Cap Con 71: A Horse With No Name

[Nerys Myk]

But first the WINNERS!

COURT JESTER AWARD

T'Pol: No, the pellet with the poison's in the vessel with the pestle. The chalice from the palace holds the brew that is true.

BE HERE, ALOHA AWARD

Trip: "'Book 'em, Danno'? The hell is that supposed to mean?"

MY EYES! THEY BURN!! AWARD

T'pol: "Captain, we have an emergency."

Archer: "My water polo game's on. Come back when it's a catastrophe."

T'pol: "Doctor Phlox is wearing my spare catsuit."

AWARD

ARCHER: "Neat. A race of white Samurai with smiley faces on their cheeks!

Will this galaxy EVER stop amazing me?"

Your prize:

 

[Nerys Myk]

And now, this contest's pics:

 

[TiberiusMaximus]

Trip: Cap'n, are you sure taking off our shirts will make us invulnerable?
Archer: It's worked on every action movie I've ever seen.

Trip: We lost!
Archer: Shouldn't have put our shirts back on.

BTW Thanks for the win! I hoped somebody would appreciate the quote!

 

[Finn]

T'Pol: (OS) What's a Devil Threeway?

Trip: Did I ever tell you that you look like one of Murphy Brown's receptionists?

Archer: Yes... Many times.

*thinks* Why doesn't anyone mention that football movie?

 

[Smellincoffee]

Archer, panting: I'm done for, Trip! Go on without me!
Trip: ...cap'n, you're the one carryin' me.

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Trinneer: "If we were on cable, you think they'd have Jolene and Linda doing this scene instead of us?"

Archer: "Oh, gross! Apparently, there are cats on this planet!"

 

[cooleddie74]

TRIP: Fine. I'll take off the shirt.

But if the pants come off? You owe me one of Chef's catfish and steak platters.

TRIP: Damn, dude.

Even in a damn DESERT I can tell you didn't put on any deodorant this morning.

 

[cooleddie74]

ARCHER: What can I say?

Space cocaine is a HELLUVA drug.

ARCHER: Quick...hide!!!

The shuttlecraft from STAR TREK V found us!!!

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Archer: "It's not what it looks like! We were just wrasslin!"

 

[Captain Zog]

Trip: "Gaa...Cap'n..help...cough!..cough!

Archer: "Archer to Enterprise. We're gonna have to risk an emergency beam-up. Trip's got his head stuck in his T-shirt again. Have Phlox ready with some painkillers and a chainsaw."

RIIIIIPPPP!!!

Trip: "What was that?"

Archer: "Let's just say the bare-bottom look doesn't exactly do much for you."

Archer: "I really shoulda brought someone - ANYONE - else down here with me!"

 

[LeadHead]

Archer: You brought the sunscreen, right?

Archer: No, Trip. That was another mirage. T'Pol is on Enterprise.

Connor: She broke up with you in Men of a Certain Age?!

Reed: (over comm) Really, Captain? A Phase Pistol against a shuttlepod? There are two settings, useless and idiotic.

 

[cooleddie74]

Even in the 22nd century, Party Boy loved to party.

ARCHER: Stay hidden, dammit!

The helicopter is still looking for us...and I don't think O.J. is going to last much longer than us, either!

TRIP: Would this be a bad time to tell you I've got the runs?

 

[T'Girl]

Trip: "I hope all three of us get out of this."

Archer: "Three?"

Travis: "Yes Captain, Tucker, you and myself."

Archer: "Who said that?"

 

[BlobVanDam]

Tucker: Cap'n, I've forgotten again. Does the rabbit go twice around the tree, or is it into the rabbit hole first?
Archer: You're putting on a shirt Trip, not tying your shoelaces.
Tucker: Well that would explain why my right shoulder just dislocated.

Archer: No, I think it's just a rash from the sand storm. I don't think Vulcans can even catch that disease, so I think you're in the clear.

Tucker: So he actually called you "pink skin?"
Archer: Yep
Tucker: And right in front of Travis?
Archer: Yep
Tucker: Oh man. What did Travis say?
Archer: Nuthin'! So I think we're in the clear.

 

[cooleddie74]

STAR TREK:ENTERPRISE

Coming to the LOGO Network this fall

 

[cooleddie74]

TRIP: Brown sugar...h-h-how come it tastes so good?

 

[JarodRussell]

Police Helicopter: RELEASE THE DOGS!

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Patrolman in hovercar (OS): "Attention, you on the ground! This is a private beach!"
Archer: "And this is a private act! Now piss off!"

 

[cooleddie74]

ARCHER: Quick, RUN!!!

Professor Falken called the cops!!!

 

[cooleddie74]

BAYWATCH

The Next Generation