Re: If not alien superpowers, what did they'all think Clark's secret w
Clark is an outsider. A dweeb. Geek. Stalker boy in the shadows who can't string two words together in front of any girl other than Chloe, but he decides that he must be dramatically and romantically in love with the ultimately unavailable queen of the Cheerleaders who is dating the indomitable king of the football "squad"... Come on. It was never supposed to happen and never could have happened and Clark was wasting his life mooning on about her while he was ignoring Chloe who was positively dripping at the thought of him wrapping his manly arms around her in loves tight embrace.
Clark didn't tell Chloe that he wanted to bone young Lana, he constantly claimed that he wanted to walk on the beach and read her poetry and treat her like a princess and... She was a fantasy at best and an excuse at worst... "I don't have to take a trip down to vagina town because I'm saving myself for that special someone that doesn't know I exist or care for me in the slightest who I would never dare approach.... because I get butterflies and almost vomit whenever I get within twelve feet of her."
can he hear Kryptonite by the way? that noise we hear when it starts glowing more when he's close? Did he spend years thinking he could hear "music" when ever Lana walked into a room?
Oh, did I for get to mention that Clark spent the first 16 years of his life mistaking Kryptonite poisoning for the sensations of romantic love with a female? I know "love hurts", the Curie's probably had the hottest sex ever in their final days as radium exposure melted their insides, but Pavlov's dong, what more could train someone to be an errotomasochist than: pain = love = erection? It's just an accident that after 16 years of not seeing a nugget of this green shit, that week in week out terminal lumps of this murderous love surrogate is stuck close by him if not even between his nipples? Kryptonite is his porn, he associates it with being in love with lana or vice versus, and it is Chloe who saves him from near death every weak "tossing" that crap to onside deflating his manhood in the process, she kills his erections and he cannot forgive her for constantly uninspiring his genitals, and you'd be a fool and a communist to disagree with me that Clark's penis loathes Chloe.
However...
If sexual thoughts about men are not painful, well, sexual thoughts about anyone who is not Lana with her kryptonite necklace is not painful, but still he insisted on being her secret lobster even though the only woman he wants to consider causes him nothing but pain... Wouldn't it just be easier if thinking about lads to the point of errection didn't feel like someone was sketching M.C. Escher labyrinths on his chest with a razor blade?
Water follows the path of least resistance. Cum too, probably.
Despite the uncontrollable heat-vision in season one, and his amnesia episodes, maybe he can only notice his emotions and bio-surges when his super powers are dampened, that "love" is only possible under the exposure of Kryptonite?
So why then after Lana got rid of the necklace? When the little girl no longer caused him pain, or weakened him to the point he could "feel" joy despite the pain, did the alien persist in this illusion that he was emotionally infatuated with "redacted psychological trigger" as he courted the her in suitably Victorian fashion, this same lady by the way who gives it not slutterly, but compared to Clark, if you persist in sex before your tenth year of marriage, you're obviously an immoral whore, easy enough to anyone else...
I'm just thinking about how quickly she and Jensen Eckles fell into each others arms. Even her courtship of Lex was, despite how long he played it cool, once she figured out what was going on and he was waiting for her, it was "game on" and with the wedding rings, babies, playing house and happily ever after.
It's taken her nearly minutes to bed any other guy other than Clark.
A strange state of affairs.
Do we think she slept with Flash Gordon before the show started?
You must remember that it was Larry Niven who said that since people lose control of their muscles during orgasm, that he'd probably powder her ribcage while blowing a load out of his penis like a shot gun propelling her separated face through the ceiling... Oh, and the Kent farm house looks like Swiss cheese from Clark playing with himself.
So it's probably a blessing he kept his lamb dagger in it's sheaf.
