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The fun thread ~ what made you laugh this week?

K'Ehleyr

K'Ehleyr

Commodore
Commodore
So I work in a golf club and Weds is 'seniors' morning. I had my back to a couple of gentlemen whilst cranking up the cappu-mocha-latte-frills and glitter coffee machine and overheard this conversation...

Senior 1: 'How was your round?'
Senior 2: 'Oh it was really good. I did a 32 on the out nine and a 34 on the back' (numbers and golfing terms may be totally made up)
Senior 1: 'Gosh, quite impressive. How did you do that?'
Senior 2: 'I wore my glasses. Never knew what a difference it would make'

:guffaw: Well it made me titter all day. Have had visions of very poorly sighted 'seniors' whacking balls about willy~nilly ever since.

Note to self ~ idea to become a millionaire: Purchase lots of glasses from £1 shop and sell to golfers at extraordinary mark up to guarantee an excellent round. Top plan! :D
 
I discovered what I call MacArthur Park Syndrome: It's that sinking feeling you get when you discover you have have created the absolutely perfect blend (chemicals, paint, liquor, cheese dip... whatever you are mixing) and you forgot to take notes. OOOOHHH NOOOOO!!!

It comes from the song lyrics from... MacArthur Park.


MacArthur Park Is Melting In The Dark
All The Sweet Green Icing Flowing Down
Someone Left The Cake Out In The Rain
I Don't Think That I Take It
It Took So Long To Make It
And I'll Never Have That Recipe Again!
OOOOH NOOOO!!!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=su3JdzUUuH4

Yes that is the same Richard Harris singing that played Dumblefuck or whatever his name was in the Potter movies.
 
I have recently rediscovered Some mothers do 'ave 'em, and have been in absolute stitches watching those back to back. I didn't remember what an acrobat Michael Crawford was!
 
Watching several students try Origami for the first time and getting frustrated. One stated, "I thought this was supposed to relax you." We all laughed, took a deep breath and tried again.
 
Ian Rankin on twitter - he's meant to be starting writing a new novel, so naturally he's doing anything but! These were a sequence of tweets of the course of a day:

Memo to @stubbleagent: the real Ian Rankin is hard at work on his novel. Twitter is being operated by one of his many research assistants.
Click to expand...

Ian Rankin's assistant had an excellent meeting with Ian's agent and enjoyed a delicious lunch at Nonna's Kitchen. Ian stayed home n worked.
Click to expand...

One of Ian's many assistants here, reminding everyone that Ian is hard at work and not lying on the sofa watching Come Dine With Me.
Click to expand...

Ian's back-shift assistant here. After an exhausting day, Ian feels the need for fresh air. He has stepped out....
Click to expand...
 
My boss got fired after getting caught stealing from his employees (myself included).

I laughed a lot. :D
 
I was in the grocery store and a few aisles away when this incident occured, but I could hear little Cody being a pain-in-the-ass to his mom...I knew his name was Cody not because I knew Cody or his mother, but because I could hear her pleading with Cody to be a good little boy while Cody was throwing a fit because Mommy wasn't kowtowing to his demands for Oreos. "Cody, sit down...No, Cody...Cody, keep your hands out of your mouth...sit DOWN, Cody!" And on and on.

Mommy apparently went into another aisle and left her cart, and Cody, in the original aisle, and in her abscence someone quickly and discreetly went up to Cody with a package of Oreos and opened it for him. I should have known something was up, for all of a sudden it was quiet and I could hear myself think as I pondered my grocery list in the blessed silence.

When his mom returned to the aisle we all knew it, for there was a loud "CODY!!! What are you doing with those cookies!", immediately followed by a quickly-shut-off protestation of innocence, followed thusly by the meaty thwack-thwack-thwack of Cody getting his little ass beaten by his pissed-off mom, the sound of Oreos cascading out of the package onto the floor, and Cody screaming like he was being flayed alive.

Now, while I don't condone child abuse in any form, I am a big proponent of public spanking if the child misbehaves. However, Cody should have gotten his butt spanked much earlier for being a little terror in public, and not because someone popped up and gave him a package of Oreos when his mom wasn't looking. As I and several others peeked around the corner of the aisle to see what the fuss was all about, I did notice that Cody would not have been in a position to reach the Oreos from his seated position in the cart.

However, I did not wish to be thought of as the architect of this nefarious scheme to give Cody some forbidden Oreos to shut the little bastard up, so I kept my own counsel. But my hat's off to the person who cleverly did that and got away with it.

If they did get away with it. When I left the store, Cody's mom was in the check-out lane a few lanes down and loudly griping to the nodding store manager about running the in-store camera surveillance tapes to see who gave her kid Oreos. I hope they charged her for the cookies.
 
A little girl at the children's centre where I work told me her mummy and daddy take bubble baths together.

