captions for the blue guy and harbinger

[pookha]

first the winner of the previous contest.

cooleddie74 said:

User fees and late fines in Starfleet were STRICT.

honorable mentions..

galleywassail said:

When Archer said he could command a starship in his sleep, he meant it.

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kegek kringle for forrest quest
gazelle boy

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Nebusj said:

Three years after the cancellation a dazed and fatigued Scott Bakula is finally discovered to have handcuffed himself to the Enterprise men's locker room shower in protest.

 

[pookha]

harbinger happened during this time of year..

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[jonnyskywatcher]

Archer has a real sleeping problem.

Reed: You may be tougher, stronger, more intelligent, and have knack for strategies, but I'm a series regular.

 

[LeadHead]

Shran: Captain, is that-
Archer: Yes Shran, that's Porthos beating My Armory Officer at Arm Wrestling.

Shran: Doesn't it suck to be a Pinkskin?
T'Pol: Doesn't it suck to Have TV antennae coming out of your head?

Becoming such a good friend of Shrans proved to be annoying for Archer, every time he and Jamel had a fight, Shran came crying to Archer.

Thanks to his friendship with Trip, Reed found out they were considering having Mayweather be the one to have the fight with Hayes. Reed showed up 3 hours early to make sure he got the extra screen time.

Hayes: It's too dangerous on this ship! I want a safer posting!
Reed: I'm sorry you're not enjoying your time here on Enterprise. A friend of mine in Hollywood is looking for someone to join the cast of a new TV show. I'm sure it's completely safe, it's called Desperate Housewives...

Phlox: Ahhh, Subcommander! I thought you'd be interested to know I've come up with a Fictional Character based on you! Vulcan Love Slave!

 

[M'Sharak]

Shran felt a sudden warm sensation on his left ankle. Porthos
would soon be in the doghouse until further notice.

 

[Nerys Myk]

Archer (snores):...Smurfs. (snores again)

T'Pol: I would advise you to keep those antennas pointed to the ceiling and away from my neckline.

 

[Nebusj]

And thank you kindly for your support this past year, by the way.

Well, it looks like someone is trying to avoid being the New Year's Kiss for Shran.

Though it takes all her Vulcanian control T'Pol resists seeing if Shran's antennas will vacuum up the salted peanuts.

``I think I'm picking up Mexico City!''

``Wait a minute -- Harpo?!''

``I know you don't have anything against me. And I don't have anything against you. But if we pretend to be at each other's throats we'll both get to appear on-screen this season, so, deal?''
``Deal.''

``Why, you were absolutely right, Commander, and I was wrong. Earthican guinea pigs don't adapt to life underwater.''

 

[cooleddie74]

And in our next exciting episode...entitled "Low Grade Narcolepsy"...

REED:"I once got smashed at a 602 Club party and cornholed lips like yours, Major..."

 

[cooleddie74]

"Would you...eh...care to feed my Pyrithean salt eel, T'Pol? She's particularly randy today for some reason, so avoid her genital fold...unless you want to spend Movie Night with a long, slimy ocean vertebrate from a distant world humping your forearm."

_

"So...just like last Tuesday night's neuropressure session with Commander Tucker, then? I can handle it."

 

[Odon]

T'POL: "Why did you wish me to report to Sickbay, Doctor?"

PHLOX: "Certain crewmembers seem to believe you're suffering a fever, Commander. They said you looked quite hot."

 

[cooleddie74]

Commander Shran's obscene and clumsy pick-up lines never failed to embarrass everyone around him...

"Who YOU calling a Limey bitch, Major? You're...

Oh. Right. You're not British.

Well...still...you're a..




You smell."

 

[cooleddie74]

"Look, Subcommander!

For once, the only worms on this ship are in this case!"

 

[Nebusj]

``Yes, Shran, but what if the children had your ears and my antennae?''

 

[ChristopherPike]

"Captain's Log: December 27, 2153. It's been a few days now since Lt. Reed and Major Hayes' began their staring competition. Doctor Phlox remains on standby with the Optrex."

Even then, Archer suspected Shran's after dinner jokes would become the stuff of legend.

Shran: "...and then I said to the Risian masseuse, 'Do you mind? That's not my antannea!'"

 

[Kegek]

pookha said:
kegek kringle for forrest quest
gazelle boy

Much thanks.

Phlox: Sometimes it seems like the only one of us Major Hayes considers competent at all is Reed.
T'Pol: Barely competent.
Phlox: Perhaps...

T'Pol: Hayes considers Reed barely competent.

Shran: Did you know that Major Hayes considers Lieutenant Reed 'barely competent'?

Shran: He must hold your weapons officer in utter contempt.

Reed: The Captain told me everything!
Hayes: Eh?

Reed: You called me a loathsome bastard who is barely competent! Those are fighting words!

 

[Gil T.Azell]

Shran: "It's my specialty, I just Move both antena in oposite directions, You'll love it!"
T-Pol: "Typical male always thinking with the wrong head., but it does sound fascinating."

 

[cooleddie74]

T'POL:"My wig is worse.

Don't even try to compete."

 

[cooleddie74]

"That had better not be YOUR disgusting urine splashing against my left leg, Pink Skin!"

Tonight on CROSSFIRE: On the left, a stick-in-the-mud MACO major who doesn't like Brits! On the right, a stick-in-the-mud Brit who doesn't like military uniforms that look like a flock of pigeons pooped all over them!

 

[jonnyskywatcher]

The sad thing is that Reed lost this fight.

 

[cooleddie74]

At least the other guy isn't Harpo.