How do you feel about Valentines Day?

[Gotham Central]

So honestly, how do you feel about Valentines Day?

Do you like the day? Are you virulently opposed to it? Are you indifferent?

why do you feel the way you do? Has it changed over time?

As someone who was never able to date (and certainly no relationships), I've never been a big fan of the day. Traditionally, when possible, I tried to sleep through the day and let my bitterness fly.

Now I'm just trying to be supportive of my other friends who enjoy the day. I'm working toward indifference

As long as I don't have to spend time around the couples, I'm all good. Watching war and horror movies tends to help

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

I think working towards indifference is great for any of these emotional kicks in the gut that you know, rationally, you don't really need to be reacting to. Somedays though I wonder if I have worked myself into a little too much indifference but that's another topic

When ever I've been in a relationship I've been the one that tries to make the day special and the other person has either been against it or is resolutely digging their heels in because they resent being prodded to produce romance. Which of course shits me especially as I am a very easy person to please, you can please me for 10 bucks and a romantic hug but whatever.. it's something I've wondered about because I've been hearing these stories for years from other women as well, the bf or husband who just will not acknowledge the day. Though quite happy to embrace commercialism in every other aspect of life suddenly they have some high horse they must ride off into the sunset on (alone) over this day. Something weird is at work there, and it is not principles.

So I think it is a fun day. I like the idea of making it about lots of people you love, not just romance. It's very low key in Australia compared to the US (actually you could say that about everything..) so that idea has never come up, we don't give out cards in school for instance.

One year in my high school they did flowers, you could send a white, pink or red carnation to someone anonymously or signed. I sent a white one to some boy that I thought was a very nice person anonymously and that kid was SO pleased.. he was walking around with that flower talking about who could it be, how great was this.. it was nice to make someone's day like that.

 

[Davros]

I only see it as the day before half priced chocolate day.

 

[thestrangequark]

I'm generally indifferent, though I like the chocolates. I honestly cannot grasp the level of bitterness with which some view the holiday.

 

[Locutus of Bored]

I think it's whatever you make of it.

I've never understood why some people get so angry and upset about it. It seems like that's just giving in to the very pressures you claim to reject about the holiday in the first place. If it truly is something you loathe or don't care about, then don't care about it. Making a big show out of how much you hate it and ruining the mood for the people who do enjoy it is the opposite of not caring. Treat it like any other day. While the romantic overtones and consumerism get pushed harder than normal, it's not as if there aren't diamond, flower, candy, restaurant, and dating commercials on every day of the year, or romantic movies and TV shows on all the time.

If you don't have a significant other or a date that day, make it about being with friends or family. There's more to love than just romantic relationships, even though that's the focus of the day. But it doesn't have to be about that for you. Do what you want. Hell, make it a day to watch action flicks and eat steak if you want. Go for a nice drive in the country. Visit a museum. Do what makes you happy.

If you don't have a date and are regretful of that, then get yourself out there. I know it's not as easy as that for some people because they have social awkwardness, but you'll never find a time with more people seeking to start a relationship then around Valentine's Day, because they're feeling the same pressures and have the same desire for companionship you do. Seize the day, and all that.

Anyway, I wish everyone the best, regardless of how they plan to celebrate the holiday or not. I just hope they try and do something positive and fun --romance related or not-- instead of wallowing and letting the day get you down.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

I'm generally indifferent, though I like the chocolates. I honestly cannot grasp the level of bitterness with which some view the holiday.

Me neither. And I agree with Locutus.

I've never had strong feelings about the day one way or the other. I usually do something nice for my partner(s) on that day but it's rarely a big production. I get the impression that those who hate it feel far more intensely about it than the couples who actually like to celebrate it.

 

[Mary Ann]

One year in my high school they did flowers, you could send a white, pink or red carnation to someone anonymously or signed. I sent a white one to some boy that I thought was a very nice person anonymously and that kid was SO pleased.. he was walking around with that flower talking about who could it be, how great was this.. it was nice to make someone's day like that.

[thread hijack and shameless plug]

And that's exactly what everyone on TBBS can do during our Valentine's Day Extravaganza. Head over to our thread in Misc and make someone's day with a virtual flower and note!

[/thread hijack and shameless plug, with apologies to Gotham Central]

The Valentine's Day hype is much lower in the UK than it was in Canada, and I like that it's more low key here. It's understandable that some people who are currently not in a romantic relationship dislike it, as it can be seen to rub their singleness in their faces. But it's not just about romantic relationships. It can be used as an excuse to buy some flowers for a friend or relative who means a lot to you, and that can really make their day.

