Movies Caption Contest #249: 20 years of Generations

[LeadHead]

Hello everyone! New contest!

First up to the plate, we have the "Medical Necessities" Award, going to:

Kirk: "My duodenum! I'm not supposed to get lightning shot through it!"

Next, we have "The Decider" Award, going to:

"Last time I checked, helmsman, I'M the commanding officer on this ship! I make the tough decisions! When you've put in the time, you can sit in the big chair! Now, contact Starfleet Command and ask them if we should begin scanning of the Genesis planet. J.T. Estaban commanding."

Next, we have the "Break's Over" Award, going to:

PICARD: "Alright Riker, break's over. Quit flirting with the guests and get your butt back to work. Table 8 has ordered another pitcher of Romulan Ale and a platter of Buffalo Gagh."

I was unable to "Properly Blend" the contestants for this award down to one, so there are 3 Winners!

ESTABAN: Oh my God! Evasive!
HELMSMAN: What about the shields?
ESTABAN: Oops! How silly of me! Eva—
B O O M ! ! !

"Venkman, Stantz, Spengler, Zeddemore - report to the bridge ASAP!"

Esteban: "...seriously? We're getting robocalls still? The election was a week ago!"

Many thanks to our competitors and congratulations to our winners!

And now, in recognition of Star Trek: Generations' 20th (Belated) Birthday, lets spend some time with that film from 1994...

Enjoy!

 

[LeadHead]

Kirk: Sounds like a ship crashing.

Picard: RIKER!!!!!

Riker: We the officers and crew of the U.S.S. Enterprise, hereby make the following charges against Lieutenant Commander Worf. That he did knowingly, and willfully, join the cast of Deep Space Nine and effectively end all chances of any TNG character making a guest appearance. And, that he made the command structure of that show completely indecipherable.

Spiner: Boo-yah! I'm more important than all of you! They made me a new uniform and made Frakes borrow Avery Brooks'!

 

[Nerys Myk]

PICARD: Yours?

KIRK: I thought it might be yours.

PICARD: This Nexus is trickier than we thought.

 

[SicOne]

Spiner:"What the eff are you slapnuts looking at? Haven't you ever seen an android do the hand jive? Nothing to see here, move along. Jeezus."

 

[SicOne]

Riker: The menu on this ship sucks. I miss the replicator.

 

[Rat Boy]

Kirk: "Wouldn't have been easier to go further back in time? You know, to when you first met him?"

Picard: "This is the 24th Century. We've evolved to have a much more dramatic sensibility."

Picard: "Remove the Stone of Shame! Attach the Stone of Triumph!"

Riker: "...uh, sir, that's kind of a bad idea..."

Riker: "Dammit, Data, get off Snapchat!"

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

In the Navy, you can sail the seven seas...In the Navy, you can put your mind at ease...

 

[Rat Boy]

Data: "I got a new uniform!"

Riker: "I got a new-ish uniform."

Worf: "I got a chair."

 

[Hutchy01]

Data: I'm detecting a 95% increase in uniform continuity errors. (did no-one else notice this terror) (also it was 20 years of the last contest!)

 

[shivkala]

Picard: It's just, I well, I'm second guessing myself. I mean, if we could exit the Nexus at any point in time, why here? Why not when Soran was on the Enterprise and I had a full compliment of security officers to detain him?

Riker: I'll be damned, the Starfleet Officer's Code of Conduct does say that we must submit to the Captain's cosplay fantasies at any time.


[IMAGE REMOVED PER BOARD RULES. Thanks.]

 

[Nebusj]

Picard: ``They saw us spit over the edge! Cheese it!''

Picard: ``Look lively, men! This is the finest sailing brig in the Royal Navy!''
Riker: ``Sir, this is the Battle of the Atlantic program and that's a U-boat surfacing.''

Riker: ``Find out what maniac even wrote Data a knuckle-cracking algorithm and strangle him.''

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Picard: "Dear God! What in heaven's name is Worf doing!"
Riker: "Apparently, being historically accurate. According to these historical records, that's why we call lavatory facilities 'the head' today. You know, from the figurehead at the bow of the ship."
Picard: "I know, but...Jesus!!"

 

[inflatabledalek]

Picard: What is that?

Kirk: That's an even worse Next Generation film that will be released in 8 years and consign this to a forgotten footnote of cinema history. Which is a result compared to how we would otherwise have been remembered.

Picard: NOW HEAR THIS:

Riker: Starfleet command here decrees that any crewmember who has suffered a severe and traumatic family loss only needs to sit in their quarters with the lights off listening to Troi's stating of the obvious about their pain for three minutes.

After that said crewmember can work through any remaining grief by punching the nearest pensioner in the face.

Repeatedly.

Untill they feel better.

Data: Just like...

EVERYONE ELSE: yeah, yeah. Yar. We really need to get you laid again so you have other anecdotes.

 

[Mojochi]

Kirk: Are you really the captain of the Enterprise?

Picard: Of course I am. That's her right there....... Plummeting toward the planet

Riker: It's from Worf. He's taken the dingy. He mounted a cannon on it & named it Defiant

Riker: At least he's not doing the hand farting song this time

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Stewart: "We're supposed to be looking at the Nexus. They'll put it into the shot later."
Shatner: "Yeah, I read the script. Do they really have to put it in at all?"

Picard: "Run out the starboard battery! I'll show these pesky trekkies what a cannon violation really is!"

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Riker: Sir, I've been going over your grocery list...exactly why are we dressed like this again?

Picard: Because I want some REAL Earl Grey tea and by damn, we are going to get some, even if we have to travel back 600 years to do it.

 

[tharpdevenport]

Picard: "You know, Kirk, that sky is the lovliest shade of blue. What do you suppose they call that? Cerulean Blue. Cerulean Blue is like a summer breeze . A gentle summer breeze. A nice cerulean blue breeze down the mountain side..."

Riker: "Thee, ah, subject of the memo is: Dress Codes. In order to promote a more work-friendly environment, female employees will be required to raise the hem of theirs skirts to an attractive level. All portly and matronly women disregard this notice."

Picard: "And whomever that guy is wearing the women's uniform, cease and dissist immediately."

 

[SicOne]

Kirk: Well, at least I won't die alone.

Picard: ...Yeah, let's go with that.

 

[Rat Boy]

Riker: "...this is your Christmas list, sir?"

Picard: "No, Number One, that's just the table of contents."

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Picard: "Yes, this is good. Save these holodeck settings, Number One. Cape Horn is much more pleasant with clear skies, calm waters and warm temperatures."
Riker: "You've the heart of a true adventurer, sir."