The Next Star Trek Series (Post Dis) Will Be So Dark That...

Discussion in 'Future of Trek' started by Search4, Oct 13, 2017.

  1. Search4

    Search4 Captain Captain

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    ... Your thoughts please...


    - Only 1 pixel on the screen will be lit, but it will move around a little.
     
  2. The Old Mixer

    The Old Mixer Goo goo goo joob Moderator

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  3. USS Triumphant

    USS Triumphant Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Captain Lorca would be quite comfortable? :vulcan:
     
  4. Tim Thomason

    Tim Thomason Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

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    It'll be so dark that...
    - the entire crew is killed every episode (making it technically an anthology series).
    - one of the crew is a serial killer in his spare time, but it's okay, because people accept his choices in the future.
    - money no longer exists. Instead, people barter with slaves and organs.
    - billions of people die in an episode, and the Captain ends the adventure on a bad joke. Oh, that already happened.
     
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  5. Bry_Sinclair

    Bry_Sinclair Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    ...not even JJ's lens flares will be able to illuminate the inky blackness that will consume Trek.
     
  6. King Daniel Beyond

    King Daniel Beyond Admiral Admiral

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    ...we find out the captain killed his entire last crew before being assigned to the hero ship.

    Oh wait.
     
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  7. SpocksOddSocks

    SpocksOddSocks Captain Captain

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    ... that people will attempt to escape to the mirror universe en masse.
     
  8. WarpTenLizard

    WarpTenLizard Commander Red Shirt

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    ....it will be directed by the people who made "Hobo With A Shotgun."
     
  9. Wadjda

    Wadjda Commander Red Shirt

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    As a yet undiscovered series made only for Saudi royalty, filled with incest, murder and rape.

    People are so dramatic about Discovery...
     
  10. C.E. Evans

    C.E. Evans Admiral Admiral

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    VIEWER 1: Dude, I totally love this new Star Trek series. It's so dark. The characters are so gritty. It's deep and complex and adult. Blows every other previous Trek series out the water...

    VIEWER 2: (squinting) All I see is a black screen...

    VIEWER 1: Yeah, man, isn't it the greatest?
     
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  11. Wadjda

    Wadjda Commander Red Shirt

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    If it sells...
     
  12. Herkimer Jitty

    Herkimer Jitty Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    It will be so dark that it'll ruin Gene's Vision™, that's for gosh-heckin-hell sure.
     
  13. Vger23

    Vger23 Commodore Commodore

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    ...it will actually be popular and interesting to watch.
     
  14. 137th Gebirg

    137th Gebirg Vice Admiral Premium Member

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    If the writing is good and it's done right... :D
     
  15. OldTrekker719

    OldTrekker719 Ensign Red Shirt

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    ...That it will be filmed inside the event horizon of a Black Hole (maybe Oprah's!)
     
  16. The Old Mixer

    The Old Mixer Goo goo goo joob Moderator

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    Racism/sexism are also a good way to earn Warnings around here. I'm not going to hand out a separate Warning for this post, but you'll get one the next time you post something like this.
     
  17. OldTrekker719

    OldTrekker719 Ensign Red Shirt

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    ...DAH, COMMISAR (Don't turn around!)
     
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  18. The Old Mixer

    The Old Mixer Goo goo goo joob Moderator

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    You've already been given a friendly about disputing mod actions in-thread. Warning for Trolling. Please use your day off to reconsider either your posting habits or choice of online forum.
     
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  19. tharpdevenport

    tharpdevenport Admiral Admiral

    So dark it'll need lens flares.
     
  20. Matthew Raymond

    Matthew Raymond Captain Captain

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    It'll be so dark that...
    • ...You'll be watching it at high noon and think it's midnight.
    • ...Each series DVD will be pre-sharpened so you can slit your wrists with it.
    • ...The Battlestar Galactica reboot will be appear cheerful and campy by comparison.
    • ...You'll wish it was still 2017.
    • ...Internet trolls will express heartfelt sympathy for the viewers and reevaluate their life choices.
     
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