TOS Caption Contest # 265.. "Primitive Screw-heads!"

Discussion in 'Star Trek - Original Series' started by MANT!, Aug 25, 2012.

  1. MANT!

    MANT! Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 14, 2005
    Location:
    in Atomo-vision
    First..the..(Drum Roll)


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    Winners!


    And..

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    Chopshop winnah!!
    Lots of good entries, don't think I didn't laugh at them..

    On to the next...

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    Enjoy!
     
  2. dodge

    dodge Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2003
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    Kirk: "Spock, are you sure these will protect us from landsharks?"
     
  3. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk The Real Me Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    Down in the tube station at midnight
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    KIRK: Dammit woman, what did you say to him?

    YEOMAN: I said he was cute and asked him out.


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    Guys somewhere

    Okay freeze frame and zoom. I know I saw it!!!!!!

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    STONE AGE GUMBY: My brain hurts!

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    KIRK: Remember on Lost when Sawyer and Kate were locked in cages?

    SPOCK: Yes and.....

    KIRK: Nothing, this just reminds of that.
     
  4. UFO

    UFO Captain Captain

    Joined:
    Apr 6, 2010
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    Krik: Could you give us a minute buddy?


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    Chekov: I like your boots. What did you say they are called again?

    Caveman: Ugg


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    Kirk: Our captors do realise we can fit between these bars, right?

    Spock: I believe the cages are symbolic Captain.

    Kirk: Ah, of course, ... what?
     
  5. Bubbles McGee

    Bubbles McGee Lieutenant Commander

    Joined:
    Jul 25, 2012
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    Kirk: Spock, what is it?

    Spock: Curious, Captain. There seem to be a large flock of over-sized irate feathered winged bipedal endothermic vertebrate gathering near some sort of catapult device just over the rise back there.

    Kirk: Oh #@*$!
     
  6. Maurice

    Maurice Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2005
    Location:
    Walking distance from Starfleet HQ
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    SHATNER: What happened to him?
    ACTRESS: The director told him how many of his lines you took.
    TAKEI: En...sem...ble.
    SHATNER: In your dreams!



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    KIRK: Now, gang, I'll tear off her mask and we'll see who really tried to convince us this planet was haunted. <riiiip> Uh...uh oh...


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    CHEKOV: Leg varmers? Ve must be on the planet of the 80s.



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    KIRK: Worst. Shellgame. Ever.
     
  7. Smellincoffee

    Smellincoffee Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    May 20, 2005
    Location:
    Heart of Dixie
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    Kirk: These people have been living here for milennia, and they've never mastered the rudiments of agriculture?
    Chekov: No, sir, but they have at least managed to register with GEICO Car Insurance.
     
  8. The Laughing Vulcan

    The Laughing Vulcan Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Jun 7, 2004
    Location:
    At The Laughing Vulcan's party...
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    Sulu: "Kiss me, Hardy..."
    Kirk: "Hornblower, not Nelson."

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    Cloud William: "What you do with post-op Cloud Festus?"

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    Chekov: "Vhere do you get your vigs?"

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    Kirk: "I hate these Vietnam allegory episodes!"
     
  9. R. Star

    R. Star Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Jun 15, 2012
    Location:
    Shangri-La
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    Sulu was just holding out for mouth to mouth.

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    Kirk: She's so easy, a caveman could do her!

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    Chekov: The furry booties were an original Russian invention!
    Kirk: I wouldn't brag about that Chekov.

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    Kirk: Seriously, could we get imprisoned in a technologically advanced prison just once? It's animated, it's not like there are budget issues!
     
  10. Jonas Grumby

    Jonas Grumby Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Jan 24, 2002
    Location:
    Somewhere in the South Pacific
    Thanks for the win, MANT!

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    Kirk: "Granted, Yeoman, he's not exactly what you'd call 'smooth' when it comes to conversing with women. Still, you didn't have to slug him quite that hard."


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    Kirk: "What's that you say, Sirah? I can have you, but only after I pay the guy in the fur coat? Why does all this seem vaguely familiar?"


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    Morg: "The women? The women all live underground, completely separated from us men."
    Chekov: "I suppose dat vould explain your grooming habits."
     
    Last edited: Aug 25, 2012
  11. LeadHead

    LeadHead Director of Comedy Premium Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2000
    Location:
    On the Citadel or The TrekBBS Armada Starbase
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    Kirk: Sulu, what happened to you?!

    Sulu: Forced... to... watch....reality tv.... (dies)



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    Kirk: This guy doesn't know either. I knew it was a mistake to stop and ask for directions...

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    Spock: Captain, why are you smiling?

    Kirk: These Amazonian women are supposed to be a lot of fun...
     
  12. Mr. Laser Beam

    Mr. Laser Beam Fleet Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
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    The visitor's bullpen
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    Kirk: Ensign Gaga, please assist me with the lieutenant.
     
  13. T'Girl

    T'Girl Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2009
    Location:
    T'Girl
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    Kirk: "The Federation is a instrument of civilization."

    Cloud: "Says man in corner, hiding behind woman."

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    Kirk
    : "Is there anything we can do for you Sulu?"

    Sulu
    (mumbling): "A MMF three-way would be nice."

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    Spock suddenly realized that Kirk's idea of shore leave on the Bondage and Domination planet wasn't going to be the "fun" that Kirk said it would be.

    (Kirk: "Spock, I know this place where the Dominatrix are sooo ...")

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    Kirk: "Diplomacy and reason don't seem to be working."

    Chekov
    : "How about I shoot him in the testicles with my 'fire box.' See if that works"

    :)


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    Last edited: Aug 26, 2012
  14. TrickyDickie

    TrickyDickie Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    Jan 9, 2003
    Location:
    The sunny slopes of long ago....
    Thanks for the win! :D

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    Chris Pine and Zachary Quinto are less than impressed with the re-imagining of 'The Cage.'
     
  15. TrickyDickie

    TrickyDickie Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    Jan 9, 2003
    Location:
    The sunny slopes of long ago....
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    Kirk: "We know that you're one of those pagans from 'Dragnet: 1987'....the goat leggings prove it!"

    Chekov: "Vhat....?!?"
     
  16. dodge

    dodge Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2003
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    Mulberry Sellers: There's gold in them thar hills!
     
  17. BoredShipCapt'n

    BoredShipCapt'n Commodore Commodore

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    a sonic shower
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    Kirk: "Well, Sulu, now that you're all fixed up in your android body, what shall we do with your old one here?"
     
  18. BoredShipCapt'n

    BoredShipCapt'n Commodore Commodore

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    Kirk: "Stay calm and don't move! ... That's the biggest damn tribble I ever saw."
     
  19. BoredShipCapt'n

    BoredShipCapt'n Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2012
    Location:
    a sonic shower
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    Morg: "Uh-oh! It is time to change my loincloth."

    Kirk: "Chekov, you handle this."
     
    Last edited: Aug 28, 2012
  20. BoredShipCapt'n

    BoredShipCapt'n Commodore Commodore

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    Kirk: "Well, so far the diplomatic mission to Gilligan's Planet doesn't seem to be a success."