Data Put-Downs.

Let's face it. Data is the master of the p0wn.

From "Measure of a Man"

 

I've always been partial to this line from the third season's 'The Ensigns of Command"

Data: "I could reduce this pumping station to a pile of debris...but I trust my point is clear. I am one android with a single weapon. There are hundreds of Sheliak on the way... and their weapons are far more powerful. And the Sheliak may not even offer you a target. They can obliterate this colony from orbit. You will die never having seen the faces of your killers."

Warmest Wishes,
Whoa Nellie

 

"You seem to have an aversion to orderliness."

 

Data: "Does the Admiral have children, Sir?"
Picard: "I believe he does. Why?"
Data: "I am forced to wonder how much experience he had as a parent when his first child was born."

 

Another favorite of mine.

 

Most of the stuff he said to Hobson in "Redemption", heck every last word he said to Hobson.

 

I don't recall this. What episode was this?

 

Offspring. (Where Data builds a daughter and a SF Admiral comes to take her away.)

 

The Offspring.

From Deja Q:

Q: "Who does he think he is, giving me orders like that!"
Data: "Geordi thinks he is in command here. And he is correct."

 

Speaking to Dr. Marr after she had just destroyed the Crystalline Entity

and

"Resistance is futile!"

 

"Could you please continue the petty bickering?"

 

Yes! That one is my favorite too. With these put down threads I'm surprised no one has made a Q put downs thread yet, btw. He would definitely win.

 

Data always made me laugh. The funniest thing was the way Brent made those quizzical faces like a dog makes when you say something they don't understand. Like "Wha?"

 

Forces of Nature (The ONLY good part in the whole thing.) When Geordi recommends phasering Spot as a training method for keeping her off the console.

Data: Geordi.....I cannot shoot my cat...

 

From Time's Arrow I think...

Riker: It's just that our mental pathways have become accustomed to your sensory input patterns.

Data: I understand. I am also fond of you, Commander. And you as well, Counselor.

 

I'll have to look that one up.

 

Neither of these probably count, but for moments where Data dishes out a big bowl of pwn, I'd say:
1: grabbing a Borg by the throat and saying through clenched teeth "Stop... stop it... STOP.. STOP IT!" has got to be on the list?

2: Insurrection, Riker's just shaved off his beard. "Smooth as an android's bottom, eh Data?"
Data strokes it, thinks about it, shakes his head and walks off

 

Yeah, and his Poker face is a comedy classic.