
Doctor - Hologrid went off line with the first shot. END PROGRAM
Chakotay - Summoned his animal spirit, who advised him to try a peaceful diplomatic solution. His ship was vaporized shortly thereafter.
Tuvok - Vulcans don't take the test. A no win scenario is not logical.
Torres - Told the Klingons to F' off. Souped up her self destruct and destroyed all enemy warships.
Paris - Asked if they wanted to shoot some pool. Everyone got drunk at Sandrine's. What were we testing again?
Kim - Strained himself in the command chair....
Seven - Used her nanoprobes to phase state the Klingon's shields and administered a hyperbolic pulse which forced all the enemy vessels to target each other and fire disruptors. Seven wins.
Neelix - Threw the Klingons a "we surrender party." Then poisoned them with a leola root caserole.
Kes - Vaporized their brains using her telekinetic Jedi mind powers.
Doctor - Hologrid went off line with the first shot. END PROGRAM
Why not Cardassians or Romulans? 
Sarek used the Romulans, and it's TOS-movie era. Kirk's nephew's approach to the test hinged on their being Romulans, actually...
The Romulans, Cardasians, Klingons and the Dominion are all now friends who would be mighty put out to find that their allies are learning how to kill their children.
Who does that leave?
I mean, a Borg shuttle can take down the Federation, so it's inconsiderate to assume any battle with the Borg is "hopeful".
By the way, I don't think B'Elanna took the Kobqyashi Maru before she quit the academy since Kim took command in Future's end while she was standing right next to him the whole time.
Who does that leave?
I mean, a Borg shuttle can take down the Federation, so it's inconsiderate to assume any battle with the Borg is "hopeful".
By the way, I don't think B'Elanna took the Kobqyashi Maru before she quit the academy since Kim took command in Future's end while she was standing right next to him the whole time.
Gosh do you recall the Enterprise J fighting the Sphere Builders on the fringe of altered space?
A much more impressive 25th century than Buck Rogers showed me as a child.
The superlative Cassiday Yates has a brother, Kornellius, who is in a baseball league on Cestus III playing for the Pike City Pioneers.
By hook or by Crook the Federation retook Cestus III somehow from the Gorn, and maybe just possibly, the humans play the Gorn in baseball to "win" interim leadership of the world for some period while everyone else just rubs shoulders peaceably as the paper shuffling changes hands.
Tholian traders stopped by DS9 form time to time and Sisko bought bedsheets off them. Made a baby on them. Hardly something you want to do atop contraband. Although gods knows how many bastard offspring Kirk conceived from the bottom of a bottle of Romulus Ale.
The Breen look unrepentant.
A much more impressive 25th century than Buck Rogers showed me as a child.
The superlative Cassiday Yates has a brother, Kornellius, who is in a baseball league on Cestus III playing for the Pike City Pioneers.
By hook or by Crook the Federation retook Cestus III somehow from the Gorn, and maybe just possibly, the humans play the Gorn in baseball to "win" interim leadership of the world for some period while everyone else just rubs shoulders peaceably as the paper shuffling changes hands.
Tholian traders stopped by DS9 form time to time and Sisko bought bedsheets off them. Made a baby on them. Hardly something you want to do atop contraband. Although gods knows how many bastard offspring Kirk conceived from the bottom of a bottle of Romulus Ale.
The Breen look unrepentant.
Janeway's would have been the worst. She'd have found a way to break both the Prime Directive and the Temporal Prime Directive while saving the Kobayashi Maru. She'd also lose points for incedibly cheesy one-liners during the simulation (variations on "Chronowerks' stock... is about to crash!" and just before the inevitable suicide run, "Time's... up!")
Seven of Nine would open a portal to fluidic space, spamming the Klingons with Species 8472 bio-ships, which wind up destroying not only the Klingons, the Kobayashi Maru and Seven's ship but also purge the simulated galaxy of all life.
Seven of Nine would open a portal to fluidic space, spamming the Klingons with Species 8472 bio-ships, which wind up destroying not only the Klingons, the Kobayashi Maru and Seven's ship but also purge the simulated galaxy of all life.
Tuvok. His attempt to grapple the situation with logic prevented him from even entering the Neutral Zone. The Klingons destroyed the Maru with all hands. But because of his whole "logic" attitude, he doesn't regret it or get emotional about it. But he never brings it up...
Lets see:
Janeway: She is unwilling to let the Kobayashi Maru be destroyed, sacrificing herself and her crew to protect them, unfortunately, this results in low grades for the cadets who had to be with her on that simulation and Janeway spent the next 7 years wondering if she had done the right thing.
Tuvok: He retreats, learning the lesson he would one day teach Dalby and the other Maquis he instructs on Voyager.
Paris: Was going to cheat, but for some reason couldn't bring himself to do it when he found out his father would be proctoring the test.
Torres: Starts a brawl with the other cadets in the simulator, the enemy destroys them while they're distracted.
Kim: No one can really quantify what happened here, He gave orders to the other Cadets, nobody followed them instead they just laughed at him until the end of the test.
Janeway: She is unwilling to let the Kobayashi Maru be destroyed, sacrificing herself and her crew to protect them, unfortunately, this results in low grades for the cadets who had to be with her on that simulation and Janeway spent the next 7 years wondering if she had done the right thing.
Tuvok: He retreats, learning the lesson he would one day teach Dalby and the other Maquis he instructs on Voyager.
Paris: Was going to cheat, but for some reason couldn't bring himself to do it when he found out his father would be proctoring the test.
Torres: Starts a brawl with the other cadets in the simulator, the enemy destroys them while they're distracted.
Kim: No one can really quantify what happened here, He gave orders to the other Cadets, nobody followed them instead they just laughed at him until the end of the test.
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