I ran across a couple of these guys today. Uggh.
Just driving back from dropping my daughter off with her mother for Mommy's Day. Minding my own business. Having a nice morning, listening to Warp 11... and here come the Jack-offs- an older guy with a younger person on back of his bike, and a 30-ish looking guy riding solo- driving between the lanes, skipping traffic, weaving back and forth between cars. It's a bit irritating, but they turn off the road so I forget about it.
Then here they come again. They both pass me on a double-lined two lane (illegally), and then Grandpa Jack-off with his grandson on the back of the bike tries to go around the truck in front of me, who is yielding to traffic and waiting to turn right. The truck either didn't notice him (or couldn't be bothered) and they almost collide. Grandpa Jack-off has to weave wildly (but maintains control of the bike, sadly) and begins waving his arm wildly, clearly upset with the truck for daring to drive on the same road. I continue driving, pulling next to the truck as we turn on to the 4-lane.
Grandpa-Jackoff pulls behind me, now gesturing (with the hand that is apparently not needed to drive a motorcycle carrying two people) for me to move. I don't (where would I even go?), instead pacing the truck next to me until we come to a yellow light. The truck takes this opportunity to accelerate through the light before it turns red, likely to get away from these assholes, and I coast to a stop. Both motorcycles pull up next to me and I see more gesturing out of the corner of my eye, and it appears that the they are having an animated conversation. I'm still in a pretty good mood, so I turn Warp 11 up a little louder, and wait for the light to turn green. When it does, they pull ahead... which is fine because I need to be in that lane for the next turn. The solo biker starts weaving around, and Grandpa Jack-off, who I am now behind, starts hitting his breaks much earlier than he needs to as we pull up to the next light. I'm irritated now, so I break slightly later than I ought to. This irritates him further.
At the light, the solo rider drives between the cars waiting at the light, pulling to the head of the line and turning his bike sideways, straddling two lanes and looking back in our direction. I pull in the turn lane, and Grandpa Jack-off pulls-up between me and the car beside me, and begins gesturing at me and yelling something. I sigh, turn Warp 11 down and roll down my window.
Grandpa Jack-off: "Mumble, mumble, mumble, grandson on this bike!"
Me: "What?"
Grandpa Jack-off: "You're mumble, mumble keep me from pulling in front of you!"
Me: "You're between two lanes." (points at lanes)
Grandpa Jack-off: "Mumble-asshole-mumble-grandson-mumble-drive-etc"
Me: "What are you talking about?"
Grandpa Jack-off: "Let's get out of here!" (Drives away. The light is still red, but he doesn't seem concerned about that.)
Yeah, I gave him something to think about. But let's skip past my lack of witty retorts, as it was three largish bikers against one smallish Trekkie, and get right to the part where we all agree that this guy was a fucking tool, his grandsons are fucking tools, and the world will be better off when they all wind up eating out of straws.
Anyone else have asshole motorcyclist stories to share?
Just driving back from dropping my daughter off with her mother for Mommy's Day. Minding my own business. Having a nice morning, listening to Warp 11... and here come the Jack-offs- an older guy with a younger person on back of his bike, and a 30-ish looking guy riding solo- driving between the lanes, skipping traffic, weaving back and forth between cars. It's a bit irritating, but they turn off the road so I forget about it.
Then here they come again. They both pass me on a double-lined two lane (illegally), and then Grandpa Jack-off with his grandson on the back of the bike tries to go around the truck in front of me, who is yielding to traffic and waiting to turn right. The truck either didn't notice him (or couldn't be bothered) and they almost collide. Grandpa Jack-off has to weave wildly (but maintains control of the bike, sadly) and begins waving his arm wildly, clearly upset with the truck for daring to drive on the same road. I continue driving, pulling next to the truck as we turn on to the 4-lane.
Grandpa-Jackoff pulls behind me, now gesturing (with the hand that is apparently not needed to drive a motorcycle carrying two people) for me to move. I don't (where would I even go?), instead pacing the truck next to me until we come to a yellow light. The truck takes this opportunity to accelerate through the light before it turns red, likely to get away from these assholes, and I coast to a stop. Both motorcycles pull up next to me and I see more gesturing out of the corner of my eye, and it appears that the they are having an animated conversation. I'm still in a pretty good mood, so I turn Warp 11 up a little louder, and wait for the light to turn green. When it does, they pull ahead... which is fine because I need to be in that lane for the next turn. The solo biker starts weaving around, and Grandpa Jack-off, who I am now behind, starts hitting his breaks much earlier than he needs to as we pull up to the next light. I'm irritated now, so I break slightly later than I ought to. This irritates him further.
At the light, the solo rider drives between the cars waiting at the light, pulling to the head of the line and turning his bike sideways, straddling two lanes and looking back in our direction. I pull in the turn lane, and Grandpa Jack-off pulls-up between me and the car beside me, and begins gesturing at me and yelling something. I sigh, turn Warp 11 down and roll down my window.
Grandpa Jack-off: "Mumble, mumble, mumble, grandson on this bike!"
Me: "What?"
Grandpa Jack-off: "You're mumble, mumble keep me from pulling in front of you!"
Me: "You're between two lanes." (points at lanes)
Grandpa Jack-off: "Mumble-asshole-mumble-grandson-mumble-drive-etc"
Me: "What are you talking about?"
Grandpa Jack-off: "Let's get out of here!" (Drives away. The light is still red, but he doesn't seem concerned about that.)
Yeah, I gave him something to think about. But let's skip past my lack of witty retorts, as it was three largish bikers against one smallish Trekkie, and get right to the part where we all agree that this guy was a fucking tool, his grandsons are fucking tools, and the world will be better off when they all wind up eating out of straws.
Anyone else have asshole motorcyclist stories to share?
