I have started a new assignment, which I've been doing for two weeks now. I have to work with a lot of city boys and girls... and there are constant games of one-upmanship... who earns more, who has the better address, who's the best in the courtroom... it's just an endless daily parade, and I'm sick of it... thankfully, it will be over next week. Does anybody else have problems with dick-swinging/measuring competitions in the workplace? I feel like I'm back at school, it's ridiculous!
There's a lot less of that in software. Most people at my place of work are pulling together. There's occasionally a bit of competition if a promotion opens up, I suppose. Discussion of salaries as they relate to other members of staff, however, is strongly discouraged in our terms of employment - i.e. you can say "I don't get paid enough" but saying "I should earn more than X" is looked down upon. Not sure I like the term "dick-swinging". Women are just as prone to it as men are despite their lack of the appropriate body parts.
Definitely encountered it, I don't hang out with the 'my car is awesomer than yours!' type of crowd, and none of my friends are rich so it's usually among friends talking computers - and they can be just as competitive, shouting video card statistics at each other, fighting over the benefits of different OS's. Generally, if a group of men share a posession, job or interest, there will be some aspect of macho dick-swinging about who is faster, better, stronger. Especially if there are females around. It's standard, programmed competitive nature. It bugs me, so I tend to try and surpress it. I went to an all-boys high school, and with the girls removed from the equation there was much less of that gonig on, so I haven't grown up to tolerate it.
We don't have competitions like that where I work because they all already know I am superior in every way.
98% of the people I work with are under the age of 8. And they're generally above such pissing contests. My roommate works at one of those big, nameless Wall Street firms, and she relates tales of dick swinging from her workplace all the time. In a way, compared to 5 year-olds, adults are so immature.
I wonder if it's people in insecure jobs who indulge in it more than others? By 'insecure' I include bonus-related pay.
Yeah, Wall Street firms and their counterparts in London (where I've worked) are going to be full of that sort of attitude. It's in the nature of the people who are hired to be traders - they're competitive about everything, it's how they make money.
^ That's really interesting, and actually plays into the point I was about to make. I've mostly worked labour jobs (ie. working class) where there's a real sense of camaraderie between workers, but even when I'd be in charge of a team of guys out on location, most of whom were two to three times older than me, there were never any battles of ego or ill will. That said, I was the boss.
Yeah, there's a lot of that in the unemployment line. Seriously, I've only seen that behavior a few times, in upper-management, the people who think they have more money than they actually do. The real top dogs and we plebes tend to stay away from that nonsense. --Ted
Today was all about who was going on holiday where for Christmas, and who had the coolest gym membership... Lord save us.
Well, I used to work at a financial and legal publishers in Swiss Cottage, and it was very much like that. Everybody knew how much everybody else gets paid and how much their car cost cause nobody ever stops bloody talking about it in London. Thngs are very different where I live now, nobody would ever ask you how much you get paid in casual conversation at the pub or whatever, that's just plain rude.
Oh, the girls were swinging just as hard as the boys, I assure you. In fact, of the 12 people I work with on this assignment, only 2 are men! And I use the terms boys and girls loosely by the way, as the average age in that room was closer to forty. I like that you naturally assumed only men engage in this sort of behaviour... This morning, I was a captive audience to each person's rendition of how many theatre productions they attend per week... The shallowness is incredible. God grant me patience.
Luckily, I tend to work at places where most everyone is happy with who they are and what they have. Conversations about vacations, houses, cars and so forth are more about exchanging fun information rather than oneupsmanship. --Ted
Oh, yeah? Well, where I work, people are even happier with who they are and what they have. And conversations about vacations, houses, cars and so forth are always about exchanging fun information rather than oneupsmanship. So there.
No, I naturally assumed that you were suggesting that. It is kind of common around here. See the current derailment of the picture thread, for a start.
^ The picture thread has been "derailed" with, erm, actual pictures... Nothing new happening there. Your point? Let me guess, you do not approve of six-packs? I do not have them myself, I do however enjoy others who do. Do not concern yourself with being a Mary Whitehouse for tbbs. Enjoy the view, and if you don't, simply stay out of it. No one is deliberately trying to make anybody feel uncomfortable here. If you think what happens here is malicious dick-swinging, you obviously haven't seen true examples in action! Your office must be a nursery class by comparison. The tone here is quite friendly and decent. Act your age for once! TG Theodore, I agree that the tone and timing in which these things are said are important... it's always nice to hear personal information from someone who you like and are getting to know... However, the tone and currents in my latest workplace are all messed up... the atmosphere is negative and gloomy... people aren't very kind to each other. One particular guy took a special opportunity to make me appear incompetent in order to make himself look better, although it was patently obvious to everybody else that I was going about my business efficiently. The judge had to actually step in and intervene on my behalf. I guess the recession is getting to everybody! It's a pool full of sharks and I can't wait to be out of it. I have done exactly the same job in other parts of the city and country, and it is only when I work in the City of London that I come across this kind of blatent and malicious sort of dick-swinging... it's an entirely particular sort of breed who appear to be drawn to working in this part of the city, and most are extremely unpleasant and ill-mannered!