The Enterprise Incident terrible planning

I really want to love this episode but the dreadfully silly simplicity of Kirk's plan and appallingly poor Romulan security is just so annoying. They don't raise shields, fail to detect a transporter beam, detect Spock but not Kirk's location, and don't bother having weapons ready in case Enterprise tries to escape.

I was wondering, if the story was redrafted so that the Romulans don't behave incompetently and raised their shields immediately after the prisoner transfer, can anyone think of an alternative plan that could still have netted the cloaking device?

 

Buy one on Galactic Amazon.com?

 

No good. He's spent all his galactic credits on whores from Eroticon VI. Next plan.

 

Spock's sensors can feed him information on every minute object in the quadrant. Couldn't he just scan the cloaking device and upload all of the technical details?

 

It does seem like Kirk was ordered to take the Enterprise on a mission that had no hope of succeeding unless the Romulans did everything we hoped they would, and nothing we hoped they wouldn't, and would not detect or prevent Kirk's sneaking around, which they could easily have done, and was their obvious duty. Taken at face value, Starfleet is simply handing the Enterprise over to the Romulans with no chance of ever seeing it again.

When you think about it, the only way this episode works is if the Romulan commander was a traitor working for Starfleet. And she probably needed Tal and others to cover for her wildly incautious approach to "capturing" the Enterprise. It was really just a rendezvous to hand off the cloaking device to Starfleet.

And even that doesn't explain the ruse Kirk played on his own crew, pretending to be emotionally unbalanced. As long as Spock was in on the plan, he never needed to play that silly game, which in real life would just damage his reputation among the ship's other officers.

 

I'm assuming the cloaking device is shielded even when not engaged but considering that starships contain massive power sources, it is hard to know how cloaking devices shield them from sensors. Apparently they don't mask plasma emissions after all.

 

All true but I think the ruse was a way to protect the crew from execution if captured. I think the conspiracy should have been slightly wider. I was wondering if adding a couple of extra saboteurs armed with gadgets might work.

For example, I can see that beaming over a third person at the same time as Kirk and Spock to a different location might work, burying your secret transport in with the others but they'd need to plant a device to sabotage the shields.

Disguise Yeoman Rand as a Tal Shiar agent and have her stalk the ship armed with a bomb. She's always recording stuff on her tricorder she could just take readings inside the shielded chamber.

Pulling off the theft of the device is far trickier. Removing it will be spotted by the bridge unless some sort of Indiana Jones trick can be pulled and Enterprise will be blasted to oblivion before she can warp out of disruptor range unless she pulls off the Picard Manoeuvre.

 

It's definitely an incredibly convoluted plan, relying on Spock seducing the Romulan Commander.

What if she was asexual? Or simply a little more professional? They'd be screwed.

 

How did they know the Romulan commander would be female? The Romulans were convinced of their own superiority in numbers and believed Spock's explanation that Kirk had gone mad so didn't bother with the security arrangements normally needed!
JB

 

I suppose Spock's strategy would be adjusted. The commander's goal was success and glory so she was also evaluating her strategy as she went. I think it was the telepathic snoo snoo that tipped her over into a more genuine infatuation (for both of them) but that was a calculated move by Spock. It was a game of chess for both of them. Who knows what approach a male commander would have taken. He might also have offered sexual favours (homosexual acts were common in Roman society even if full on relationships were frowned upon), commandeered a junior officer to tempt Spock, or simply appeal to his logic to spare the crew. Romulans do possess a code of honour (albeit in as much as Vulcans can't lie).

Compared to Mission Impossible, I just think their plan needed more moving parts. In fact, it might be fun to repurpose an IMF plot for Star Trek characters.

 

That would have never made it to the screen back in the sixties, Pauln6, but nowadays with Discovery coming in, who knows?
JB

 

There are some discoveries I don't want to make.

 

Two males of the same species engaging in recreational sex is far less disturbing than a male and a female of different species breeding if you think about it too hard (not a euphemism). It's as vile as a human and a chimp except at least there, they share 99.9% DNA.

If I had my way, every half-breed abomination in Trek history would be wiped out as implausible and just plain wrong, but since Trek is more enlightened than me, I am forced to accept and enjoy the notion of such things. Oh well, at least the women remain largely useless. :-/

 

The Klingons in Elaan told Kirk to surrender or be destroyed. The Romulans in EI more or less said we'll give you plenty of time to think about it.

 

Reminds me of the Benny Hill skit where he tells his doctor he is tri-sexual....if it's sexual, then he tries it.

 

Sex, in espionage, has always been used to manipulate or control. Even the James Bond movie "Skyfall" got it right (whereas audiences didn't always perceive it in the way intended by the film...) But that also has to require the other person being willing. (Again, Bond's reaction was completely in-character, to not let the baddie win - regardless of tactics used.)

Then again, as was stated earlier in the thread, the whole story does hinge on things going exactly to a plan.

Then again, it makes sense for the Romulan Commander to at least pretend (to start with) to lure Spock...

"Discovery" definitely has some opportunities. It'll be fun to see, and for $7/mo I might watch if there are enough CBS shows to make it worthwhile.

Bender the robot bought all the hookers first.

 

I'm thinking that the cloaking device must have some energy emissions of a particular pattern. Spock should be able to identify what type, therefore what device is capable of producing them. That should keep Spock busy for a few weeks or so.

 

Ok, so I think my modified plot logic would be that the Federation has technical plans of the Klingon ships and saw this knowledge as an opportunity to carry out some espionage on the Romulans. Knowing what the energy output of a standard Klingon vessel would look like, they gamble that any anomalous readings will tip them off as to the location of the cloaking device.

When Kirk and Spock beam over, a third person, a saboteur (I pick Rand because she should always have been the show's action heroine and as an homage to the Face of the Enemy, where an under-used female character got her best episode but Sulu or Chekov would work as well), is beamed over at the same time to a (presumed) secluded location on the Klingon/Romulan ship using the exchange to disguise the additional beam. That person's job is to lay charges to sabotage the shield generators. I'm picturing a scene like Helen Noel crawling through the air ducts here. Their presence can be kept secret until later in the episode.

The plan proceeds as per the episode except that Bones beams onto the Romulan ship to examine/repatriate Kirk's body. Through shenanigans, they incapacitate the Romulan medical staff, disguise themselves as per the episode, and set out to the location of the Cloaking device. They fight some guards and get overwhelmed just as Rand pops out of an air duct to zap the remaining guards.

The episode proceeds as normal, the bomb (or whatever) goes off, the shields are momentarily disabled. Our heroes activate their trackers and get beamed back to the Enterprise.

Maybe a brief special effect can be used to show that the resulting discharge of the bomb inhibits the other Romulan vessels for a split second long enough for the Enterprise to get a head start.

Admittedly, it still as cheesy as hell but does it have enough moving parts and a Mission Impossible vibe to give the episode a bit more story logic?

 

The Kirk 'death' scene was cool, but McCoy was right......Kirk was lucky that the Romulan doctor didn't perform an autopsy on him.

 

Any problematic issues with this episode can be written off as third-season weirdness.

Kor