So, My Dad Just Died.

[auntiehill]

You have my sympathies. Grief is a weird thing; it can run you over like a speeding freight train or sneak up on you, slowing spreading damage, like a house with a bad foundation. In the past three years, I've lost a family member every year. It seems like more than a decade but it's only been a few years. It changes you, and there is no telling how it that will happen or when.

 

[Nyotarules]

I grieve with Thee.


When my father died May 2016 I had been expecting it for years, he was over 80, and every time he went in and out of hospital his physical condition deteriorated. I was the responsible big sister who ran around planning the funeral, dealing with his estate (I was the executor).
On the day of the funeral I arrived at the church as right as rain, feeling fine, I walked down the aisle and it occurred to me what had happened I collapsed in the aisle with grief and would not move, I held up the whole procession! It appears I was running on adrenaline up to that day. There is no wrong way to grieve, as long no harm comes to yourself or others.
My mother died 18 years ago today, she was only 54. I miss her terribly.

 

[TribbleFeeder]

I’m so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you guys right now. I lost my dad last year, I’m here if you need to talk.

 

[Peach Wookiee]

Hugs StarMan.
I'm so sorry for your loss and know how it feels all too well. I lost my mom -- well, physically, anyway-- two years ago this past April. I'd seen her slipping away mentally before that. She was a Type 1 diabetic, and things really began to deteriorate about 12 years ago.
But even knowing that the end was coming didn't make it any easier. She was just past 67 when her body succumbed to the oblivion that her mind had already gone to.

 

[Pondwater]

I’m sorry for loss.

 

[StarMan]

Thank you everyone.

When his Dad was dying at 84 he WANTED to go. Love of his life had died a couple of years prior. Dad told his brother he had "so much more to do". The fear he was able to express before he slipped is what haunts me.

The thing that really knocks you over is that even if they're not always present in your life every day they are a premused constant. The sun rising, the stars being out. Breathing. Just there.Their complete removal from your life is something I couldn't have prepared for.

Thanks again everyone.

 

[Kor]

I'm really sorry for your loss, StarMan.

Kor

 

[Silvercrest]

My condolences, StarMan. I hope you can process this and work it out. My mother died 18 years ago at age 54 (what's up with that, Nyotarules??) and I never really processed it at all. It was like this big open wound that I carried around for years. It finally only scarred over in the last few years due to some worse things happening, which I've related elsewhere. I would hate to see anyone else go through that.

 

[USS Triumphant]

I have a belief about the nature of the universe that might make you feel a little better - but only if you believed it, and otherwise it might come off as trite. So I'll keep it to myself, and simply tell you that you have my deep sympathies, and no, there's not a thing wrong with you sharing this here.

 

[Australis]

Deep sympathies on your loss, mate. My Dad passed a month before he became a great-grandad, he was tickled pink at the news, so at least he could take that with him. Most of the time it's good memories, but sometimes one memory or another will slap me and tears come. That'll happen, it's okay.

 

[Gary7]

Just saw this now. Very sorry to hear of your father's passing. My condolences, @StarMan

 

[Spaceman Spiff]

I'm very sorry for your loss, StarMan.

This type of unexpected loss is strange and difficult to process. You have my best wishes.