If programming languages were religions

[Neroon]

Well, so this may well be true in real life. Nevertheless, check out this list.

I'm positive there are other programmers out here who will get a solid laugh or two out of this list. My personal favorites are:

"COBOL would be Ancient Paganism - There was once a time when it ruled over a vast region and was important, but nowadays it's almost dead, for the good of us all. Although many were scarred by the rituals demanded by its deities, there are some who insist on keeping it alive even today."

and

"Visual Basic would be Satanism - Except that you don't REALLY need to sell your soul to be a Satanist..."

 

[Nerys Ghemor]

Oh, man...the COBOL/Kobol jokes are just too easy...

 

[Robert Maxwell]

I love the one for Python (my favorite language):

Python would be Humanism: It's simple, unrestrictive, and all you need to follow it is common sense. Many of the followers claim to feel relieved from all the burden imposed by other languages, and that they have rediscovered the joy of programming. There are some who say that it is a form of pseudo-code.

Perl is also very appropriate:

Perl would be Voodoo - An incomprehensible series of arcane incantations that involve the blood of goats and permanently corrupt your soul. Often used when your boss requires you to do an urgent task at 21:00 on friday night.

I would add another one: MUMPS would be a Greek mystery religion. If you know MUMPS, you know it, and people who don't simply can't understand. Ever. It is esoteric, known only to the few--the initiated, the learned. And nobody else really gives a damn, because they've never even heard of it.

 

[Lindley]

Quite apt in most cases.

 

[Argus Skyhawk]

Yep, I got a kick out of that list. Thanks for the link.

 

[BCI]

I learned two languages in school, both of which are not on that list...

 

[CuttingEdge100]

That was a very good bit

 

[Brolan]

COBOL is far from dead or unimportant. There are millions of lines of COBOL code in use by major corporations today.

 

[GalaxyX]

I love the connection between C and Java, it's so true lol