TOS Caption Contest #116 - Not Just the Packers Choke

[Shatmandu]

The Plomeek soup wasn't bad. The Plomeek farts, though ...

Spock occasionally slipped the word "fuck" into his lectures, just to see if anyone was listening.

Spock: "Since you don't like computers, here's an entire book listing the ways you suck ass, you old cracker-assed cracker."

 

[Rat Boy]

The cover to the latest childrens' book titled, Everybody Shats.

 

[E-Blonde]

Scotty (to self): Whoever smelt it dealt it.
McCoy (to self): Whoever denied it supplied it.
Kirk (offscreen): Who farted?

 

[E-Blonde]

Kirk never hid is feelings about the historical importance of Archer to Starfleet.

 

[E-Blonde]

To the crew, Kirk's impersonation of Sulu was his best gag.

 

[The Squire of Gothos]

Nimoy was relieved when Shatner started hiding someone else's bike for a change.

 

[Rat Boy]

I Want a Pony's not too amused when Naughty Boy and Clarence brag about the Niners beating the Bills.

 

[Alyssa]

Chekov and Uhura thought it was the funniest thing ever to slip tobasco in the captains chicken sandwich and coffee

The Miss Enterprise Pageant drew in a great crowd, unfortunatly no one mentioned that Spock was the host.

Kelley was a little less amused at his outfit in Star Trek TMP

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Shatner: "ACTING!"

ST: TMP drydock scene: Take One.

 

[cooleddie74]

ALTOIDS

The curiously lethal mint (TM)

SCOTTY:"At least the lad died the way he lived. In an EV suit...pawing himself for gasps of air."

Practical jokes on the old TOS soundstages were never more hilarious than when they involved Grace Lee Whitney's diary and blackmail plots.

 

[cooleddie74]

"Now THAT'S a-spicy meteing-out o'da torture!!"

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Kirk: " Just where is our future, the things we've done and said!
Let's just push the button, we'd be better off dead!
'Cause I hate you!
And I berate you!
And I can't wait to get to you!


The sins of all our fathers, being dumped on us — the sons.
The only choice we're given is how many megatons?
And I eschew you!
And I say, screw you!
And I hope you're blue, too.


We're all bloody worthless, just greedy human scum.
The numbers all add up to a negative sum.


And I hate you!
And I hate you!
And I hate you...too! "

Chekov mumbling: "I knew we should have gone with Daydream Believer."

 

[cooleddie74]

SHAHNA:"NO!!!

The Providers gave you the safety word...now SAY IT!!"

 

[cooleddie74]

McCOY:"Hey.

Scotty.

Check it out. Down by your right foot.


A Mercury head dime."

NIMOY:"I can't do this scene...Bill and De keep pawing each other's crotches and asking me if I want any of their Hot Fairy Action."

 

[M'Sharak]

There was only one thing worse than the (fortunately fictional) Dreaded Vulcan
Plomeek Soup Fart, and De Kelley knew it. For Bill Shatner, it was already too late.

 

[Nerys Myk]

McCoy was none to pleased to discover the whole "Vulcans lack emotions" thing was a gag thought up by Kirk and Spock.

 

[Outpost4]

McCoy (to himself): If Spock tells that old 'Klingons around Uranus' joke one more time...

 

[highlander]

This is the precise moment that Jim realized there was a control collar around his testicles as well.

 

[highlander]

Staying awake through the Sunday sermon was impossible after the long night of drinking and buggery that Bones and Scotty enjoyed Saturday night.

 

[Rat Boy]

After capturing the cast of the show again, Melllvar installed an invisible dog fence to keep them from escaping.