TNG Caption This #200: 200th Contest Extravaganza!

[LeadHead]

Hello everyone! I'm pleased to say that we have reached the 200th TNG Caption This! And for this I have some special stuff planned.


Please read the whole first post this time, there's a lot here!

Time for some winners!

First, the "You didn't tell me about that at the proper time" Award goes to:

Wait... is that a video camera? You were going to film us?!

Next, the "Unrealistic Expectations" Award goes to:

Worf really did expect her to taste like chocolate

Next, the "Number One FTW" Award goes to:

Riker (Thinking) - Haha, I have a beautiful young woman nibbling on my neck and Troi has Worf biting off her face....

Next, the "Harry Kim Award for bad luck in love" goes to:

Christie: "Geordie, have you ever heard of the term 'Epic Fail'?"

Next, the "I always thought she looked a lot like Tasha Yar instead" Award goes to:

Data: "But I wanted the hot Russian dancer."

Our Photoshop award goes to:

GEORDI: Computer, I said "violin" not "Violent Femmes".

(Violent Femmes begin to sing)

Day after day
I will walk
And I will play
But the day after today
I will stop
And I will start

Why can't I get just one kiss?
Why can't I get just one kiss?
Believe me, there's some things that I wouldn't miss
But I look at your pants, and
I need a kiss

GEORDI: Computer end program

Why can't I get just one screw?
Why can't I get just one screw?
Believe me I know what to do
But something won't let me make love to you

GEORDI: Computer, end program

Why can't I get just one fuck?
Why can't I get just one fuck?
I guess it's got something to do with luck
But I waited my whole life for just one...

GEORDI (Sobbing): For god's sake end program!!!!!

And now, for the Special 200th Contest, we have 2 special things this time around.

Our First, I admit, I'm borrowing an idea from Rat Boy and having our top performers submit a picture for the thread and they will do the judging on them instead of yours truly.

So let me present our Top Performers, for the moment, they're nicknamed the Flagships, but I am very open to (better) suggestions on something more appropriate.

So here we go!

Nerys Myk:

Isis:

Alrik:

Jonas Grumby:

The Laughing Vulcan:

Subcomander R.:

We may have one late submission, so stay tuned!

And the second part of this 200th Special, I'm issuing a Photoshop Challenge!

What is this challenge? Okay, fine, I'll tell you.

I've been both honored and LOLed every single week by your captions and photoshops, you Ladies and Gentlemen are an amazing group, and any great group deserves a proper picture, so it's the "Class Picture" Challenge. Since most if not all of us have Avatars here, I think some way that combines them and combines them with a TNG picture should be the basis. However, feel free to go in your own direction on this.

And now, lets get this 200th Contest started...

 

[LeadHead]

Man in the dress: At least they didn't make me wear the nylons.

Data: Don't you think it's a bad idea to be alone with me, since I stabbed you earlier in the episode?

Picard: (thinking) Q, if you're listening, PLEASE help me out here!

Riker: The viewscreen is over here Sir.

Picard: Oh, there it is!

Lwaxana: Little one, I have planned you the best birthday party...

Troi: You won't be there?

Dathan: Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra!

Picard: Gesundheit.

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Crusher: "No, it's not a problem! Jean Luc and I are just friends! I think it's great you two are dating!"
Vash: "You know I'm f**king his brains out every night, right?"
Crusher: "BITCH!!!"

 

[Skywalker]

Crusher: "No, it's not a problem! Jean Luc and I are just friends! I think it's great you two are dating!"
Vash: "You know I'm f**king his brains out every night, right?"
Crusher: "BITCH!!!"

Picard: "Now, ladies, there's no need for all this hostility. Let's just all try and relax. How about a little music? Computer, run audio program Picard Three-Alpha."
Computer: ♫ I've been really tryin', baby... Tryin' to hold back this feelin' for so long... ♫

 

[BlobVanDam]

Guy (thinking to self) - Don't be embarrassed. You'll be lucky if this even ends up on screen. And if it does, who is even going to notice? It's not like people will still remember this in 20 years. You will not become "that guy in a dress"!

Picard (thinking to self) - I have half a mind to fly this ship to the neutral zone, bust out some Romulan Ale to get these ladies plastered, put something sexy on the big screen TV, and see where the night leads..........

Riker - Sir, have you shrunk? I can see my face in your chrome dome.

Lwaxanna - They say that if you want to know how a woman will look in 30 years, just look at her mother........Deanna, is that a tear in your eye?

