"The Toilet King of Starfleet"

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by Jayson1, May 31, 2017.

  1. Jayson1

    Jayson1 Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Jake Hanson prided himself on his usual top notch observational skills and he found they came in handy when designing starfleet restrooms. With over 100 hundreds alien species within the Federation and 156 different species who were represented by at least one person of said species he knew as a owner of a business that did work for the Federation that specialized in creating restrooms for certain ships that he had to be very creative when finding away to get his restrooms built on ships so they would service it's crew in all the right way. He usually always made it work which is why after over 10 years in the biz that he earned the nickname "Toilet King of Starfleet."
    His latest job though was looking to be tricky. He had never gotten a profile gig as big as a flagship which is what the new Enterprise D was going to be once it was created,manned and lauched into duty. In the past Starfleet ships had basically been, submarines in space, for the most part which meant standard restroom area's, complete with mulitiple sonic showers and genetically engineered toilets that could literally modify it's shape to service any alien or human no matter how different their anatomy or waste was from each other. It was really boilerplate planning by this time but Starfleet now wanted to do something different.
    This new ship was going to be designed to be a sort of hotel in space that was created to be as much about luxuary as it was about being efficent. It was going to match up with Starfleet's new public relation efforts at selling itself as a utopia. They didn't want old fashioned restrooms on this new ship but something completely "outside of the box" that has never been seen before so of course it was up to the "Toilet KIng" to give them what they wanted.
    His first though was transportable waste that could be removed with a small transporter placed inside the quarters next to the washing area. Problem though is Starfleet ships at times get into scraps or dangers were the ships power reserves are compromised and he knew those personal transporters would be the first to go down or have power diverted from them which would create a very messy problem for people on the ship.
    He considered what Vulcans do on their vessels and give their crew disolve pills that more or less, consume the waste making it's crew accumulates leaving their bathroom time down to a trip to the main transporter room once a month but the problem was those pills were not always effective for all species and outright lethal to Bolians and Andorians.
    That was when the King got his answer! Bolians and Andorians on their ships and on their homeworlds used portable phaser adapters that they could connect with their energy weapons allowing a person to basically shoot themselves with their own personal phaser anytime they need to remove waste and it would completely be erased. The key wasn't in trying to create a new restroom but finding a way to get ride of the whole restroom concept to begin with! Sure he would have to have his engineers start finding ways to build these phaser adapters but that would proably be only a month's time of work which means they would be very ready when the Enterprise D is lauched in 6 months.
    The "Toilet KIng" sit back in his office chair and smiled. He knew he had come up with something that was going to change Starfleet forever and he also knew the days of needing a "Toilet King" were proably over but that was okay. Jake Hanson was a smart and clever guy and he knew he would find even newer challenges to look forward to.

    Jason
     
  2. Jayson1

    Jayson1 Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    I was wondering what people, think about the story? Did you like it or hate it or what?

    Jason
     
  3. Spot261

    Spot261 Vice Admiral Admiral

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    spot261
    Seems the crew would suffer a lot of muscle wastage through not using their bowels.....
     
  4. 2takesfrakes

    2takesfrakes Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    The STAR TREK authors visiting this site will start getting worried ...
     
  5. Jayson1

    Jayson1 Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Why do you say that?

    Jason
     
  6. 2takesfrakes

    2takesfrakes Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Because you're giving it away for free, that which they cannot deliver, at a fee, sir!
     
  7. Jayson1

    Jayson1 Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Thank you for the nice words. I want to do some more. Next time I write something I might even plan it out before I write something. The whole idea basically came to me 5 minutes before I wrote it.

    Jason
     
  8. 2takesfrakes

    2takesfrakes Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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