The Last Letter - May Challenge

[captcalhoun]

July 12 1996
A’ Squadron Barracks
Banja-Luka, Bosnia

My dearest Claire,
If you’re reading this, it’s because I’ve been killed in action. For the last six months as we’ve advanced across Bosnia, I’ve been updating these letters. This will be the last, one way or the other, as we’re getting ready to [CENSORED]. If I get through this, the Balkan War will be over and we’ll have won the last of these damn Eugenics Wars, as the press like to call them. I’ll be coming home.

I can’t tell you much, of course, but I can tell you this much, Claire; I love you. I always will, you’re what kept me going through selection and you’re what’s kept me going through this last year since I got deployed here. The memories of the times we’ve had together, the thought of the times we will have. Knowing how proud of me you must be, as I know my parents are, after I got that winged dagger badge to join the SAS.

I love you Claire, I’ll see you soon

Adam

Letter passed by censor.

From: Sgt. Adam Freeman, SAS to Claire Parker.

 

[Mistral]

Ok, I just scratched "pathos" from my list of ideas. That was interesting-and without trying to be mean, I'd say it was almost too short to develop an engagement of the reader. I'd like to have seen it run a little longer and deeper-but it's still a sharp little effort.

 

[TheLoneRedshirt]

It is short, but it has the feel of urgency, like it was written on the run or in a very brief interlude between battles. I liked the [CENSORED] part - it reminded me of reading some of my Dad's old V-Mail from WWII.

 

[DavidFalkayn]

Short, sweet, yet it says volumes. Nicely done.

 

[CeJay]

Frankly I'm not sure I understand this letter.

It starts off saying that he's already dead when she'll read it but speaks of "coming back home" and "seeing her soon" later one. Either he likes playing with her or he has some sort of plans with her for the afterlife (or ... I missed something)

Otherwise a very good soldier's letter from the front lines set in a time we haven't had much exposure to.

 

[captcalhoun]

uh, yeah, i fucked up. thanks dude, NO ONE ELSE NOTICED!

 

[trampledamage]

uh, yeah, i fucked up. thanks dude, NO ONE ELSE NOTICED!

Unfortunately I did too

Also, I know I said it could be set in any time, but I did also specify Trek Universe - I'm not entirely sure if 1996 Bosnia really counts as Trek Universe.

Aside from those two points, it does work very well. It's a short letter written quickly from the battlefield, just in case he does ever need it. I can see him writing a new one of these each time he starts an engagement. The urgency of war means that you don't have time to write long letters.

 

[HyperionReborn]

uh, yeah, i fucked up. thanks dude, NO ONE ELSE NOTICED!

Unfortunately I did too

Also, I know I said it could be set in any time, but I did also specify Trek Universe - I'm not entirely sure if 1996 Bosnia really counts as Trek Universe.

Aside from those two points, it does work very well. It's a short letter written quickly from the battlefield, just in case he does ever need it. I can see him writing a new one of these each time he starts an engagement. The urgency of war means that you don't have time to write long letters.

In his defense he did mention the Eugenics Wars...

 

[trampledamage]

Are they meant to have occurred in 1996?

 

[captcalhoun]

according to the Okuda's chronology they ended in 1996

according to the article I wrote on the subject for my fan-fic they ran from 1992 to 1996

 

[Mistral]

I actually noticed that too-but what the hell, it's under extreme duress.

 

[trampledamage]

according to the Okuda's chronology they ended in 1996

according to the article I wrote on the subject for my fan-fic they ran from 1992 to 1996

okey-doke. Sorry, I had no idea they were meant to have already happened in time. I figured all of that was in the future.

 

[captcalhoun]

well, when they made Space Seed in 1966, the 1990s WERE the future!

 

[trampledamage]

well, when they made Space Seed in 1966, the 1990s WERE the future!

D'Oh! - I forgot that's where the story-line first came from!

 

[mirandafave]

Extra points for making mention of the Eugenics War me thinks! Especially in such a casual throw away line. Short and sweet the way it would be on a frontline.