Contest: ENTER DS9 CapCon 155: Up Close and Personal

Sorry about vanishing, everyone, but between an abruptly non-functional PC and Irma, I've had my hands full. PC was fixed tonight, though, so I can finally browse the internet on something other than my Kindle fire!

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JirinPanthosa's "Hail to the Chief"

KLINGON: Forgive me to asking High Chencellor but which Gowron are you today? Clever scheming
politician Gowron, or insane suicidial moron Gowron?
GOWRON: I'm going to play it by ear.

Nery's Myk's "The Play's the Thing"

MARTOK: The line is "is this a dagger which I see before me".
SISKO: Are you sure?
MARTOK: It's right here in the original Klingon!

RobinSpace's "Lowered Expectations"

"I 'm rich, Jadzia! I received a subspace message that I am a descendent of a Nigerian prince. I only need a few credits from you to finalize the deal. Are you with me for an adventure of a lifetime!"

Laura Cynthia Chamber's "Hard Rations"

Martok: "And how much am I bid for this fine vintage of...pink lemonade?!"
Worf: "The war has been tough on everyone, General."

tharpdevenport's "Laugh and Die"

"I'm a Klingon and you know what I mean, and I do my little turn on the promenade. Yeeeaaahhh, on the promenade..."

And now, this week's entries!

 

Sisko: Well, lieutenant. "What's up"?


Yep, definitely left the coffee pot on.


Bashir: Right, fine. No prostate exam.


Bashir: How did the vole get IN there, Quark?


Garak: Nine hundred thousand, six-hundred and forty-eight sheep, nine hundred thousand six hundred and forty-nine sheep, nine hundred thous-

 

Sisko: It should be easier for you. Jadzia was heavier....

 

EZRI: Mental note, the symbiont is not fond of Chinese food.

 

Ezri: Stop kicking me, Jadzia, I won't reassociate with Worf.
Jadzia: Reassociate? I don't want your skanky hands touching my man!

 

Where Will You Be When You Space Diarrhea Comes Ba--

"Too late!"

 

Sisko: Old Man, aren't I meant to lie on a couch whilst you sit in a chair for my counselling session?
Dax: Well if you allocated me an office then maybe we could do that!


Ezri learned a valuable lesson: never trust a fart after having yamok sauce.


Worf: I wish I knew how to quit you!


Oo-mox orgasm face...


One's reaction after seeing the oo-mox orgasm face.

 

Oddly enough, I forgot all about that one.


Sisko: "'♩ ♪ ♫ I want to turn the whole thing upside down...♩ ♪ ♫ '"
Ezri: "I hate you."


Ezri finds out that symbionts can sneeze the hard way...


Worf: "Do NOT spell my name with an H."
Bashir (squeaky voice): "Okay!"


Bashir: "So far, I've found three Froot Loops, some glitter sparkles, an eraser that looks like a targ, a Bajoran spiny basil thorn, and the cap to a bottle of caulking foam. How long did you doze off for?"
Quark: "Only two minutes. But let me tell you, I am never, EVER babysitting that O'Brien brat again!"
Bashir: "On behalf of Yoshi and the entire family, thank you."


Bashir: "Are you all right, Garak?"
Garak: "Peachy. I'm just developing a new meme face."

 

BASHIR: That's not the Heimlich Maneuver...
WORF: It is on Qo'Nos

 

SISKO: You know just because you can stand on your head doesn't necessarily mean you can do well on Trill Ninja Warrior.
EZRI: Dax is a celebrity! They'll cast me!



SISKO: So, it actually happened when you were sliding into first?



WORF: You gave me a liter of fancy artisanal prune juice for my engagement gift!
BASHIR: What?
WORF: It was...the most thoughtful gift I've ever received!
BASHIR: ...You know you can tell me stuff without having to push me against a wall first.
WORF: NO I CAN'T!



The day Quark decided to sue Q-Tip.



GARAK: The convenience store...next to my tailor shop...needs to stop playing...BAJORAN POP MUSIC!!!!

 

"What part....of....dry clean only...don't they understand?"

 

GARAK: Odo's replacement is Constable Callahan???

 

Sisko: Say it!
Dax: No one touches your peppers!
Sisko: Louder!
Dax: NO ONE TOUCHES YOUR PEPPERS! Isn't torture against the Federation Charter?
Sisko: Wouldn't be the first time I broke it ... this week.

 

Watched an episode of "Star Trek: Discovery". It wasn't good.

 

Quark: This looked so much easier in Shrek!


Sisko: You know, Old Man, one day I won't even blink at weird behavior from you Daxes anymore.

 

SISKO: You're stuck with it, kid. It's not coming out.

 

Sisko: I warned him about eating Ghost Peppers.

 

"Quit your whining, old man. You said you'd do this for a Klondike bar."

 

Sisko: Keep complaining about me making you do this and I'll take the pillow away.



Computer: Unable to replicate the "%$&*ing A" Please restate your request.



Worf: Klingons do NOT show insurance cards!



Rom: Now, where's that reset button?



Garak: (thinking) Dang, Sisko sure hits hard.

 

Sisko: After about 40 more minutes you'll have a 'vison'.