Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #476: Back to work

[LeadHead]

Hello and welcome to the new Caption contest!

First up to the plate, we have the "Big Mistake" Award, going to Jedman67 for:

Unbeknownst to LaForge, this incident would mark the turning point in his career when he would be permanently stuck to the bottom of Starfleets promotion list, after it was discovered that he had switched the label for the replicator's "Earl Grey" module with "Quarktajino."



Next, we have the "Overreaction" Award, going to JirinPanthosa for:

ANYA: If he slips, he could damage the ship's navigation system, leading to a slight delay in our arrival! Well, go ahead. Kill him.
WORF: I like your approach to problem solving.



Next, we have the "Scheduling Disaster" Award, going to Triskelion for:

LaForge: Damn, there goes my Saturday night!
Ensign: Sure, Chief.


Next, we have the "Why doesn't he just ask Picard for his password?" Award, going to Captain April for:

Data: Sir, I'm afraid no matter how much you fiddle with my receptors, I'll never be able to pick up HBO for you.



Next, we have the "Everyone always comes to LeadHead with their problems, but LeadHead does not mind. LeadHead trained in crisis management!" going to shivkala for:

Riker: Hurry up, Geordi, we're running out of time!

Geordi: Cannot run out of time. There is infinite time. You are finite. Geordi is finite. THIS is wrong tool.


Our Photoshop Award, goes to Nerys Myk for:

GEORDI: I'm liking where this is headed.

The Captain's Log Award goes to Finn for:

First Officer's Log: I put in a memory of me winning at poker last night and that Data owes me....a lot

Given my recent tardiness, I wanted to bring back some of our special awards.

The Award goes to Hutchy01 for:

Geordi: After I put this bomb on the safe, we hide behind the console, wait for the explosion, grab the money, then head for the main shuttlebay.

The Award goes to inflatabledalek for:

Riker: Hurry up will you, I want this creepy bearded sex pest off the ship. I don't know how people can behave like that.

Why have you both gone awkwardly silent?

Our KBL goes to The Laughing Vulcan for:

Riker: "What is it?"
Geordi: "It's to help us go."
Wesley: "Yeah, that exchange program with the Pakleds was a great idea."


Many thanks to everyone who participated and congrats to our winners!

And now, the new contest!

Enjoy!

 

[LeadHead]

La Forge: Wait, if we're all here, who's driving?

Picard: Ah, there's my comfy Captain's chair.

Worf: Rubbing it in is dishonorable.

Picard: Don't get too comfortable there, Mister La Forge. I may rearrange Helm and Ops multiple times in the next few episodes.

Duras: Fine, I'll make my own High Council! With Blackjack!

Worf: Not this again...

Picard: Counselor, if you changed my Space Radio stations again...

 

[shivkala]

Thanks for the win!

Crusher: You never realize just how ugly your ship is until you're on a Starbase watching it through a window.

Picard: I hope we've settled things between you two for good. Incidentally, if you ever need anyone to measure you two again, please ask Mr. Data.

Picard: Ensign Noname, please get out of the chair, a named character needs it. Also, don't go far, Commander Riker, Worf, and Data are going on an Away Mission and I want you to join it.

Worf: The answer's no, Duras.

Duras: No?

Worf: Yes, what are you, deaf and stupid? I said no!

Duras: What's wrong, Son of Mogh? Chicken?

Worf: What did you call me, Duras?

Duras: Chicken, Son of Mogh.

Worf: Nobody...calls me.....chicken.

Picard: Why doesn't anyone announce me anymore? Look, I'm going to go back into the Turbolift, come out again, and Mr. Worf, you're going to announce, "Captain on the Bridge!"

Worf: Sir, we've been through this, just as soon as I start doing it again, you get annoyed with it, tell me it's obvious you're here, and that I shouldn't announce you.

