TOS Caption Contest #253 I got 'em.

[MANT!]

Mitchell: "Hey, Smith! In the mood for a little prick?"
Smith: "No thanks, little prick!"
Mitchell: "Ouch!!"

McCoy: "Don't worry, Jim, it's just adenoids."

Kirk: "Who mourns for adenoids?"

Chekov: "End dey tink my English is bed!"

Spock: Logic would suggest that you try a task more fit for your abilities Ms Uhura...
Uhura: I'm trying to date the captain.
Spock: Fascinating... The lengths you humans go to impress the opposite sex is remarkable.

Kirk: "I brought the lubricant, now what are these "hentai" videos you wanted to show me?"

Kirk: "How many times do I have to tell you....these big crayons are washable, but I have a hell of a time getting your squid ink off the walls!"

Thanks again for all the entries..

Now for the next..

Keep it up folks!

 

[Nerys Myk]

"Beam me up" proved to be a bad choice as a safe word.

 

[Finn]

Kirk: Spock, you are blushing

 

[CorporalCaptain]

Eve: What do Vulcanian men say in a situation like this?

Spock: "Fascinating."

Marta: What do Vulcanian men say in a situation like this?

Kirk: Ahem, "Fascinating."

Spock: Yes, that is indeed the word.

 

[Gov Kodos]

Spock: "Maybe, I can get rid of T'Pring after all? She'd never expect Kirk to be that horny for alien girls."

 

[CorporalCaptain]

Marta: I taught Deela, Queen of the Scalosians, everything she knows -

Garth: Queen to queen's level three, Captain.

Marta: - but not everything I know.

Kirk: Queen to king's level one.

Spock: Fascinating.

 

[Vassa]

I'm sorry Miss, but you must have me confused with a different Captain James T. Kirk.

 

[Captain April]

Spock (thinking): Good thing Pon Farr is not far off.

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Thanks for the win, MANT!

Nimoy (thinking): "Thank you, William Ware Theiss!"

Mudd: "Just make sure you have her home by eleven, young man!"
Kirk: "Would that be AM or PM?"

Kirk: "Scotty! Stop playing with your balls and give me a hand here!"

 

[boco]

Spock: I've seen better
Marta(looking at Spock's woody): Me too

 

[Captain April]

Spock (thinking): Come on Pon Farr!

 

[Disruptor]

At that moment, Spock realized it had been a long time since he'd practiced the Vulcan nipple pinch.

Kirk: "You've done we'll for yourself, Harry. You've got everything a man could want."
Mudd: "Almost everything. Now tell, me, Captain, where do you get your hair pieces?"

Marta: "It's not easy being green, Captain."
Kirk: "In your case, it's sleezy being green."

Kirk: "You'll get your testicles back when you behave yourself, mister!"

 

[TrickyDickie]

Thanks for the wins! My wife thought of the squid ink and I thought of the graffiti.

 

[TrickyDickie]

Kirk: "Garth, aren't you hotter than hell in that outfit?"

Marta: "You're supposed to say, 'Marta, aren't you hotter than hell in that outfit'!"

Spock: "The captain is a man who means what he says."

Garth: "The little narcissist is just trying to get me to morph back into his own image."

Kirk: "Yes, the smell is definitely coming from him."

Scotty: "I told ye, I caught 'im red-handed!"

It was finally established, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that the episode was actually called 'The Pirates of Onion'.

 

[Nerys Myk]

SPOCK: I'm quite aware where your eyes are, Miss. It's just that I'm not drawn to them at this moment.

 

[TrickyDickie]

Spock: "Would you like to try one of these? It's definitely more fun than tri-d chest....er, chess."

 

[TrickyDickie]

Kirk: "More contraband, Harry? Haven't you learned your lesson yet?!?"

Harry: "You can have them for a very special price, bucko."

Alice: "I am touched that you will remember my name twenty years from now, but who is 'Gillian' and what is this place called 'Wonderland'?"

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Spock: Fascinating. They are real AND they are logical.

Garth of Izar: Chief boot knocka.

 

[bobarino]

Spock thinking: I do believe my human half is manifesting itself at this time

 

[boco]

Kirk: I suddenly want salad