That cake is so tempting

[Miss Chicken]

Last night, my middle son Adam phoned me and asked if I would be home today. He wanted to come and visit me, along with his housemate and her two children. I told them I would be home.

This morning I rushed around doing all the housework, I walked down to the local shopping centre and bought a delicious looking cake for afternoon tea and some cordial for the children. I also bought a couple of little toys for the children (as I don't see them all that often).

They were meant to arrive at 3pm and it is now 5pm and no sign of them.

The cake is sitting on the table calling out for me to eat it. I am on a diet. What should I do?

EDIT - My other son will be home from work in about an hour.

 

[ShamelessMcBundy]

The cake is a lie.

 

[Roshi]

^Damn!

 

[RoJoHen]

Have a small piece to determine if the cake is actually as delicious as it looks. If it is, continue to eat it. If not, give it to your kids. Pigging out one time won't hurt your diet that much. Just, I dunno, eat a lot of celery tomorrow or something to make up for it.

 

[Kestra]

Eat a small piece, or if you're just craving something sweet, have a piece of fruit or something.

 

[ShamelessMcBundy]

^Damn!

I'm surprised no one beat me to it.

 

[Hermiod]

^Curse you!!!

/waves fist at McBundy!

 

[RoJoHen]

I have learned from experience that cake is NEVER a lie.

 

[Hermiod]

I have learned from experience that cake is NEVER a lie.

You've never played Portal then.

 

[RoJoHen]

I have learned from experience that cake is NEVER a lie.

You've never played Portal then.

That would be an accurate statement.

 

[ShamelessMcBundy]

Dude neither have i, but even i know that the cake is a lie.

 

[Hermiod]

That would be an accurate statement.

There's no sense crying over every mistake. You just keep on trying till you run out of cake.

Long story short - you are continually promised cake by an artificial intelligence named GlaDOS as a reward for completing tests in Portal. The discovery of a hidden area where a previous test subject has scrawled "the cake is a lie" on the walls repeatedly is one of the first things to alert you to the fact that GlaDOS is lying to you.

 

[RoJoHen]

That would be an accurate statement.

There's no sense crying over every mistake. You just keep on trying till you run out of cake.

Long story short - you are continually promised cake by an artificial intelligence named GlaDOS as a reward for completing tests in Portal. The discovery of a hidden area where a previous test subject has scrawled "the cake is a lie" on the walls repeatedly is one of the first things to alert you to the fact that GlaDOS is lying to you.

Um, that's fucking hilarious.

 

[Hermiod]

Um, that's fucking hilarious.

The game is one of the funniest video games ever released.

 

[The Boy Who Cried Worf]

1. Dump the cake on your son's front doorstep and set it on fire.

2. Remove son from will.

 

[Starbreaker]

The cake is a lie.

 

[An Officer]

Did they ever turn up, Miss Chicken?

 

[Aurian]

Have yourself a little piece of the cake. Do things 80% right 80% of the time and 80% wrong 20% of the time. That will work wonders on a diet. If you never learn to deviate from the diet every once in a while without remorse, it is never going to be easy to keep the kilos off.

A bit rude of your son not to show up.

 

[Zulu Romeo]

[turns up, makes LazyTown "Cooking By The Book" reference, leaves]




But seriously, my advice is to follow what your heart desires. [ZOMG Sugar! - someone's heart]

 

[Roshi]

Ok, who played Portal here?

Seriously, Miss Chicken, a diet based on privation is not a good diet because you punish your body/brain. And that fucker entity is rancorous. Sooner or later, it will make you pay. Hence, I won't put too much faith that kind of diet. Eat just one slice. I promise you it won't show on your hip. As long as you don't take a second slice. Remember, privation is no good!