The pics for this round
DS9 Caption That # "My Cell's Ennui"
- Thread starter Judas Ascendant
- Start date
"I hear them. I hear them. That's Damar's voice, all right. He and Rusot are in the kanar cellar. I thought we boarded that up?"
"They must have found another way in".
"By my guess, they're on the 12th bottle. Calculate probable levels of Cardassian smugness and leering drunken Vorta-slurring, First"
"Off the scale, sir"
"Damn".
"And I was just standing there, Doctor, standing in Central Command HQ, and I suddenly realized I was stark naked. Damar was laughing at me."
And just after pressing "send", Sisko realized: The Hot and Shirtless Bajoran Dabo Catalogue was the first comm link, the Admiralty was on the second.
Woman behind Nog: "I hope you boys realize that outbidding me WILL result in a personal visit from my boyfriend. Bruiser, honey, put that man down. I'm sure he didn't mean to "look at you funny"".
Quark: "Sold! The lot goes to the six-armed, eighteen-foot tall cybernetic fire-breathing zombie of Willie Mays!"
The idea of inscribing the Dominion's secret invasion plans on an ordinary strand of hair was starting to seem a tad less genius than it had the day before.
Sisko: "A Billy Mays rookie card? What the hell?
"
The Dominion was determined to find out just where the inspiration for the baffling 'five words thingy' had came from but as yet the search had proven to be fruitless.
Nog: Hey, Isn't that Gul Dukat?
Jake: Yeah and he's wearing a hat.
Nog: A purple hat?!
Dukat (offscreen): A manly hat I'll have you know.
Doctor: I'm afraid to say Mr Weyoun, that you seem to be suffering from an advanced stage of paranoia
Weyoun: Of course I'm paranoid, everyone's trying to kill me,especially that damned Damar.
Sisko: (viewing the DS9 'five word thingy' thread): where in the hell are they getting this stuff....goddamn!
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Jake: Is that...a spider in her...bra...
Jem'Hadaar: My Vorta-controller is working! *Weyoun falls to knees* Oops...
Bald Man: My inflateable Weyoun looks so real. =D
Sisko: Oooo...pwetty...
In order to avoid detection, the founder was forced to assume the form of a carpet. This made communicating with her subordinates difficult...
And you don't even want to know where Weyoun had just placed his hands.
In order to avoid detection, the founder was forced to assume the form of a carpet. This made communicating with her subordinates difficult...
Auctioneer: "I didn't say, 'Simon says.'"
Weyoun: "Did we have to get quarters over Dax's, the noise is, distracting to say the least. What was that slap?"
First: "Scanners indicate that she is currently having sexual congress with a tag team."
"Total fallacy. Sunbeds in no way cause cancer."
Jake: "You don't know how hard it was, or what it cost me. But there you are... Dax, naked!"
Sisko: "I meant, Jadzia, not Curzon, but it's the thought that counts."
There I am... I'm bald?
Weyoun: strange, I think I can hear Sisko crying. Why is that I wonder?
Weyoun: This carpet is sooo soft on my face.
First: Maybe you'd better check it out on ultraviolet.
Nog: Jake, I think the auction is across the promenade.
Jake: Then what's this?
Nog: An Angry Alien Lesbians Anonymous meeting.
Jake: Let's get out of here.
Lady behind them: Sit your ass down.
Weyoun: I have some concerns about your bald-spot removal machine.
Doctor: It's perfectly safe and 100% effective.
Weyoun: But -
Doctor: I just happen to like my bald spot.
Hmm...Willie Hawkins, the first black baseball player for the New York Giants...yet his head looks like a fanny.
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"Better back up off me fool."
Weyoun : " .. And you promise to pay me in peanut butter and jelly sandwiches? "
Doctor : " Just lie back and you can have all the sandwiches you want."
Weyoun : "Fascinating."
Jem Hadar : "Can you hear me now? "
Weyoun : "I can hear ..... the great link."
Jake : "Dad, the guy in this ancient IBM advertisement looks just like you."
Sisko : "What the hell is a flying car?"
It all seemed so innocent at first. The Boslic captain simply got Jake and Nog's attention. Then she waved at them. Naturally, they waved back, and in the process inadvertently offered the winning bid for the Tellarite picture set of erotic nudes. When they saw her come in the bar later to collect her 5% cut, it all made sense: Quark had done it again.
WEYOUN: "Arrgh, this is no good! We're not getting anywhere! Call for reinforcements!"
JEM'HADAR: "This is First Ilat'Avok, I have a Code R-16 emergency and need assistance! That's correct, R-16, 'Vorta with lost contact lens'. Come to this location immediately."
WEYOUN: "Do you expect me to talk?"
GIGER: "No Mr. Weyoun, I expect you to die."
JAKE: "Dad, your date's in about three minutes, you should've left by now! Go on!"
SISKO: "Right, of course, of course... I'm just gonna check my hair one last time, okay?"
Auctioneer: "Sold to the Being of Inconceivable Horror."
Being of Inconceivable Horror: "Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!"
Weyoun: "La-dee-da..."
*trips, falls on floor, breaks neck*
First: "*sigh* And we just had this one broken in."
When Giger's cellular entertainment chamber didn't work as he had hoped, he found a new use for it: dead Vorta disposal.
Sisko: "Wait a minute; this is a Barry Bonds card! It's worthless now!"
Being of Inconceivable Horror: "Will a money order be okay?"
Auctioneer: "Yes."
Being of Inconceivable Horror: "Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!"
Weyoun #3: Now you're sure there won't be any negative consequences from using this shrink ray?
Giger: Positive
Later that day
Jem'Hadar: No luck in scanning for your predecessor, sir. Can you hear him?
Weyoun #4: Dammit, I can't. We forgot to implant the ability to shout loud at small sizes into that copy.
Doctor: Now hold still thie will hurt alot
Romulan: Well thanks the hell alot. ya Jerk!
Sisko: <Thinking> Ah man the sisters are HOT in this klingon porno with Worf!
"Goddamn it!" (inserting another twenty credits for 5 min)
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