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It's the reverse Pottery Barn rule, 'I break it and you keep buying it.' I've lived through the dead decades of the Ben-gals so I feel your pain as a fellow fan-atic.
I fully understand that, my attitude was OK get the fuck out and let me be for awhile to process, we can laugh about the old times later. Relatives can be more hurt than help during those times.
My Mom is closing in on 90 years and I know it can happen any day but knowing she has lived a full life won't make it any easier when that day comes.
My condolences and the only thing I can suggest is to remember the good times like I did when Dad passed.