TNG Caption This! 276: Sins of the Blu-ray

My Two Dads: The Next Generation



Kurn: Mr. Data, my eyes are up here...



Worst staring contest, ever!



Ooh, it says here they're making an announcement about LCARS 10.2 next week!



The rules of So You Think You Can Dance are a little different on Qo'noS.

 

Worf: *thinking* I won't face him here. I will take the turd down when we are in a little room in some deep space station some years down the road.

 

Transporter Tech: "Well...that would explain all these weird assignments I've been getting, like 'engineering assistant' and 'transporter tech'... Are you sure Command is red?"
Riker: "Yes! For about the past eighty years!"
Picard: "Let me get this straight. When your Starfleet Academy advisor asked what career path you wanted to pursue, you just said 'the gold one'?"

 

As you can see Sir, the centre and front right audio channels are identical.

 

Worf: You are cowards and traitors and one day I shall have my honour back, and you will all find that to be a very good day to die!

*Stomps Out*



*Pokes Head Back In*

Err... Has anyone seen my sash? Duras threw it on the floor earlier...

Klingon: Ah, here it is, a little dirty I'm afraid.

Worf: Thanks, that'll clean out so don't worry.


Oh, and yeah, you're all lucky I do not kill you where you stand!

 

TSA Agent: "Please remove your shoes and belt and place all personal belongings in the tray."

Picard: "Ohh for the love of... Ma'am We're really in a hurry. We have an appointment with Admiral Nechayev at 13:00!"

TSA Agent: "We'll be through very soon, I.... hmm... Sir can you come with me please?"

Picard: "Wha... W... You... Jesus, what now?"

Riker: "I told you we should have gotten here earlier..."

 

DATA: That Johnny guy is flaming Worf on the FleetBBS again.

RIKER: Heh, this is great. "Worf is a fanny head who couldn't fight his way out of a paper bag."

GEORDI: "Worf's hit the deck so often the floor has dents that match his forehead."



PICARD: Looks like you've been trolled again, Mr Worf. This isn't a surprise birthday party.



PICARD: Sorry Mr Worf. Who ever this "LuckyJohnnyP" person is, he's covered his tracks quite well.

 

Picard: Ensign, take off your uniform!
Ensign: Sir?
Riker: Are you questioning the captain's order?
Ensign: No, no!
Riker: You want to take in turns or shall we do it together Jean-Luc?
Picard: In turns, and remember ensign if you breathe one word I'll be sure to file charges of treason against you!


Kurn: Captain, request permission to execute acting ensign Wesley Crusher.
Picard: Permission granted, dispose of the boy in any manner you see fit.


Picard: Tea Mr Worf?
Worf: I decline, it gives me indigestion.
Picard: With mint frosting?
Worf: Agreed.


Gowron: With this bloo ray vision my staring eyes only stare the more harder!

 

Dr. Zoidberg, off screen: YOUR SINGING IS BAD AND YOU SHOULD FEEL BAD!

 

Data: "Search complete, sir. There are 16,492 fanfics in which Dr. Crusher and Counselor Troi end up in bed together."
Riker: "Christ! That many?! Is there any way to filter them by quality?"

 

Data: "Yes, Sir. Computer, remove all fanfics including Commander Riker"

 

Riker: "Yes Chief, your testicles are quite impressive, however you're on duty and really need to put them away."

 

Female Maitre D': "No, Gentlemen, I can't give you a table just because you're fellow Starfleet officers. Here at the Stinking Gorn, it's 'reservation only.'"

 

Data: "You are flying low sir"
Wesley: (Thinking) "Don't look, don't look, don't look"

 

Picard: "Mr Worf, you call this a party? This is a complete sausagefest. I'm going back to the ship."

 

Kurn: "Are you questioning my honor?"
Data: "Not at all. I believe the nipple clamps make a strong fashion statement."
Wesley: "They really work for you *gulp* Sir."

 

Data: Balls.

 

Picard:*Sigh* Mr. Worf, once again, when Kurn taps your head and says 'Goose', you give chase around the circle. You do not run to the middle. Understood?

Worf: Yes, sir.

 

Wesley: "They can't be real."

Data: "But they are spectacular."

 

Kurn: "The Enterprise put a huge dent in my shuttle. Who was driving yesterday? And I have it on good authority you can't pin it on Deanna Troi this time."

Wesley (to self): "Note to self. In the future, no driving the ship when Counselor Troi is away visiting her mother."