Folks, if you don't know already, toddlers and preschoolers will reveal anything to anyone. My all-time favourite embarrass-your-parents story took place 10 years ago when my daughter was in preschool and a police officer came to talk to the kids. When the officer showed the kids his handcuffs a little boy yelled, "Ooh, my mummy and daddy have those!"
 
Everything my 2 y.o. daughter says, but particularly this morning when she kept repeating (for no apparent reason), "I want coconut milk, I want coconut milk."

To my knowledge, she's never had coconut milk. But it gets better.

"I'm cold, I want some hot coconut milk. I'm cold, I want some hot coconut milk. I'm cold, I want some hot coconut milk. I'm cold, I want some hot coconut milk."

I interject, "It might surprise you, but generally coconut milk is served cold. I don't think they serve it hot."

Without switching a beat, she says, "I want some cold coconut milk to keep me cold. I want some cold coconut milk to keep me cold. I want some cold coconut milk to keep me cold. I want some cold coconut milk to keep me cold...."

Had me laughing...you probably had to be there.
 
A small child with no pants on and a full diaper laughed loudly at me. I LOLed at the absurdity of the situation. Really cute kid, though.
 
:lol: Ok, we're getting there...


macloudt said:
A little girl at the children's centre where I work told me her mummy and daddy take bubble baths together.

Folks, if you don't know already, toddlers and preschoolers will reveal anything to anyone. My all-time favourite embarrass-your-parents story took place 10 years ago when my daughter was in preschool and a police officer came to talk to the kids. When the officer showed the kids his handcuffs a little boy yelled, "Ooh, my mummy and daddy have those!"
Click to expand...

When Son was 'yeah high' *holds hand out to about 3ft* his favourite film was 'Drop Dead Fred'. Copying a scene from the film whilst I was in the checkout queue of a posh garden centre, he got on the floor, shimmied under my skirt and loudly announced "Look ~ cobwebs!"
Not much you can say really!
 
K'Ehleyr said:
When Son was 'yeah high' *holds hand out to about 3ft* his favourite film was 'Drop Dead Fred'. Copying a scene from the film whilst I was in the checkout queue of a posh garden centre, he got on the floor, shimmied under my skirt and loudly announced "Look ~ cobwebs!"

Not much you can say really!
Click to expand...

:rommie: Oh, my! None of my kids have never embarrassed me in that manner but they still embarrassed in other ways. When my daughter was not yet 3 she was sitting in her pushchair in a bookshop while I was browsing in the science fiction and fantasy section. She spotted some books on the bottom shelf and the following "conversation" ensued:

Daughter: OOH, LOOK, MUMMY! TAR TREK! (we hadn't fully mastered the letter S yet)

Me, quietly: That's nice, honey.

Daughter: BUT IT'S TAR TREK, MUMMY! TAR TREK!

Me, becoming a bit embarrassed: Ok, Daughter, I've seen it. Let's keep our voices down now, OK?

Daughter: ENTERPRISE, MUMMY! ENTERPRISE!!

I couldn't see the people two aisles over, but I could hear them laughing.

At that time the BBC was showing TNG ("Look, Mummy, it's Woof!") and TOS ("Little Enterprise!") reruns, and my daughter loved them both. She rediscovered Trek 2 years ago when she watched Voyager reruns with me, though nowadays she's embarrassed to let anyone know she's a Trekkie. Oi, the irony. :rommie: My husband's also a lifelong Trekkie, but we have yet to ensnare our sons.
 
^ My daughter's been a Trekkie since about age one. According to her, though, her favorite show is Doctor Who. She likes the song.

The funniest public humiliation I've suffered at her hands is:

A few weeks ago, I took her to her swimming class (she's 2 1/2, for context) because my wife had a doctor's appointment. The class went great. In addition to the other mommies and kids, there were a lot of people in the pool for recreational swimming.

When we go to get out of the pool. She starts staring at my bare chest and mumbles, "Daddy's nupuh."

"What?"

"Daddy's nipples! Daddy's nipples! DADDY'S NIPPLES!"

Now she's pointing and getting lots of other people interested, shouting as loud as she can.

It's not like this is something we talk about a lot at home, so I don't know where it came from. I was laughing pretty hard, though.
 
Seriously, the stuff in this thread just made me laugh more than I have all week.

At work, the employee recognition cards got pulled from the bulletin board and, the same day, a rather austire note got put up repremanding folks for eating each other's lunches. I laughed at that.
 
Cheers JH, that's what we're trying to do, and need more...

Holdfast said:
K'Ehleyr said:
Senior 2: 'Oh it was really good. I did a 32 on the out nine and a 34 on the back' (numbers and golfing terms may be totally made up)
Click to expand...

I'm sure they must be! A senior recording a 66 would be one HELL of a performace. :eek: :D
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Or even 'a performance' :p

Did I not say it was crazy golf? Apparently he also got a birdie at the windmill ~ he still crows about that ;)
 
I just thought about Eugene Levy... somehow just his name and his face in my mind made me laugh.
 
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