Cap Con 74: State of Shock II: The Quickening

[Nerys Myk]

But First the WINNERS


Snookie Award

Archer: "Where are we?"
Daniels: "New Jersey."
Archer: "Looks the same as always. What's the big deal?"

He Should Know Award

Future Guy: So they're just dropping our storyline and moving on to something else?

Silik: Yeah, it looks that way.

Future Guy: Damn. The saddest part is even I think that's best for the series.

Airhead Award

Your mind to my mind....

Enterprise is filmed before a live studio audience Award

Voice-over announcer: "Tune in same time next week for another exciting installment of Enterprise."

The full-on 3 and a half minute album version of "Faith of the Heart" begins playing.

Coffee begins overflowing from the sugar bowl.

Jolene remains perfectly frozen, in spite of it all. Even Connor manages it.

Scott soons begins to warm up however.

A wince at first. Scolding hot liquid having now found the edge of the table, and the top of his leg.

Your Prize

 

[Nerys Myk]

And now this contest's pics

 

[creek_chub]

Archer: Look, I'm sorry, I didn't realize we weren't supposed to reshelve the books ourselves.

T'Pol: Truth or dare?
Archer: Truth. No, dare! I choose dare.
T'Pol: Too late, you already chose truth.

 

[Finn]

Archer: The Pegasus Incident of 2370, complete with the testimony of the legendary Captain Riker. Sounds interesting.

Daniels: Oh! You better not read that!

*swipes book*

 

[Smellincoffee]

T'Pol: You are leaving? So soon?
Archer: I have an early morning....thing.
T'Pol: When will I see you again?
Archer: I'll call you. Don't worry, I had a great time.

Suliban: Where are the nuclear wessels?!

 

[boco]

Xindi alien: Stop talking with that weird accent, human,and tell us where Wilson is!
Malcolm: Wilson??
Alien: THE ball !!

 

[ChristopherPike]

Well, stone me. Thanks for the win. He comes in handy, unblocking the sink.

T'Pol: "I fail to comprehend. What gives you the impression I am a lipstick lesbian?"

Silik: "Here look."

T'Pol: "I was informed by Lieutenant Reed, that this colour had worked for him in the past."

Silik: (eyes Malcolm with suspicion)

Reed: "Er, yes. Ah. Well... Now, this is awkward."

 

[ChristopherPike]

Daniels: "Do you have any idea what the fine is returning a book, TEN THOUSAND YEARS LATE?!?!"

Archer: "Well, it's a good job nobody's around to notice the dog-ears and that message Porthos left near the back."

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Silik: "It is a hand mirror."
T'Pol: "That much is obvious."
Silik: "What isn't obvious to you is the plomeek stuck in your teeth after every meal. Consider this an intervention."

Archer: "I've been meaning to ask... Why do you wear a stillsuit?"
Daniels: "You had to go into the sci-fi aisle!"

Silik: "Is it safe?... Is it safe?"
Reed: "You're talking to me?"
Silik: "Is it safe?"
Reed: "Is what safe?"
Silik: "Is it safe?"
Reed: "I don't know what you mean. I can't tell you something's safe or not, unless I know specifically what you're talking about."
Silik: "Is it safe?"
Reed: "Tell me what the "it" refers to."
Silik: "Is it safe?"
Reed: "Yes, it's safe, it's very safe, it's so safe you wouldn't believe it."
Silik: "Is it safe?"
Reed: "No. It's not safe, it's... very dangerous, be careful."

Archer: "I hate to be indelicate... Well you see it's like this... It's just that... Well, you see people on this deck are complaining. It's the noise. I mean it's nice that you and Trip... The moaning and the grunting and... I'm not saying don't enjoy yourselves, just restrain your enthusiasm."

T'Pol: "But watching the women's tennis with the sound on mute means you lose half the effect."

Archer: "Oh... oh... Oh thank God... Hey. That explains the commentary."

 

[ChristopherPike]

Silik: "Last chance, Mr. Reed. My associate here, is simply itching to break that stiff upper lip of yours."

Reed: "Wait. Just a minute. (spits blood)

I've lost track of your interrogation technique...

Are you playing the nice guy this time?

I mean, that Glaswegian kiss you gave me earlier indicated otherwise.

(glances down)

Look, all I ask is that you kindly take that hand off my knee..."

 

[Jonas Grumby]

T'Pol: "Fascinating. Your appearance is almost that of a living statue. A being made of granite. A man who is...rock hard."
Reed: "Down, girl!"

 

[grabthars hammer]

T'Pol: You will find that it doesn't DO anything; that's the beauty of it!

Daniels: This library features 21st century books... it will take us some time to find anything not vampire-related.

Silik: I'm not a sadist, Mister Reed, but you have left me no choice. Bring me the Seagal films!!!

Archer: I just wanted to check if you're okay... we've all been through a lot with these Suliboob... er.... Suliban.

 

[Jonas Grumby]

T'Pol: "Am I to understand that you are here in the hope of convincing me to allow you to engage in bodily contact of a sexual nature with me?"
Archer: "God, I love it when you talk dirty!"

 

[ChristopherPike]

Daniels: "The damage to the timeline is apparently much worse than I originally thought!

In this reality, you never even became a starship Captain. You seem to have been a prolific writer instead."

Archer: "Really?"

Daniels: "I flicked through some of work for inspiration."

Archer: "Oh wow. Was I... will I be any help?"

Daniels: "Yes. 57 different books in this aisle alone!

Very impressive."

(pats him on the back)

Archer: (looking around)

"Somebody really made a mess of this place didn't they?

I mean look at that over there! Complete and utter disregard for some of mankind's greatest ever achievements."

Daniels: "Actually that was me. Sorry. I couldn't find a step ladder.

I had to stack your books on the ground, in order to reach A Brief History of Time by Dr. Stephen Hawking."


-

 

[ChristopherPike]

Archer: "It's no use Subcommander. Trip hasn't been seen for days now. We KNOW he's in here."


[muffled noise]


"Tell you what. Why not allow him out of your quarters for a few hours, to go check on Engineering?


He can... you know... save us all from that dangerous warp reactor imbalance threatening the ship.


(nervous, perspiring)


I promise you'll love it. That's big too, throbbing uncontrollably and could explode in your face."

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Silik: "Oh, you are going to give us the codes! The only question is whether you'll do it in your normal voice or in a high soprano!"

 

[ChristopherPike]

Silik: "What do you mean? Nobody enjoys waterboarding!"

Reed: "Actually... it's true. I DO! What's more, I can prove it. I got a T-shirt at Risa and everything."

 

[boco]

Xindi: Where is the captain's woman? And don't tell me again that your captain doen't have one, bec I KNOW that ALL captains have one!

 

[boco]

Xindi: My pet needs a new toy, I heard your crew saying that you're the one that has the balls,so where are they???!!

 

[boco]

T'Pol: I thought dr. Phlox was going to check my "special area"..
Archer: Well, he's got the flu, can't go out of sickbay, so you've got me..