TOS Caption Contest #46: Russian Green

Hiya, folks.

Lots of fun again this week. Carl Spock made an appearance, which is always good. My workload in the near future should be getting lighter, so Leonidas and Balok Puppet might be around more, too.

This week's big boppers were Adam Ihle's third winner:

. . . and Outpost4 joins Rat Boy in the Six Time Winner's Lounge with:

Anytime we get Kirk hugging a giant penis and Spock using a Mind-Roofie in the same thread, I fell like our contribution to the internet is worth something after all. Thanks much to everyone who entered and to the winners.


This week's tinglers are:







Should be interesting.

Joe, boring


TOS Caption Contest Pantheon of Winners

Laughing Vulcan (2x), jayrath, scottydog (2x), Gertch (2x), Guartho, Tristan, TBonz (2x), Woulfe, terranova, Rat Boy, Battrekker, AlphaTrionTJW, M'Sharak, Galleywest, Outpost4, Quo Vadimus, all y'all, cooleddie74, FishDS9, Nerys Myk and TigerOfDarkness, scottydog (3x) and Rat Boy (2x), Outpost4 (2x) and TBonz (3x), Rat Boy (3x) and commodore64, Rat Boy (4x!) and Noname Given, DeafPoet and The Tone, scottydog (4x!) and Nerys Myk (2x) & Redfern, The Tone (2x) and DrBob and cooleddie74 (2x) and Gertch (3x) and Shatmandu and Outpost4 (3x) and The Laughing Vulcan (3x) and Tharpdevenport and ancient and Woulfe (2x), cakes516 and Adam Ihle, Nerys Myk (3x) and cooleddie74 (3x), Tharpdavenport and Outpost4 (4x), Rat Boy (5x!) and Nerys Myk (4x), The Squire of Gothos and Nerys Myk (5x!), Gertch (4x) and Turbo, scottydog (5x!) and Rat Boy (6!!)and cooleddie74 (4x), Tharpdavenport (2x) and goldbug, The Laughing Vulcan (4x) and The Squire of Gothos (2x), The Squire of Gothos (3x), and galleywest (2x), Adam Ihle (2x) and DrBob(2x), DrBob (3x!) and Classic Fan, Outpost4 (5x!) and Tim M and Gertch (5x!) and DrBob (4x!!), Haggis and Tatties and A Beaker Full Of Death, Adam Ihle (3x!) and Outpost4 (6x!!)!

 

Charlene Master's dilithium-powered bong idea was good one in theory . . .




Kirk: "Say 'vessel right, and I'll stop hitting you. Say 'vessel right, and I'll stop hitting you. Say 'vessel right, and I'll stop hitting you . . ."

 

Female Officer: I'd give it five minutes.



Shatner took it on himself to beat Koenig's hair into a more normal shape.

 

Carl Spock celebrates after the "Balance of Terror" incident . . .





Kirk: "Scotty was fixing my zipper, you understand FIXING IT!"

 

Jeez - I won and I didn't even have to use a dick joke. Amazing. Thank you, Joe.




(from inside) McCoy: Whatcha hurry? The steaks are lookin' mighty fine.



Kirk: No, I'm sexier.

 

It's nice to know that Blue Oyster Cult is still around in the 23nd century.

 

The failure of Sulu's door was attributed to moisture buildup from the self-installed, and very popular, bath house steam room.




Kirk: ". . . and the ol' 'knee-to-the-nuts' was inwented in Russia, too, I suppose, huh? <crunch>"

 

Kirk: When I get done with you, you'll look like Michael Nesmith.

 

Ok I promise no more Takei censored jokes.... Thanks tho for the 3rd win.


Having burned dinner both left the room in haste knowing that as soon as the BBS got ahold of the photo the fart jokes would insue



And so Pavel learned that day to not lean against the hole in the wall by the door to Sulu's quarters.

 

Chekov: Give me time
To realize my crime
Let me love and steal
I have danced inside your eyes
How can I be real

Do you really want to hurt me
Do you really want to make me cry

 

"And then I held it up to my mouth like this and blew!"
"Stop, really, you're making me cry....he he he he he..."

 

Stogie Night on the Enterprise was not for the weak-lunged.




Kirk: "This is not Chekov! *smack* If this were Chekov *smack* would I be able to do this over *smack* and over again? *smack*"

McCoy: "Uh, Jim, we killed the Salt Vampire last season. That's actually Chekov."

 

Carl: "Say hello to my leeetle friend"
Redshirt: "Shit! Who let him near the phaser rifles?"
Girl: "Who cares, just run!"



Kirk: "Just wait there while I whip this out"
Chekov: Grits teeth and starts trembling
Kirk: "I meant the sword. Shit man, you've been hanging around Sulu too long."

 

Checov: "Oh YES sir -- I will take another!"

It was then Kirk realized Sulu had rubbed off on his crew.





Girl in blue: "That's the last time I go to Carl Spock's quarters..."

 

LOL Shatmandu... lol on the name as well.

 

REDSHIRT:"DAMN, Lieutenant...

What the hell did you EAT?!?!?"



KIRK:"Sing...'Daydream Believer'...one...more...time...

and I'll KILL you!!!!"

 

Everyone was having fun until Carl accidentally lit his afro on fire.




Kirk: "Fine, I'll promote you to lieutenant, just enough with the damn singing!"

 

Suddenly, the fact that the toilet was about to overflow was the LEAST of their concerns.



"Do...NOT...say...Russians...invented...the Dirty Sanchez...ever...AGAIN!!!!"