What do you call an eccentric Ferengi? Quarky. Who is the Visitor at the door? It's Nana. How did the shapeshifter from the gamma quadrant find out how far he travelled? He checked his ODOmeter.
Rumor has it that Michelle Forbes turned down a role in Star Trek V's campfire scene. Why? Because she didn't want to sing "Ro Ro Ro your boat". Riker was so good at poker, that he kept a count of his Number Won. Why did Kirk rush to save his favorite yeoman? Because this particular Yeoman Rand into trouble. For his first cooking lesson, what did Sisko teach his son? He showed him how to Jake and bake. Maybe I don't have a touch for this pun stuff. Were those pon farr from being funny?
Why was Nerys saddened when the shapeshifter departed DS9? Because she Kira lot about Odo. What did the witness say that led Starfleet security to arrest the former captain of the refit Enterprise for the crime of punching Ilia in the face? The witness told security, "I saw Will deck 'er." Not many people are aware that the actor who played Dr. McCoy was an environmentalist. Back in the day, he penned an op-ed promoting protecting the environment. "Stop the Deforest" Kelley wrote. Jadzia was smiling after her medical checkup at sickbay. Why? Because she was Trill that Dax was given a clean bill of health. I hope you enjoyed reading these puns. If not, I am sorry that I Borg you.
Captain Picard reprimanded his transporter chief, O'Brien, once. What did O'Brien do wrong? He transported Picard to the wrong beam down coordinates. O'Brien was off target by Miles. At least his wife loved him, remember Keiko wasn't fooled by the fake O'Brien in "Whispers", she was able to spot the phony O'Brien from Miles away. Why were the children who played Molly and Kirayoshi O'Brien so fond of the man who played their t.v. dad? Because whenever he was around the kids, he was always cool and Colm and was never a Meaney. But I suppose when Colm disciplines his real kids, they are going to say "Daddy is a Meaney." The Klingons were so ashamed that Voq took on human form that they don't discuss it with outsiders. How did the Klingons treat Voq's legacy? They consigned Voq to the Ash heap of Klingon history. Why was Georgiou disappointed that Michael didn't detonate the bomb and ignite the Klingon homeworld into a ball of fire? Because she wanted to see Michael Burnham all. What did T'Pring's astonished lover say to her after Spock killed Captain Kirk during the Vulcan marriage ritual? "I cannot believe that things worked out as planned. I am truly Stonn-ed." And what was his favorite phaser setting? Stun. What is it called when Spock engages in time travel shenanigans? Running Amok Time.
In one of the few Romulan episodes of TOS, we saw Kirk steal a Romulan cloaking machine. While Kirk resorted to outright thief to obtain a Romulan cloaking device, years earlier the Klingons themselves had gotten hold of the same Romulan technology. However, they did so through business dealing and trade. Klingon cruisers for Romulan cloak. Too bad we didn't get to actually see that commercial transaction. That unseen episode of Trek history, by the way, was known as the "free Enterprise Incident". Speaking of Romulans, what is the best synopsis of Star Trek 09's villain? He was Nero minded in his obsession with destroying Vulcan. In the latest ST short treks, Harry Mudd sure fooled that bounty hunter. It was hilarious that the alien couldn't Tellarite Mudd from the wrong Mudd.
What villain from Star Trek would give Batman '66 the creeps? The Archer, now promoted Captain in a unique crossover between two beloved '60s shows.
What does Deanna do when she doesn't succeed? Troi again Is someone who goes to see your grandmother a Nana Visitor? (she must have heard that so many times) What does a ferengi duck say? Quark
"Heard about the new Klingon airline? They're called Worf Air" (warfare) Does Quark's brother store his porn on a seedy Rom? Before the federation came, Janus VI was mostly Horta-cultural
James Kirk must've followed Jackson Roykirk because he went Where Nomad Had Gone Before Would Talaxian courtship rituals include knee licks? What's Kirk's least favourite soup? The Broth of Khan
Why does Noonien Singh hate Kirk so much? - Because he Khan. If Data had to have android back surgery what would it be called? - Spiner.
Me: Hey, I've got a great knock-knock joke. You start. You: Okay. Knock knock. Me: Who's there? You: Ah ........ Me: