My cover of Demi Lovato's Skyscraper--for ANYONE being bullied.

[_C_]

This is the hardest video I've ever made and I want people to see it. I made this for all the people sitting in that bathroom wondering if they should take their life. I HOPE THIS MAKES THEM DECIDE NOT TO.

I've been there. I know what it's like to think I'm nothing, but I know I'm SOMEBODY, and I'm worth a lot to this world. AND SO ARE YOU.

This is what bullying can do to people. Still think it's funny?

[yt]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q8IisXDqOi0[/yt]

 

[Shatinator]

C,

This is painfully beautiful. I felt such validity in what you put together. All I kept thinking while watching is, that is doesn't need to be this way. That we are better as a people, than to treat each other the way we do. Maybe someday we'll be capable of showing it. Until that day, until we find the courage to show that humanity within ourselves, videos like this one will be needed to remind us who we could be.

Peace.

 

[Taylirious]

Great job!

I agree with Shatinator.

 

[_C_]

Thanks. I totally agree. My hair was wet when I tried to take my life because three girls shoved my face in a toilet and sat on my head. They wanted to drown me, and only stopped because a teacher heard the noise and came to see why there was so much laughter. They said I got sick and they were checking on me. I went with it to avoid further conflict. Then I went home and tried to do the deed.

I said to myself, "God, if you don't want me up there, make me spit these pills out."

And I sneezed. (As the video shows.)

I think God said no because I was meant to do this.

Amanda Todd started the fire for me and I've made it my mission to remind kids that they're NOT alone and that they should never suffer bullying in silence.

I went through HELL in school. I wrote it all down here: http://tiny.cc/afbv-bullyingexperiences on the page where I keep my antibullying message.

My parents were speechless when I showed this video to them. They had no idea how much I'd been hurt. I told them it wasn't their fault, that I DID NOT SPEAK OF THIS TO ANYONE for so long. Now, I feel liberated. Like I've let out an evil dark secret and it died in the light. I'm free and I hope seeing it helps someone else be free, too.

I'm not the most mature adult out there, but I see bullying as the ultimate immaturity. Adults that do it must be stuck in high school mentally. When I see kids and teens do it, I remind myself that they're reflecting their own insecurities by attacking mine or someone else's.

I don't get why it's so fun to belittle somebody to feel big. I don't sink to that level anymore. I feel better when I make someone strong by lifting them up.

So that's what I do. <3

 

[Greylock Crescent]

Thank you, C, for bravely sharing your story and your optimism. As a middle school teacher, I applaud any effort to humanize bullying (because bullying is, by definition, dehumanizing on both sides of the equation). The more light that is shed on it, on its devastating effects, the more that can be done to change the culture in the long term ... and help those in need in the short term.

 

[lurok]

Kudos for speaking out. Bullies are scum.

 

[Tosk]

I know I'm SOMEBODY, and I'm worth a lot to this world.

Most definitely.

I love this thread.

 

[Captain_Nick]

Bullying isn't funny. It's war. The thought that you nearly killed yourself because of those three slags fills me with rage. (which is odd, coz I don't know you at all)

I would have hurt those girls, badly.

 

[Captain_Nick]

That said,

I feel better when I make someone strong by lifting them up.

So that's what I do. <3

You're a better man than I.

 

[_C_]

Collingwood Nick My ovaries say thanks. (I tried to pass as a boy once, didn't work! My face is too girly girly!)

Ancient Mariner The webpage of my message is http://tiny.cc/afbv and I made it simple so it can be printed and handed out. You're welcome to print and share it with your class or give it to kids who are getting crap from their peers. That's why I made it.

Tosk Thanks Me too!

Lurok Some are. Some are kids who have a sucky home life. It's hard to judge without knowing, but there still isn't any excuse for one human being to belittle another practically to death.


I'm 33 years old, going on 34 in July, and it'll be 20 years this September since I started high school. I graduated in 1998.

I call myself a stalagmite. They are the rocky pillars that grow from cave floors as water drips and leaves behind tiny bits of minerals. I'm built out of my tears and my pain and now I'm strong. I stopped letting it make me bitter and started using it as power.

If ONE KID out there puts down the razor, the pills, the gun...if ONE KID climbs down off the bridge or off a rooftop...EVERYTHING I've been through and all I'm doing is worth it. I'll cheer and rejoice over every single person who decides to live.

It's so easy for a random person to say "oh grow a thick skin, bullying ain't that bad unless you're weak." Clearly they've never been through it. They never got told they were ugly, deformed, stupid, a disease, etc every single day of their life. When that's all you hear, you start to believe it whether you want to or not because nothing you do is good enough. I tell people who say that how they can't possibly understand.

