Movies Caption Contest #247: Up and Running

[Triskelion]

Bones: Would you like to buy a can of Pringles so I can put myself through medical school?
Kirk: Just a minute young man, let me get my changepurse.
Bones: Now I can practice breast enhancement for both breasts! Yay!

Chekov: Vhat is that gravimetric interference throwing off our varp field?
Scotty: Obviously some kind of large celestial object passing through at near right angles to the plane of the star...<shoves fistful of Pringles into mouth>
Chekov: There it is again!

Picard: Surrender, Data! Or I will release the gas and beam it into your mouth!
Data: You will do that anyway!
Picard: What can I say, he knows me like Wesley knows skidmarks.

 

[Avro Arrow]

McCoy: This? It's just my anti-vertigo pills. I mean seriously, Jim, who the hell uses a mirror for a floor anyway?!

Chekov: Finally, I'm back in command while Kirk, Spock and Sulu are all down on Nimbus III.
Scott: Aye.
Chekov: The captain obviously recognizes command ability vhen he sees it. I vas first officer on the Reliant, you know.
Scott: Aye. Wasnae that the ship that you let get captured by a madman, who used it in his own personal quest?
Chekov: Don't vorry, I am sure that vill not happen again!

 

[2takesfrakes]

Doohan: "Shatner's daughter is a smokin' hotty!"
Keonig: "... vhat vonderful muscles."

 

[Armored Saint]

BONES: Trust me Jim, that Romulan ale is pure fucking dynamite.
KIRK: Bones, that's litterally pure fucking dynamite.
BONES: That's what I said, this is a fucking bomb.
KIRK: Bones, you have a fucking bomb in your hand.
BONES: Are you playing th parrot Jim?
KIRK: Bones, you have a fucking stick of dynamite in your hand.
BONES: For God's sake, that was I'm saying Jim. This Romulan ale gonna make an explosive night...

 

[Smellincoffee]

McCoy: Good evening sir, have you a moment to hear the good news about Kahless the Risen?

Chekov: Oh, my.
Sulu, OS: HEY!

Picard, chanting: On, on, you noblest English whose blood is fet from fathers of war-proof
- wait. Shakespeare is ENGLISH? Merde!

 

[Triskelion]

Picard: GET A LIFE!

 

[2takesfrakes]

PICARD: "Burger, shake & fries for $2.99? Let's land this puppy!"

 

[tharpdevenport]

JAWS: "Sub space candy gram."

Kirk: "Really? Wait a second -- you're that land shark, aren't you?"

 

[Nerys Myk]

MCCOY: Christ, Jim! This place hasn't changed since the Academy!

 

[Finn]

Koeing: *screaming*

Nicholas Meyer: Cut!…I had enough. I'd rather have Takei going "oh my" in that chair. Get him in here!

 

[Maurice]

Koeing: *screaming*
Nicholas Meyer: Cut!…I had enough. I'd rather have Takei going "oh my" in that chair. Get him in here!

SHATNER: Since when are you directing Star Trek V, Nick? Get off my set!

 

[datalal624]

Bones: "Sorry to bother you, Jim. Just thought I'd deliver that ex-lax you were asking for earlier. Oh, and Happy 50th Birthday, Jim."

Chekov: "My God, vat IS dat?"
Scotty: "Whatever it is, methinks it's something our insurance doesn't cover."
Chekov: "Ve haff insurance, Scotty? I didn't think ve needed dat in our utopic 23rd Century existence."
Scotty: "I don't know which is worse: The fact that you're dumb enough to fall for my joke, or that you're right...and I wish to God you weren't."

Picard: "*Sigh* Yet another dull conference to attend. Not even Gilbert and Sullivan can brighten my mood right now. Even a visit from Q would be preferable to this... And I hope I didn't think that too loudly..."

 

[shivkala]

Bones: Surprise!

Kirk: *sigh* You know, ten years ago, it would have been an Orian Slave Girl knocking on my door to wish me a happy birthday.

Bones: I suppose I could ask Uhura to come over and give you a fan dance.

Kirk: Tell her I'll promote her if she paints herself green.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Data: Pardon me, Captain, but do you have any Grey Poupon?

 

[Avro Arrow]

Picard: No, Enterprise, I'm not sure what's going on. He had his lights off when I passed him two systems ago, so I flashed my high-beams at him... and now he WON'T STOP FOLLOWING ME!

 

[Nerys Myk]

PICARD: Keep cool, Picard, There's no way he can know you have 50 cases of Romulan Ale in the back.

 

[tharpdevenport]

Scotty: "Laddie, the sheilds are nearly down, wee got casualties in engineering, and the enemy vessel is swinging back'a'round. Orders?"

Chekov: "I don't know vhat to do. Keptain, vhat should I do?

Checov: "Are you sure?"

Chekov: "I think I neehd a zecond opinion. Sulu?"

Chekov: "Vhery good. Meester Scott, set fire to Engineering."

 

[Candlelight]

Picard: He can fly a ship. He can anticipate tactical strategies. Clearly his brain is functioning. We've seen how he responds to threats. I wonder how he would respond...Mister Worf, do you know Skibadee and MC Infinity?

Worf: No sir. I have not had a chance to meet all the new crewmembers since I have been back.

Picard: They're MCs, Worf, ...from the twentieth century. Data was at a drum and bass gig just before he left. *singing* "USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH-USH"

 

[f14peter]

THE AWKWARD MOMENT AWARD: When Walter Koenig realizes he just flunked the "Who gets to be Captain of the Excelsior in Star Trek VI" audition

 

[tharpdevenport]

William Shatner: "CUT! Okay, Walter, let's do again, only this time try to act."