What if the PTB had been paying attention?

[Bry_Sinclair]

Even as VOY was going through its original run, Neelix was hated, Chakotay and Kim came off as dull and did little more than fill chairs.

What if the PTB had been on the ball, realised that the characters just weren't working and decided at the end of S3 going into S4 they needed to have a massive shake up. How could they have dropped all three at one time? Who would you have wanted to replace them? Would you still want to see Seven strutting around?

How would you have changed things?

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

ALL FEMALE BRIDGE CREW.

Also, the cook.

 

[Melakon]

How could they have dropped all three at one time?

Whoops! Lost another shuttlecraft, no survivors.

 

[Dream]

They were never going to get rid of Neelix since he was only wacky looking alien on the show.

Anyone besides me notice that the male characters were the weak link on VOY?

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

Yes.

After we kill off Paris in that men loaded shuttle a tachyon displacement wave nebula envelops the ship and deposits Mirror Universe Lieutenant Stadi onto the bridge. She neatly takes over Paris's seat and we get at least 2 episodes before she stops bearing her midriff.

 

[Dream]

After we kill off Paris in that men loaded shuttle a tachyon displacement wave nebula envelops the ship and deposits Mirror Universe Lieutenant Stadi onto the bridge. She neatly takes over Paris's seat and we get at least 2 episodes before she stops bearing her midriff.

Q would appear afterwards

"Say, is this a ship of the Valkyries? Or have you Human women finally done away with your men altogether?"

 

[M.A.C.O.]

Yes.

After we kill off Paris in that men loaded shuttle a tachyon displacement wave nebula envelops the ship and deposits Mirror Universe Lieutenant Stadi onto the bridge. She neatly takes over Paris's seat and we get at least 2 episodes before she stops bearing her midriff.

Don't kill off Paris! Who's going to dick all those women down? Besides at least Tom was entertaining to watch. Kim, Chakotay, hell even B'Ellanna could all have gotten to airlock. Chakotay and Kim both as entertaining as watching grass grow and a trope Klingon who throws bitch fits.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

Who's going to dick all those women down?

Well obviously they are going to take care of each other.

 

[lurok]

+ the holodeck.

Also, is the Doc still onboard? Or does he get a gender change?

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

The Doc is who they point to whenever someone starts whining about there being no men. To remember all the stuff that they don't miss about them.

Actually I don't know how we got rid of them all, I just wanted to all womanize the bridge crew and the cook. We can still have men on the ship, they just won't be very important.

At some point there will be a lower decks type episode in which after weeks of women captaining, piloting, science-ing, engineering and cooking we get to see what the men's lives are like. It will be all jocular and full of references to primitive combat games.

During the episode in order to help us relate to them one man will ask another, "have you noticed how your balls have started to firm up?" Of course it will be because of some space phenomenon that serves as the secondary story to the special men episode.

 

[Brit]

LOL, you all reminded me of a fic written by Kerry. Q turned all the men on Voyager into puppies. Chakotay was a Labrador Retriever with chocolate brown eyes. Seven gathered all the male command officers up in a basket.

Still in the basket was a lopsided, huge eyed Great Dane puppy. “Neelix?” she said, her eyebrows arched. He straightened up with a deep, rolling woof. She looked at B’Elanna. B’Elanna shrugged.

“I expected a Chihuahua,” Seven said.

The rest is here http://abderian.net/kerry/gone-to-the-dogs/#more-83 if anyone is interested.

 

[lurok]

[yt]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9_4ohoEVlc[/yt]

 

[Lance]

Chakotay and Kim came off as dull and did little more than fill chairs.

They both had important jobs. Janeway didn't want those chairs getting dusty on the way back to the Alpha Quadrant. Chakotay's bristles are much better than any average dusting cloth.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

What bristles? Only Neelix has bristles, though those are on his face and I don't think he'd be rubbing his face on a chair..

OH! Are you saying that Chakotay has bristles on his butt?

 

[R. Star]

Well the concept about men being the weak link on Voyager isn't completely founded. The Doctor was probably the most consistent and competent character on the shop. Tom Paris was a virtual Mary Sue with all the random crap he can do. Pilot, field medic, starship designer, commando and random history expert. Tuvok was average, but not so much dull as he was just... another Vulcan.

Chakotay was weak. Ironic I thought he was going to be my favorite character after I watched Caretaker for the first time. He was confrontational, likable and rough around the edges, something Trek needed more of, that one episode. Then he just turned into... well a background officer. I don't know if it was Beltran's acting that was the flaw or the writing. Either way every freaking random Native American cliche thrown out there didn't help at all. Personally I just think Janeway castrated him after Caretaker to ensure his compliance with her dominance.

Harry Kim... I know what they were trying to do with him. A young ensign, fresh from the Academy, new to space exploration with parents back home that we as an audience are supposed to sympathize with and see space for the first time through him. What we got... he was just the routine complainer about wanting to get home, and he became Voyager's punching bag. DS9 did this with O'brien too, but where you felt sorry for him, Kim you just felt like laughing whenever he got screwed over yet again.

 

[Melakon]

Just like DS9 had what they called "O'Brien Must Suffer" episodes, Voyager must have had "Kim Must Die" episodes.

 

[Bry_Sinclair]

ALL FEMALE BRIDGE CREW.

Also, the cook.

They could have had a couple of really hot guys in anti-grav cages on the Bridge, constantly dancing in posing pouches--I'd never have missed an episode!

 

[Guy Gardener]

But their Casting People sucked.

They wouldn't know a hot guy if they burnt their fingers on his ass.

 

[Bry_Sinclair]

I'd love to have seen Tuvok in red, serving as Janeway's XO (something that would re-establish their friendship) then have him replaced at tactical by a woman (I did think Ayala, but there hasn't been a woman as security chief for far too long--even then she didn't last--so they need one in the role). This role could have gone to Jeri Ryan as Lieutenant Annika Hansen, just lose all the Borg implants and backstory.

Replace Kim with an alien officer (Benzite, Deltan, Napean, etc).

Have a random crewmember decide they don't like the uniform and is willing to take over the galley, then become a minor recurring character (I think Chell would work in nicely here, we just to know someone's cooking, we don't need any stories about them).

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

I'd love to have seen Tuvok in red, serving as Janeway's XO (something that would re-establish their friendship) .

I read all this waiting to see how it got Tuvok in one of your anti-grav gyrating cages but I see you changed tack.