The internet makes everything so much worse. I can BET you all a million bucks that if I was in school today, that toilet incident would be on youtube, dailymotion, vimeo, break.com, somethingawful and ebaumsworld. I was lucky that the shit I dealt with stopped when I went home. Today, kids come home after getting the crap kicked out of them(mentally, emotionally and physically), they get on the internet and they find a bunch of "kill urself" all over their facebook wall. Or they find they got mailbombed with spam. Or someone took a phone video of them getting beat up and now it's all over the web for strangers to laugh at. The poor kid can't change schools because kids in the new school might have seen the videos and it just starts all over again.

I can't fathom that pain. I don't want to. And I don't want to see bright futures extinguished because people are cruel. My voice might be lost in the sea of insults, but at least there is someone saying "PLEASE HOLD ON!" to give that kid some hope.

Here's another song I covered to spread my message. I did this back in June of last year.

[yt]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BqKwHCZRf9s[/yt]

 

[Amaris]

Stay brave, _C_. I hope you don't mind a virtual hug from me. {hug}

 

[_C_]

I love hugs *hugs back* Thanks. I try to be

 

[Captain Kathryn]

Wow, great video. I am so sorry you had to go through that. Glad you are doing better now!

I had a similar experience in school. I won't go into any of the finer details of my childhood bullying experience here, but let's just say I was bullied pretty badly. The reason it started was because my mother had cerebral palsy and kids mistook it as retardation...then I was teased about being overweight during middle/high school (which caused me to develop an eating disorder in college where I dropped about 80 lbs in 2 months). Some teachers didn't even try to stop it which made me so angry and I felt like it validated what the bullies were saying to me. It subsequently caused me to develop textbook OCD in high school (I grew out of it once I got to college) and also caused me to develop an eating disorder in college (which I do not suffer from anymore) even though it was years since the bullying ended. Then I suffered through a 7-8 year long relationship only because I didn't think anyone else would ever like me even though everything that was wrong with the situation was right in front of my face.

While I was in college...maybe about 6 or 7 years ago now...I was drinking one night. I ended up calling my high school in the middle of the night and left a raging message on their answering machine about how angry I was about how I was treated and how none of the teachers did anything about it. Apparently they were worried I was suicidal after listening to the message and the police called me...I had to go to the station to give a report. I told the detective the entire story and he said that I can go, that they won't press any harassment charges because what I went through was indeed the school's fault. They even offered me free counseling even though I was no longer going to the school. He even said that he would talk to the school regarding their bullying policy.

Looking back now that I have a job and a life so far removed from those horrible events, it's difficult to believe they affected me so much. But while you are living it, that IS your life and it's horrible. Schools need to develop a ZERO TOLERANCE for bullying. Looking back, I can't believe that my teachers allowed it. Despicable. It really messes people up well into their adult lives.

 

[_C_]

Captain Kathryn I'm sending you the biggest e-hug right now. You're a stalagmite too. Bullying is despicable. What gets me with zero tolerance is kids doing innocent things get in trouble, but the kids doing terrible things still get under the radar.

BUT you are above that now. You survived and you're strong. I'm glad you're alive. <3

 

[Captain Kathryn]

Captain Kathryn I'm sending you the biggest e-hug right now. You're a stalagmite too. Bullying is despicable. What gets me with zero tolerance is kids doing innocent things get in trouble, but the kids doing terrible things still get under the radar.

BUT you are above that now. You survived and you're strong. I'm glad you're alive. <3

Thanks, hugs to you too!

I will say thankfully I was never suicidal because of it but I know many kids and teens are and that saddens me so much. I was always just waiting for the day when I would be done with school and it would be over. That was a long time ago now though and I am over it.

Best of luck to you!

 

[RJDiogenes]

Cyndi, I'm so sorry that you had to go through that. Same to everyone else who was bullied or abused.

Your video is wonderfully done. It's painful to watch, but the ending is inspiring. I'm sure most of us would like to send a message back to our younger selves.

Unfortunately, the world is full of weak people who can only find the illusion of strength at the expense of others. This is not limited to childhood bullying, but permeates our entire culture at every level of society and politics. The strong people are the ones-- like you-- who endure and thrive, and reach out to help rather than hurt.

The Internet may make it worse, but it can also make it better. Forums and blogs like yours provide a new way to create communities where people who feel isolated can go for friendship and companionship and support. Nobody should be bullied and nobody should feel like they are alone. Your efforts will help a lot of people.

 

[_C_]

Thank you. I do have a tumblr full of my positivity and some fandom stuff over at http://butterflyinthewell.tumblr.com

I suppose the only reason I haven't gotten stupid anon hate is they know how stupid they'll look trying to attack me. I guess by changing how I see the world, I'm changing the vibes I give out and I don't attract that kind of crap anymore. *knocks on wood* Even if I did, I'll take great joy in hitting the trash can icon and putting the trash where it goes.

The video was so hard, but I'm proud of it. I'm proud that I brought light to something people hide away in shame. Maybe it'll make people WAKE UP and realize bullying can KILL.

Thanks again. ^^V

 

[RJDiogenes]

You're welcome. That's a nice blog you have at Tumblr. I'm following you now, and I'm under the name Trunkards there, which is the name of my web comic.