Kirk: Where the hell is Sulu?
McCoy: He is busy massaging Chekov's feet.
TOS Caption Contest #143: Mostly Muddy, Chance of Prostitutes
- Thread starter Shatmandu
- Start date
McCoy: He is busy massaging Chekov's feet.
Kirk: Where's Sulu?
McCoy: Inside that box Chekov's lying on. They've found out what the hole on the top's for.
Spock: Because of my half-human ancestry, the flactulence is only 50% hydrogen sulfide based compounds. I assure you that a limited exposure in a turbolift will not be fatal.
Spock: Because of my half-human ancest...
McCoy: Damnit, Spock! It still smells like rotten eggs and spoiled plomeek! Jim, if we're not out of this cell in 24 hours, we'll die!
Checkov: You see? Wulcan porn, every file! All of them!
HARCORT! You left dressed like a pirate, and come back dressed like Captain Crunch! You've been with that bastard Jackson AGAIN!! When I'm through with you, all you'll be able to do is moonwalk!
Could Stella be any MORE annoying? Oh, you bet yer ass...
"Harcourt! Harcourt Fenton Mudd, what yousa been up to? Nothing mooey good, mesa be sure! Well, let mesa tell yousa, yousa lazy, good-for-nothing..."
Spock: "Mr Mudd. Kindly ask your associate to remove her thumb from my ass. I am not into that."
Kirk: "Can's free."
All: "We'll wait."
Checkov: "Deed you see vot Spock put on you're Feecebook vall?"
Stella: "STOP!.........In the naaaaame of love, before you break my heart."
McCoy: "Good lord, does this thing have an 'off' button?"
"I don't make the rules, you can't enter corduroy city wearing velour or epaulettes!"
"So you found the secret of the studio set, behind the polystyrene... cardboard!"
"You have meddled with the primal forces of nature, Mr. Mudd, and you...will...ATONE!!"
Stella: "Errrrmmmm, Harcourt Fenton Mudd.... Have you left the toilet seat up again?"
Mudd: "Yes, dear. We've had this conversation before, my sweet. Don't you remember the last time I didn't?
As I recall, we had to send in Norman... wearing a water-proof rubber suit, so he didn't short circuit."
Kirk: "Watcha all listenin' to?"
Spock: "I believe it's what Earth musicians call a cover version. A different interpretation of a popular song known as 'Rocket Man'."
McCoy: "It's certainly different alright..."
Chekov: "This is widiculous! Everytime she gets down to her bra and panties, the screen goes blank.
Wot a swizz! It's cut out again! Now it's asking me to insert another five credits!
I don't agree with you at all, sir. She doesn't even wemotely look like...
...oh, hello Uhura! Must you sneak up on us like that when we're..."
Uhura: "Working? Yeah right..."
Stella: "Harcourt Fenton Mudd! You've been out all night at that Gay Roller Disco again haven't you?!?"
Mudd: remains perfectly still, betrayed by his feet which are slowly drifting to the left
(clearing his throat)
"Perhaps..."
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Spock: "Sorry Ladies but I had broccoli & cheese for lunch"
Chekov: "So this is what celing cat is Spying on the Keptin and the yomen?"
Uhura: "Oh, he stuck it in the wrong hole ,,lol
Stella: "His dick is the size of an AAA battery, Erect!!"
McCoy: "Man, I fucked like ten Maisey's today."
Chekov: "Yes but four of them had Adams Apples"
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Kirk: "Well, what a happy looking bunch! C'mon, admit it, was I right or was I right! I told you, once you go Orion ladyboy, you'll never go back!"
<muzak plays>
Mudd: Girl from Ipanema?
Spock: Correct.
Chekov: Mr. Spock just updated his Facebook: "Mr. Spock is in a relationship vith Lieutenant Uhura."
Uhura: Really?! He does care.
DeSalle: I'm in a relationship too.
Chekov: Vith your right or left hand?