TOS Caption Contest #48: Spock Grokking

[Shatmandu]

Hiya, folks.

Another fast week. Busy, busy, busy. Summers used to be a break.

Rat Boy, whose Gorn reminds me of Animal from "The Muppet Show," joins Outpost4 in the "Seven Time Winner" slot with:

Rat Boy said:

Tiffany couldn't shake the strange sensation that she had transferred to the wrong ship...
Leroy Chekov: "Now that's a voman!"
Whiskey Lips Sulu: "Meh, I've seen better."
Gorn: "Woman! Woman! Woman!"

. . . and cooleddie74 hits the jackpot with:

cooleddie74 said:

BEST...
POKER FACE...
EVER.

Spock himself gives you both a Vulcan salute, nude, with his hands behind his back. Congratulations.

This week's shots are a little high on the difficulty scale, after we get through the usual potty and wee-wee jokes. Let's see what we can do.

Joe, full of wee-wee jokes

TOS Caption Contest Pantheon of Winners

Laughing Vulcan (2x), jayrath, scottydog (2x), Gertch (2x), Guartho, Tristan, TBonz (2x), Woulfe, terranova, Rat Boy, Battrekker, AlphaTrionTJW, M'Sharak, Galleywest, Outpost4, Quo Vadimus, all y'all, cooleddie74, FishDS9, Nerys Myk and TigerOfDarkness, scottydog (3x) and Rat Boy (2x), Outpost4 (2x) and TBonz (3x), Rat Boy (3x) and commodore64, Rat Boy (4x!) and Noname Given, DeafPoet and The Tone, scottydog (4x!) and Nerys Myk (2x) & Redfern, The Tone (2x) and DrBob and cooleddie74 (2x) and Gertch (3x) and Shatmandu and Outpost4 (3x) and The Laughing Vulcan (3x) and Tharpdevenport and ancient and Woulfe (2x), cakes516 and Adam Ihle, Nerys Myk (3x) and cooleddie74 (3x), Tharpdavenport and Outpost4 (4x), Rat Boy (5x!) and Nerys Myk (4x), The Squire of Gothos and Nerys Myk (5x!), Gertch (4x) and Turbo, scottydog (5x!) and Rat Boy (6!!)and cooleddie74 (4x), Tharpdavenport (2x) and goldbug, The Laughing Vulcan (4x) and The Squire of Gothos (2x), The Squire of Gothos (3x), and galleywest (2x), Adam Ihle (2x) and DrBob(2x), DrBob (3x!) and Classic Fan, Outpost4 (5x!) and Tim M and Gertch (5x!) and DrBob (4x!!), Haggis and Tatties and A Beaker Full Of Death, Adam Ihle (3x!) and Outpost4 (6x!!), Adam Ihle (4x!) and Outpost4 (7x!!), Rat Boy (7x!!) and cooleddie74 (5x)!

 

[Shatmandu]

McCoy: ". . . then they wouldn't have dug two holes for a commode, now would they?"

Spock: "But Miss Uhura, all Vulcan love songs include the phrase 'big split dick.' It is tradition."

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

McCoy: "Stupid literal Vulcan, scouting for chicks doesn't mean scouting for chicks."
Spock: "Silence Doctor, I believe I can hear a lesser spotted greebwarbler."

Uhura: "I love it when you pluck my G-string Spock"

 

[Shatmandu]

Spock: "If you ask me to play 'Funky Town' one more time, I'll punch you in the vagina."

McCoy: "The Hulk? Beat Superman? You're out of your Vulcan mind . . ."

 

[Gertch]

"My, I've never seen such a small pick."

 

[Rat Boy]

Uhura: "If you make me sing 'Bitter Dregs' one more time, I'll shove that harp up your Vulcan ass."

McCoy: "A harp? You should have seen the stuff I saw up there in med school."

 

[M'Sharak]

Well, here we are, with the finest specimen of prime herb in the
[/i]quadrant[/i] sitting right in front of us, and you left the papers in
your quarters! God-damned Vulcans -- it figures!

 

[Sec31Mike]

[image]http://i158.photobucket.com/albums/t113/shatmandu2/gagger-1.jpg[/image]
Spock: "Uhura, your singing arouses the fires of Pon Farr in me, I am having difficulty restraining myself"

[image]http://i158.photobucket.com/albums/t113/shatmandu2/1pottybreak.jpg[/image]
McCoy: "I've seen Vulcan meditation before, but how difficult is to take a dump in the woods"

 

[Mallory]

Sec31Mike said:

Spock: "Uhura, your singing arouses the fires of Pon Farr in me, I am having difficulty restraining myself"

McCoy: "I've seen Vulcan meditation before, but how difficult is to take a dump in the woods"

Just so folks can see the images as well as your dialog.

 

[The Squire of Gothos]

McCoy; Spock, when we get back to the ship I'll explain why properly, but right now if Mr Sulu is on the prowl bushes in a quiet park near sunset aren't a great place to hide.

Uhuru; Um, Mr Spock this is embarrassing, we said we didn't think Vulcans could play a liar, not a lyre.

 

[Maurice]

BONES: Kurtz? Who in blue blazes is Colonel Kurtz? And why are we going through this godforsaken jungle to get to him?

With that loudmouth Uhura finally rendered speachless and songless by Charlie, Spock finally had his chance to cut loose with his cover of "The Bitch is Back".

 

[cooleddie74]

"Heaven help you, Spock, if you forgot to bring a roll of toilet paper with you."

UHURA:"You don't know 'Whoomp, There it Is' ?

You pointy-eared BARBARIAN!!!"

 

[Rat Boy]

McCoy: "You don't have a square to spare?"

Uhura: "Spock, you've been on that harp solo for twenty minutes."

Spock: "Be silent! I'm in a groove!"

 

[cooleddie74]

"Need I even REMIND you, Spock...this is a patch of poison ivy plants?

When we get back to the ship, we're gonna be scratching ourselves raw for a week!"

"I agreed we'd take requests, Mister Spock...but WHAT the hell is 'Tubthumping'?!"

 

[Woulfe]

From The Lost Episode : Spock In The Sky With Diamonds

McCoy : Let me get this right, You don't know what Wacky Weed is ?

Spock : No.

McCoy : How about Mary Jane ?

Spock : No.

McCoy : Come on Spock it's right in front of us, can't you smell it ?

Spock : No.

McCoy : You're pulling my leg aren't you ?

Spock : Yes.

Spock finishes playing a tune.

Uhura : That's lovely, where'd you get the idea for that song Spock ?

Spock : Well, me and the Doctor found some interesting plants on the planet and proceeded to smoke them....

- W -
* Pass that wacky weed over here why don't you *

 

[cooleddie74]

"GREAT place to hide from Jim, Spock...marvelous thinking there, Mr. Brains!

Do you know how hard it is to get chlorophyll stains out of blue velour?!?"

UHURA:"No, I WON'T sit on your lap and 'see what song ideas pop up' !!!"

 

[Rat Boy]

McCoy: "Send the guy in the red shit. That's your solution to everything!"

 

[Kirby]

UHURA: "If you don't STOP playing 'Smoke on the Water' I'm going to have to take that away from you.

[/QUOTE]

 

[KeepOnTrekking]

McCoy: "Bet you never saw 2 people getting instructions from a machine before, Mr. Spock! Do they even have voyeurs on Vulcan?"

Uhura: "What do you mean I'm 'flat'?? You'd better have those Vulcan ears checked out!"

 

[SciFi75]

You Vulcan's don't do anything small do you?