I've been married for 18 years, and my husband and I stopped doing Valentine's Day a few years ago. The main reasons are (a) his birthday was yesterday, and as it's so close to the 14th we'll have had a meal out anyway and (b) the kids always consumed all the chocolates within 90 seconds while our backs were turned. We don't need a particular day to proclaim love and treat each other. In fact, as Husband works at a grocery store he always comes home from work on the 15th with half-priced flowers and chocolates just because they were cheap. Score!

 

[Gotham Central]

I'm generally indifferent, though I like the chocolates. I honestly cannot grasp the level of bitterness with which some view the holiday.

Me neither. And I agree with Locutus.

I've never had strong feelings about the day one way or the other. I usually do something nice for my partner(s) on that day but it's rarely a big production. I get the impression that those who hate it feel far more intensely about it than the couples who actually like to celebrate it.

To be fair, isn't that the point? I mean it's one thing to be invited to the party and have the option of not going. It's another to be left out and not have a choice at all. One is more likely to induce stronger emotions than the other.

 

[Pondwater]

Indifferent. It was fun back in Elementray and Middle school and I have an entertaining story on what happend senior year. As an adult, I've never celebrated it with someone, even when I had boyfriends. 14 February has a different meaning to me anyway. :-)

 

[thestrangequark]

I'm generally indifferent, though I like the chocolates. I honestly cannot grasp the level of bitterness with which some view the holiday.

Me neither. And I agree with Locutus.

I've never had strong feelings about the day one way or the other. I usually do something nice for my partner(s) on that day but it's rarely a big production. I get the impression that those who hate it feel far more intensely about it than the couples who actually like to celebrate it.

To be fair, isn't that the point? I mean it's one thing to be invited to the party and have the option of not going. It's another to be left out and not have a choice at all. One is more likely to induce stronger emotions than the other.

Of course you have a choice: throw your own fucking party.

If Valentine's day fills someone with so much bitterness that they are genuinely upset by it, then I'm not surprised they're single.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

For people who are single and not happy with being so, I would think Valentine's Day is the perfect day to throw some kind of singles party!

 

[Davros]

I honestly cannot grasp the level of bitterness with which some view the holiday.

Maybe they never got any valentines? All this attention on love isn't much fun for those who don't get any.

 

[Finn]

Indifferent here, as the missus' birthday is just a few days before

 

[MacLeod]

On one level I think why do you need a speical day to show someone how much you care about, but if it makes them happy good for them. That being a single person, I can sometimes find valentines day, one of the hardest on a emotional level. Don't get me wrong except for a few days of the year I usually don't mind that I'm single, however that doesn't mean I wouldn't like someone to share my life with.

 

[Gotham Central]

Me neither. And I agree with Locutus.

I've never had strong feelings about the day one way or the other. I usually do something nice for my partner(s) on that day but it's rarely a big production. I get the impression that those who hate it feel far more intensely about it than the couples who actually like to celebrate it.

To be fair, isn't that the point? I mean it's one thing to be invited to the party and have the option of not going. It's another to be left out and not have a choice at all. One is more likely to induce stronger emotions than the other.

Of course you have a choice: throw your own fucking party.

If Valentine's day fills someone with so much bitterness that they are genuinely upset by it, then I'm not surprised they're single.

WOW that seems…harsh

But whatever…

That said, it to me it seems obvious that it would induce stronger emotions for those feeling excluded.

Its like seeing a clubhouse that says "No Girls Allowed!" The boys inside, might not even feel that strongly about it, but you can bet that the girls kept out will have stronger feelings.

I suppose, some folks have no idea what its like to feel excluded.

 

[Gotham Central]

I honestly cannot grasp the level of bitterness with which some view the holiday.

Maybe they never got any valentines? All this attention on love isn't much fun for those who don't get any.

Yeah, I'm not seeing why some folks have a hard time grasping that

 

[thestrangequark]

I honestly cannot grasp the level of bitterness with which some view the holiday.

Maybe they never got any valentines? All this attention on love isn't much fun for those who don't get any.

I feel I am generally an empathetic person, but seriously, people complaining about Valentine's Day were the First World Problems meme before it became a meme.

 

[Kirby]

I generally hate it; of course, I never really had very many good Valentine's memories, and for a while there I would dedicate the day to doing my taxes. Fortunately my first date with my wife was on February 21st, so we always celebrate that instead.

 

[Gotham Central]

Indifferent. It was fun back in Elementray and Middle school and I have an entertaining story on what happend senior year. As an adult, I've never celebrated it with someone, even when I had boyfriends. 14 February has a different meaning to me anyway. :-)

Now I'm curious…what happened senior year?

 

[Gotham Central]

I generally hate it; of course, I never really had very many good Valentine's memories, and for a while there I would dedicate the day to doing my taxes. Fortunately my first date with my wife was on February 21st, so we always celebrate that instead.

Doing taxes that day would actually be a good idea. Sounds like a plan