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Pitch good episodes badly

CRM-114

Captain
Captain
How poorly can you sell the idea for any of Star Trek's best episodes? As an example:

The City on the Edge of Forever:
Kirk romances a woman from the past, but her sudden and brief interest in pickup trucks ruins things.
 
Sorry to double post..
Mudd’s Women:The Enterprise crew assist a people trafficker offload his drugged up “merchandise”.
 
The Gift (VOY)
Let's ditch Jennifer Lien and replace her with that borg actor with the big boobies, we'll get rid of the borg makeup and stick her in a catsuit so our prefered demographic can perv at her body!
 
The Royale (TNG)
Any accurate description of the episode.

The Ensigns Of Command (TNG)
Picard cleverly invokes obscure legal technicalities to delay a sludge creature.
 
Doomsday Machine.

A deadly space turd is going around stinking up the universe and destroying planets. The enterprise, unable to flush it themselves, enlist / have forced upon them the help of a mad man.
 
The Best of Both Worlds -
While a jealous Riker undergoes a midlife crisis brought on by an ambitious young rival, Picard and Data defeat space zombies in a Rubik's Cube by putting them to sleep.

Silicon Avatar -
A giant binge eating chandelier goes rogue, and only the crew of the Enterprise can talk it down from its next meal. But a Doctor with a secret agenda has her own crystal method to deal with the crisis.

Journey's End -
AKA - Dances With Wesley
AKA - eX-Starfleet - Origins: Chakotay
While Picard stresses over some unfortunate Ancestry.com results, Wesley plays a kickass game of freeze tag. Also, an old Traveler secretly lies and poses as someone else to convince a young man to leave his school and family to take a trip with him.

Conspiracy -
A captain's reunion at the Dytallix-B Red Lobster ends badly when the lobsters decide to fight back.
 
The Drumhead

A haugty school marm with no friends shows up on the Enterprise to find out why some part of the dilithium thingy blew up. Proceeds to alienate everyone and then has a mental breakdown when Picard uses some world star level speechifying to shut her up. Also Worf almost kills a bitchy betazoid who is not Deanna Troi when his father's honour is insulted, but this is after he willingly takes part in haughty school marm's inquisition.

'I'VE TAKEN DOWN BIGGER MEN THAN YOU PICAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD'
 
"Cause and Effect" -- The crew just repeats the same stuff over and over and over again. It's like Groundhog Day except they play poker and Crusher knocks over some flowers.

"Reunion" -- Worf finds out he has a kid, then gets so mad he goes out and kills someone. Picard writes him up.
 
Pen pals: Picard gets cross when he learns that Data has been in internet contact with a minor...

Samaritan snare: A bad experience leads Geordi to review his out-call policy...

Best of both worlds: Picard changes his user-handle to Locutus...
 
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