TOS Caption Contest #277: That Which Captions

Discussion in 'Star Trek - Original Series' started by LeadHead, Sep 16, 2013.

  1. SciFi75

    SciFi75 Captain Captain

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2003
    Location:
    Taylor, MI
    [​IMG]
    Scotty: The top one makes a "whoop whoop" noise. The bottom one makes a "wheep wheep" noise.
    Spock: And what of the middle one, Mr Scott?
    Scotty: I dunno. I haven't turned it on yet, but the lads in engineering have laid odds that it makes a "wubba wubba" noise.
     
  2. SciFi75

    SciFi75 Captain Captain

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2003
    Location:
    Taylor, MI
    [​IMG]
    McCoy: Dammit, Jim! You didn't have to shoot the poor man for questioning your hairline.
    Kirk: I forgave him, but the toupee...the toupee can never forgive.
     
  3. SciFi75

    SciFi75 Captain Captain

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2003
    Location:
    Taylor, MI
    [​IMG]
    Kirk: She has no legs! She must come from an advanced race of beings that have forsaken the use of legs and managed to deter gravity by floating.
    Spock: ::sighs:: It is a hologram, Jim.
     
  4. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Location:
    To the Bat Tank!
    [​IMG]

    Kirk: She said she had to wash her hair...but the next day it was still done up in that braided contraption!
    Bones: We're starving and surrounded by predatorial humanoids, Jim. Give your Yeoman fetish a rest!


    [​IMG]

    Computer: Pingpingpingpingping....
    Scotty: Trouble alert.
    Computer: Beepboopbeepboopbeepboop....
    Scotty: System failure alert.
    Computer: You get a shiver in the dark, it's raining in the park, but meantime:
    South of the river, you stop and you hold everything....

    Scotty: Dire Straits alert.
    Spock: Notify me if it goes to Hanson Alert.

    [​IMG]

    Kirk: You call this a man cave?
    Spock: I detect no sign of refreshments, Captain.
     
  5. Timewalker

    Timewalker Cat-lovin', Star Trekkin' Time Lady Premium Member

    Joined:
    May 26, 2007
    Location:
    In many different universes, simultaneously.
    [​IMG]

    Kirk: Isn't that the babe from that old 20th century TV show "Time Tunnel"?
     
  6. Sir Rhosis

    Sir Rhosis Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2001
    Location:
    Cincinnati, OH
    [​IMG]
    HOLOGRAPIC ANN MacGREGOR: Doug, Tony? What the hell happened?

    KIRK: The name's Kirk.

    ANN: You're not General Kirk.

    I need a capper... anyone?
     
  7. Maurice

    Maurice Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2005
    Location:
    Walking distance from Starfleet HQ
    KIRK: No, I'm being specific.
     
  8. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Location:
    To the Bat Tank!
    [​IMG]

    Kirk: My skill with a phaser is legendary. Legendary!
    Bones: Those were our sandwiches, Jim.

    [​IMG]

    Mister Scott, there is a panel here with no lights blinking.
    They donnae all have to blink, Mister Spock!
    I will pretend I did not hear that, Engineer Scott.
     
  9. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk The Real Me Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    Down in the tube station at midnight
    [​IMG]

    MCCOY: Could you stop saying "Pew Pew" and put that thing away?
     
  10. IzzyAtWarp9

    IzzyAtWarp9 Commander Red Shirt

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2013
    Location:
    221C Baker Street
    [​IMG]

    Sulu: Captain, this rock is remarkable!
    Kirk: Indeed, Sulu
    (thinking) I wonder where I could get a haircut like that...
    McCoy: (thinking) I wonder where Jim could get a haircut like that...

    Bones: "He's not dead, Jim."


    [​IMG]

    Kirk: Beam us up, quickly Mr Scot! This planet is affecting us all! (bursts into tears) It's so depressing!
    Spock: What... is love?

