Totally foolish alternate energy idea thread!

[Plecostomus]

We could build a GIANT WINDMILL out in the desert and power it by blowing up atomic bombs near it. The rush of "wind" caused by the blast will spin the windmill very fast and produce shitloads of electrical power.

We'll store the power in a giant battery and run nearby towns and cities off of it. If my numbers are correct... we should only need 2-3 detonations per day.

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My other idea involves using a flow of lava to spin a ceramic wheel with a generator attached. Eventually the lava will touch water and we'll collect the steam and use that to run a turbine generator.

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Post 'em if you got 'em. Lets keep the ideas flowing.

 

[Ward Fowler]

^ With ideas like that, you may be eligible for a grant from the DOE.

Personally I think we should genetically engineer a giant mutant gerbil that could run a turbine the size of Texas. If we need him to get bigger we can feed him nuclear waste.

 

[Lindley]

A magneto generates current by having wire near a rotating magnet, right? And the Earth is a giant permanent magnet, right?

So we just need to run a loop of wire all the way around the planet up in orbit, and we're golden.

 

[Brent]

We could always just build a Dyson sphere

 

[Trekker4747]

World-wide coverage of impact-induction magnets!

I've heard of some places -like a hotel's drive-up balcony- installing these things -like minor speed bumps- and everytime a car drives over them they stimulate the magnet that generates electricty.

We simply need to build these into every square foot of sidewalks (so the shock of each foot-fall stimulates the magnet) and put these minor speed bumps on city-streets -say at every intersection.

Think of all the energy we'd generate!

 

[Gepard]

A magneto generates current by having wire near a rotating magnet, right? And the Earth is a giant permanent magnet, right?

So we just need to run a loop of wire all the way around the planet up in orbit, and we're golden.

I believe that a space tether, if made of electrically conductive materiel, would do just that.

 

[Ward Fowler]

^Yep. It would probably be made of nanotubes which are certainly conductors.

 

[Plecostomus]

What about people with restless leg syndrome or other muscle spasms? We could hook them to generators!

 

[Myasishchev]

What about people with restless leg syndrome or other muscle spasms? We could hook them to generators!

Worked for the machines in the Matrix, a movie totally without scientific flaw.

We could save all of the antimatter that particle accelerators produce. Think of it--whole light bulbs lit for seconds at a time...

 

[tharpdevenport]

How about kenetic energy gatherers in the bar holding toilet paper, that way each tiem you pull some off, it gathers the energy, and it's stored in a device that channels it into the house? Foolish? yes. Crazy? More so.


Or to get our fat generation of iPod bastards walking ... shoes that do the same thing, with a wire leading to the iPod. NO batteries in it. If they want power, they have to walk. The pudgy bastards.


Cats LOVE lying in the sun and crazy women love dressing them in shit, so why not dress them in solar panels?

 

[Unicron]

^ Actually, that sounds like a good idea (about solar cats). We can make easy energy by finding a way to convert all the hot air in TNZ.

 

[Doran]

We need vehicles that run on sulpher dioxide (human farts), that way we can gas up at Taco Bell. Just insert tube and go!

If all else fails, go buy batteries.

 

[Alpha_Geek]

You fools! Bow to my superior intellect! The answer to the energy crisis is OBVIOUS!!!

We simply build an enormous gear around the equator, then place an electrical generator of sufficient size to power each continent in orbit above each continent.

All we have to do then is build a drive train from the Great Equitorial Gear to each generator, and run some cable.

The generators are then powered by the earths rotation!!

Phear the superior mind!

 

[Alpha_Geek]

What about people with restless leg syndrome or other muscle spasms? We could hook them to generators!

This theory does show promise. You could yield more power though if your kinetic energy sources were in a state of Gran Mal, either induced or natural.

 

[Haggis and tatties]

How about a tether that's goes to the moon, and is hooked up to a big generator on earth which is on rails which runs right round the world, and the moon drags its rounds the earth producing power.

You could also even use the tether while its dragging the big generator as a free transport of goods and people around the world or cheap round the world holidays.

 

[Gepard]

We simply build an enormous gear around the equator, then place an electrical generator of sufficient size to power each continent in orbit above each continent.

All we have to do then is build a drive train from the Great Equitorial Gear to each generator, and run some cable.

Have you been reading Jay Lake's "Mainspring" novels, by any chance? (Serious question.)

 

[Alpha_Geek]

Actually I'm not familiar with them. Did the author usurp my idea in advance?

 

[Alpha_Geek]

How about a tether that's goes to the moon, and is hooked up to a big generator on earth which is on rails which runs right round the world, and the moon drags its rounds the earth producing power.

Again, an idea with merit, but I say put the generator on the moon. The Earth is bigger so it can push harder.

 

[JustAFriend]

Mandate 2 hours a day of treadmill or stationary bike time for ever person under the guise of "public health" and "obesity reduction".

The person in charge of the program could be given the title of Pharaoh....

 

[Plecostomus]

This thread makes me smile. Mission accomplished.