 

[Capt_Pickirk]

Guy in the dress: Man, This costume sucks!! Do I really have to wear this Gene??

Gene Roddenberry (o.s): Shut up, and be progressive you!!!!

 

[ToMaHaKeR]

Picard: ''#1, did my facelift really gone wrong that much?''
Riker: ''Permission to speak freely, sir?''
Picard: ''Oh god...''
Riker: ''Sir, you looked way better while you were assimilated...''

RedSkirt™ (to himself): ''Walk faster, the viewers won't notice it... Walk faster, the viewers won't notice it... Walk faster, the viewers won't notice it... WALK FASTER, GOD DAMN IT!!!''

 

[Finn]

The poor guy: "I"m glad I remembered to shave my legs this morning"

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

McRedskirt: "Whose crazy idea was it to integrate the kilt into the uniform?"

Troi: "It's juvenile college humour, but a guy drills a hole in the bottom of the tray, and sticks..."
Data: "But mine is detachable."
Troi: "That's a whole other level of humour there. So forget the hole in the tray."

Crusher: "Hide your erection all you want, Jean Luc. This isn't going to turn into a threesome."
Picard: "Merde!"

Picard's years as a hobbit were left out of the history books."

Lwaxana: "You won't believe who among the bridge crew was imagining the two of us with him in a threesome?"
Troi: "I hate telepathy."

Dathan: "Mubarak, when the shoes struck."

 

[Finn]

Picard: *thinking* (Jack Crusher's voice, circa 2346; mess hall aboard the Stargazer)

Jack: Did I tell you Bev met Janie last month?
Picard: Your ex from your Starfleet Academy days? I don't think so
Jack: Yeah..her. We bumped into her at the spa in San Jose
Picard: And?
Jack: They really went at it! First, it was a nice lunch. Then it was claws everywhere! That Bev is something!

Picard: (present day) *smirks*

 

[Holdfast]

First, the "You didn't tell me about that at the proper time" Award goes to Holdfast.

Yay! I won one! Thank you.

Junya Watanabe's 24th century-inspired catwalk collection was not well received.

The crew couldn't tell whether Riker had grown, or Picard had shrunk.

 

[LeadHead]

Dathan: Shaka, when the economy fell.

 

[Isis]

Beverly (OS): "Tasha, don't you think you're going a little too heavy on those steroids?"

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Dathan: "Picard, my knife in his hand, he challenges the beast?"
Picard: "Dathan, my boot in his ass!"

Assistant Director (whispering to colleague, OS): "Heh! He's my neighbor. He's been bugging me for years to get him a walk-on on a TV show. Maybe this will finally shut him up!"

 

[6079SmithW]

Picard (stops and cringes): Numbah One, did you make a numbah 2 in your pants?

Riker:...Yes.

 

[LeadHead]

We've got one extra picture to add to the mix,

This one is from Rat Boy:

 

[LeadHead]

Kurn: What are our options?

Worf: Not much, we're relying of Bird Of Prey footage from The Voyage Home in this episode.

 

[Subcommander R.]

Man: Crap. I knew I shouldn't have bet on the Steelers...

Troi: I baked you a cake, but I eated it.

Silently, Picard waited for one of the women to make the first move.

Riker: My God, would you look at that?

Picard: I don't see anything...

Lwaxana: Deanna, I can't believe you set me up on a holodeck date with Rick Astley. What did you call it?

Deanna (thinking): Rick Roll'd.

Kurn: You call that a half time show?

Worf: It was still better than Christina Aguilera singing.

 

[Shon T'Hara]

Kurn: DJ Worf, kick it with the hot jams.
DJ Worf: Any ladies in the house, stand up and say, "Mogh!"

 

[Alrik]

Thanks for the Win LH! And thanks for the opportunity to participate in the 200th gala!

Lady on right (whispering): "Those boots look silly with that skirt."
Lady on left (whispering); "Totally. I'd have gone with pumps myself."
Lady on right: "And maybe a little 'bling'."

Data: "You baked a cake in my image?"

Deanna: "And it's anatomically correct."

Date: "???"

Deanna: "Let's just say that Tasha and I were 'close'."

Beverly: "...and he snores like a chainsaw."

Vash: "Tell me about it."

Picard: "Um, standing right here."

Picard: "Wil, I think you should turn Q down, these powers are starting to give you a big head."

Deanna: "Maybe if you gave me some space mother. I just feels like you're always looking ove my shoulder."

Kurn: "You may be the elder brother Worf, but on this ship I am Captain. Now for the last time, fetch me my house coat and slippers."