Voyager Caption Contest 119: Had a Bad Day

Discussion in 'Star Trek: Voyager' started by Captain Kathryn, Feb 23, 2014.

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  1. Captain Kathryn

    Captain Kathryn Commodore Commodore

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    Location:
    Captain Kathryn
    Greetings Voyager fans!!!

    Winners of the last contest and images for the new contest are up! Relish in your wins! A lot of these were too funny. :lol:

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    LOL had to pick two for this one.

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    Have fun everyone!!!!!!!!!!! :)

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  2. LeadHead

    LeadHead Director of Comedy Premium Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2000
    Location:
    On the Citadel or The TrekBBS Armada Starbase
    Thanks for the win! :bolian:

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    Paris: Oh, that reminds me, I was supposed to research Malcolm Reed's combat strategies.

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    Janeway: How bad is it, Doctor?

    The Doctor: You'll be fine, but I'd make nice with the insurance adjuster if I were you.

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    The Doctor: I didn't mean that nice with the Insurance adjuster!!

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    B'Elanna: While you're at it, would you implant a "clean up your own dang socks" command?

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    Janeway: I made dinner!

    Chakotay: (thinking) God help me.
     
  3. The Laughing Vulcan

    The Laughing Vulcan Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Jun 7, 2004
    Location:
    At The Laughing Vulcan's party...
    Thanks for the Say What? Here's another...

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    Paris: "Not... the blow job I was hoping for."

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    EMH: "I diagnose a bad hair day. I'd lend you my preventative subroutine, if you were a hologram."

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    EMH: "I'm sorry Captain, the bit that you were hoping for still hasn't been restored to normal size since last week's Caption competition."
    Janeway: "Well that was a waste."

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    Paris: "A little help here. Face-sucking alien. Call security!"
    Torres: "In a minute, Tom. That face-sucking thing is hilarious. Do it again."

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    The Maquis infiltration of the Voyager crew was finally complete. Chakotay had hypnotised Janeway into thinking she was a maid, everytime he said Akoochimoya.
     
  4. hux

    hux Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Oct 25, 2010
    Location:
    Hard Sassenach in Moist Aberdeen
    Thanks for the win(s)

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    Harry: This one time at band camp

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    Doctor: You're doing well captain, only five more men are waiting their turn

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    Doctor
    : I'm afraid Seven can't make it so she sent me...how can i help
    Janeway: Nevermind

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    Tuvok:
    My mind to your mind....i can sense that you're very good in bed Mr Paris

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    Chakotay: Remember when you murdered Tuvix
    Janeway: WTF!
     
  5. Finn

    Finn Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2006
    Location:
    Austin, TX
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    Doctor: Are you all right, Captain?

    Janeway: *grabs the Doc's uniform and pulls him toward her* Coffee!
     
  6. 2takesfrakes

    2takesfrakes Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Oct 13, 2013
    Location:
    Philadelphia, PA
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    "Security: Emergency in Captain's Quarters!"

    "I've already taken the proverbial phone off the hook, Kathryn ... we don't want to be disturbed."
     
  7. 2takesfrakes

    2takesfrakes Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Oct 13, 2013
    Location:
    Philadelphia, PA
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    "Maybe you should relax with the wine, Chakotay. You're going to get drunk."

    "But it takes the edge off the inevitable rejection I'm going to get from you."
     
  8. 2takesfrakes

    2takesfrakes Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Oct 13, 2013
    Location:
    Philadelphia, PA
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    "Captain, I know you've just been transported directly here, to sickbay, after a violent attack, but ... I want to talk to you about the possibility of my getting my own quarters, now that I'm mobile."
     
  9. 2takesfrakes

    2takesfrakes Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
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    Philadelphia, PA
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    "I won't stop playing this Tom, until you give me your permission to marry Linnis."
     
  10. 2takesfrakes

    2takesfrakes Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Oct 13, 2013
    Location:
    Philadelphia, PA
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    "Woo! Woo! Woo!... nyuk! nyuk! nyuk!"
     
  11. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk The Real Me Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    Down in the tube station at midnight
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    HARRY: Anything happening with the cobra?

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    EMH: Turns out I don't have a Hairdressing subroutine.

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    JANEWAY: I'll pass on the "happy ending", thanks.
     
  12. Mr. Laser Beam

    Mr. Laser Beam Fleet Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    May 10, 2005
    Location:
    The visitor's bullpen
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    Doctor: Captain, I must insist you get dressed at once.

    The Entire Female Population Of TrekBBS' Voyager Forum: Not so fast!!! :scream:
     
  13. Captain Kathryn

    Captain Kathryn Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2013
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    Captain Kathryn
  14. Mr. Laser Beam

    Mr. Laser Beam Fleet Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    May 10, 2005
    Location:
    The visitor's bullpen
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    Janeway: My God, Chakotay, haven't you had enough?

    Chakotay: The drunker I get, the better your cooking tastes.
     
  15. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Location:
    Open the door!
    TFTW Captain Kathryn!


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    Tom: I was feeling bad about not being able to win Kes, but you cheered me up as usual.
    Kim: Because of my jaunty licorice stick tune?
    Tom: No, because you play clarinet better than you play women - and you suck at clarinet.


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    Drunk again, Captain?
    No, I jus' can't find the floor.


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    EMH: Don't be modest, Captain. It's nothing I haven't seen before.

    ...On a dude.
     
  16. Armored Saint

    Armored Saint Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Oct 26, 2012
    Location:
    Quebec City
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    MCNEIL: YOU WIN! I will make out with Garrett on screen if it makes you stop writing stupid homosexual allegories.

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    PICARDO: If only we were on HBO...
     
  17. Roddenberry

    Roddenberry Lieutenant Commander Red Shirt

    Joined:
    Feb 6, 2014
    Location:
    Bristol, UK.
    Thanks for my win.

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    Paris: It's about time I told you the truth Harry, I knew taking you on the date was the only way for me to nail both the Delaney twins.

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    Janeway: I don't want to hear about the twelve steps Doctor, I can barely stand, let alone walk.

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    Doctor: But Voyager always has a happy ending Kathryn.
    Janeway: Not this time mister.

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    Barclay (pretending to be Vulcan): My mind to your mind, your mind to my mind....it's no good, nothing in there Paris.

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    Chakotay: About time Kathryn, finally learned your place is the kitchen and not the Captain of a Star Ship.
    Janeway (to herself): Wonder how smug you'll be when you discover the main course is fricassee de Spirit Animal.
     
  18. Finn

    Finn Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2006
    Location:
    Austin, TX
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    Janeway: Damn, where's that Chakotay!

    Doctor: He fell asleep on the toilet. I'm here for the annual check up you've been avoiding.
     
  19. Smellincoffee

    Smellincoffee Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    May 20, 2005
    Location:
    Heart of Dixie
    Thanks for the wins! :)

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    Paris: Jesus, Harry, are you trying to seduce me?
    Kim: It's been a long time, Tom. A long time.
    Paris: Get a hologram!

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    Doctor: Captain, are you -
    Janeway: Holy hell, doctor, that coffee has a kick to it.

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    Chakotay's got 99 problems, but a sammich ain't one.
     
  20. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
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    Open the door!
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    Barclay: "Ribbed - for his torture."
    B'Elanna: It's funny cause it's true!

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    Janes: Remember when Tom and I turned into lizards from the future?
    Chaks: Yes....
    Janes: How do you like your eggs?

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    EMH: From now on why not release your farts in small doses like other human beings?
     
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