K'riq Sa
Commodore
*{ An Open Letter to Oreo Cookies }~
Dear Oreo Cookies,
c/o Nabisco Co.
Im writting this letter, mostly because I care a lot about you, and yes, I would even say I Love you, and I wanted to make sure you to heard it from me first, rather than one of those cold-hearted, backstabbing, Bitch-ass PR Firms, that you always hang out with. Why do you think I've let you be with me, my one and only, all these years, even when all the other's TV Ads laughed, and said I had outgrown you, I still consumed only you, full, or bitesize.*
But, I have thought our relationship over very carefully, and i think its time, we start seeing other cookies. Now, I know, this is gonna be just as hard for you, as it will be for me, and yes, I know this will hurt your bottom line, but I think this will end up being best, for both of us.*
First, I would like to Thank you, for all those wonderful years of special times, we shared together. (sniff) Those warm intiment moments, You, Me, that tall, cold Glass of Milk (my throat is getting dry, just thinking about you two together), and sometimes, we even shared our love for each other, with special friends (you freaky little chocolate devil, you), but it was always, you and me Kid, us, together against the consumerist, multi-media, TV commercial world. But it's over, you see, I've gone cold turkey, I've given up High Fructose Corn Syrup, yes, yes, I know, you're full of it, and that being the case, any kind of gastronomical affair with you, is totally out of the question. As much, as I would like too, I can't buy into your crazy, out of control, Drug use any longer, my body just can't take the abuse anymore. They say, things and people, can always change, but I don't think you can, or will, theres no profit in it, and you say, it would cost you to much, well personally, I don't think I will either, so I think this is it. I know, deep down inside, I will never, ever find another cookie to replace you, face it, another sugar-based you, just doesn't exist, and anything else, would just be, generic. In fact, I won't even try, and anyway, l'm into those cute little Banana Muffin twins packs now, besides, when i turn those babies over, and check their labels, they come organic.
And don't even try, and entice me back, with those naughty, suggestive, special, low-price, coupon sales tactics, it won't work anymore, it's over, and if by chance, we happen to see each other, in some dark, and seedy Snack Food isle somewhere, or Von's, or even high priced, ass Ralph's, let's just pretend we never met, just pass each other, no words, no remorse.
Remember, we will always be, BFF's forever. Good-bye and Good luck...
you're bestest pal,
K'riq Sa
Dear Oreo Cookies,
c/o Nabisco Co.
Im writting this letter, mostly because I care a lot about you, and yes, I would even say I Love you, and I wanted to make sure you to heard it from me first, rather than one of those cold-hearted, backstabbing, Bitch-ass PR Firms, that you always hang out with. Why do you think I've let you be with me, my one and only, all these years, even when all the other's TV Ads laughed, and said I had outgrown you, I still consumed only you, full, or bitesize.*
But, I have thought our relationship over very carefully, and i think its time, we start seeing other cookies. Now, I know, this is gonna be just as hard for you, as it will be for me, and yes, I know this will hurt your bottom line, but I think this will end up being best, for both of us.*
First, I would like to Thank you, for all those wonderful years of special times, we shared together. (sniff) Those warm intiment moments, You, Me, that tall, cold Glass of Milk (my throat is getting dry, just thinking about you two together), and sometimes, we even shared our love for each other, with special friends (you freaky little chocolate devil, you), but it was always, you and me Kid, us, together against the consumerist, multi-media, TV commercial world. But it's over, you see, I've gone cold turkey, I've given up High Fructose Corn Syrup, yes, yes, I know, you're full of it, and that being the case, any kind of gastronomical affair with you, is totally out of the question. As much, as I would like too, I can't buy into your crazy, out of control, Drug use any longer, my body just can't take the abuse anymore. They say, things and people, can always change, but I don't think you can, or will, theres no profit in it, and you say, it would cost you to much, well personally, I don't think I will either, so I think this is it. I know, deep down inside, I will never, ever find another cookie to replace you, face it, another sugar-based you, just doesn't exist, and anything else, would just be, generic. In fact, I won't even try, and anyway, l'm into those cute little Banana Muffin twins packs now, besides, when i turn those babies over, and check their labels, they come organic.
And don't even try, and entice me back, with those naughty, suggestive, special, low-price, coupon sales tactics, it won't work anymore, it's over, and if by chance, we happen to see each other, in some dark, and seedy Snack Food isle somewhere, or Von's, or even high priced, ass Ralph's, let's just pretend we never met, just pass each other, no words, no remorse.
Remember, we will always be, BFF's forever. Good-bye and Good luck...
you're bestest pal,
K'riq Sa