    [​IMG]

    McCoy: Jim, help! He's controlling my eyebrows!
    Kirk: Leave his eyebrows alone or I WILL SHOOT YOOOU!!

    [​IMG]

    Scotty: Oh Mr Spock, it's the middle panel. It doesn't light up! DOESN'T LIGHT UP I TELL YOU! WHYYYYYYYYYY?????!!
    Spock: Doctor McCoy, come quickly, I think the effects from that planet have reached the ship
    Scotty: WWHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYY???????????!?!?!?!?!
     
  11. Jonas Grumby

    Jonas Grumby Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Jan 24, 2002
    Location:
    Somewhere in the South Pacific
    [​IMG]

    Spock: "You seem depressed, Mr. Scott."
    Scotty (lower lip trembling): "Oh, Mr. Spock! It's been a week now, and not a single soul has noticed my new hair style!"
     
  12. Mr. Laser Beam

    Mr. Laser Beam Fleet Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    May 10, 2005
    Location:
    The visitor's bullpen
    [​IMG]

    Scotty: Spock, these lights keep blinking out of sequence.

    Spock: I see.

    Scotty: What should I do about it, sir?

    Spock: Get them to blink IN sequence.
     
  13. Avro Arrow

    Avro Arrow Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    Jan 10, 2003
    Location:
    In Diefenbaker's Nightmares
    [​IMG]

    Scott: I'm tellin' you, Mr. Spock, you didnae have a brain at the time! You're nae gonna be able to use that wee device to remote-control Yeoman Ross!
     
  14. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk The Real Me Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    Down in the tube station at midnight
    [​IMG]

    SPOCK: I told you going to 11 was a bad idea.
     
  15. Avro Arrow

    Avro Arrow Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    Jan 10, 2003
    Location:
    In Diefenbaker's Nightmares
    [​IMG]

    As McCoy and Sulu stared in shock at the remains of Mr. Fluffy, Kirk slowly realized he did not, in fact, have his phaser set to "laser pointer".
     
  16. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Location:
    To the Bat Tank!
    [​IMG]

    Are ye satisfied, Mister Spock?
    I am indeed, Mister Scott. I am indeed.
     
  17. CaptainBearclaw

    CaptainBearclaw Lieutenant Commander Red Shirt

    Joined:
    Jul 17, 2013
    Location:
    not valid
    [​IMG]
    GIRL:I want to touch you...
    KIRK:I'M CONVINCED!
     
  18. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk The Real Me Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    Down in the tube station at midnight
    [​IMG]

    KIRK: Relax, Spock. I got this.
     
  19. JirinPanthosa

    JirinPanthosa Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2012
    [​IMG]

    SULU: The survey is complete Captain. We were unable to find any alien women on this planet.
    KIRK: Keep looking. I will finish my scavenger hunt!

    [​IMG]

    SCOTTY: Is that a tricorder or a children's toy?
    SPOCK: A children's toy, of course. It's baby's first tricorder. You couldn't tell by the plastic colorful buttons?
    SCOTTY: Oh. I mean, yeah, I was just testing you.

    [​IMG]

    KIRK: Wait, you mean that wasn't a hallucination caused by an all powerful entity?
    SULU: Nope, that was just some guy.
    KIRK: Crap.

    [​IMG]

    KIRK: What the hell is this? It doesn't look like me.
    SPOCK: No Captain. It's a mirror that reflects your innermost secret desires.
    KIRK: Um. No it's not.

    [​IMG]

    KIRK: ... ... ...
    SPOCK: I'm sorry to interrupt your dramatic pause, captain, but the planet is about to explode.
     
  20. Jonas Grumby

    Jonas Grumby Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Jan 24, 2002
    Location:
    Somewhere in the South Pacific
    [​IMG]

    Spock: "I see your colorful, lighted buttons have burned out."
    Scotty: "Aye. Do ye know where I can get some more?"
    Spock (angles face of handheld device away from Scotty): "Uh, no."