Picard: Look, it's my ship, if I want to be announced, I'm going to be announced. Now, here I go back into the Turbolift and when the doors open again, say, "Captain on the Bridge!"

Worf: Captain on the Bridge!

Picard: I didn't go all the way back into the Turbolift, Mr. Worf. Okay, give it a few seconds, the doors will close and then re-open and then you...

Worf: Captain on the Bridge!

Picard: Not. Yet. Give it a...

Worf: Captain on the Bridge!

Picard: Wait until I leave, first!

Worf: Do I announce you leaving?

Picard: You know what, forget the whole thing. Just forget...

Worf: Captain on the Bridge!

Picard: *sigh*

 

[Triskelion]

T4TW Leadhead!

Ensign: She's docked, Captain. You can put the hat back on.
Picard: Next time spring for a spare lighthouse bulb.

Riker: Aren't you both coming to the briefing?
Picard: We were TOLD there would be CAKE.

Picard: Hurry Geordi and take the helm before the women come back and we have to explain why we're lost.

Duras: What is that doing there?
Picard: That's Worf, our Chief of Security.
Duras: No I mean my Miss Uncongeniality ribbon from the Chancellor of the QorN Pageant.
Worf: You are just upset because I have been able to fulfill all of my QorN duties.

Riker: How was the MILF convention on Risa sir?
Picard: I haven't run over the hill so many times since my marathon days.

 

[Triskelion]

Picard: I'm going to kick Berlinghoff Rasmussen's ass.

 

[Jedman67]

Thanks for the win @LeadHead!

Worf: "Why does he always get to use the bathroom first?
Riker: "Captain's privilege, Mr. Worf."

Picard: "Why is there so much smoke on your bridge?"
Duras: "Budget. Mike wanted to do more than just a chair and a wall with some blinkies, Doug found a fog machine, and Rick was complaining we were too far behind schedule and just start shooting. Stupid targ!"
Worf: "There is no honor in having a budget!!"

The Enterprise crew eagerly awaits their ride to the Rio Olympics.

 

[Finn]

Thanks for the log win

Data: Why are we just standing here?
Geordi: It looks like they don't have a bar where we can spent hours playing on the holodeck, playing darts and having drinks with O'Brien

Braga: Damn it, we should have put in the mini-fridge right there where Worf gets his chilled prune juice during on duty.

Picard: Get Lost! We have no idea who you are. You don't get pay enough for more screen time.

Klingon: Over my dead body, you'll have to kill the chancellor before I'll allow you to be in my presence.

 

[tharpdevenport]

Picard: "Mr. Worf?"

Worf: "Sir, I am experiecing nIb'poH -- the feeling we have done caption #475 before."

 

[Mutai Sho-Rin]

Picard: "Mr. Worf?"

Worf: "Sir, I am experiecing nIb'poH -- the feeling we have done caption #475 before."

Updated to #476 by the ever-vigilant (pesty) mod.

 

[Jedman67]

http://www.trekbbs.com/threads/tng-caption-this-303-he-has-claimed-the-right-of-captioning.202312/ FYI

 

[LeadHead]

Just to clear up that confusion, the photobucket says 298 because that's how many contests I've run. I'm not the first to be doing this contest.

Thanks for fixing the numbers Mutai Sho-Rin.

 

[Leviathan]

La Forge: Wait, if we're all here, who's driving?

Data: Well...Troi is not here. She can drive right?

 

[Leviathan]

Picard: Go to Red Alert. All crew with 'Main Character Shields' to battle stations.

 

[Nerys Myk]

PICARD: Damn it, Number One! I said get rid of that chair! I'm tired of people from the lower decks coming up here and plopping themselves down in that chair like they belong on the Bridge!
TROI: I'm sensing... hostility...anger...

PICARD: Okay. Let up on the clutch and give it some gas....

CREWMAN: Sorry sir, I learned on an automatic.

PICARD: From now on I'm avoiding the turbolift on Taco Tuesday.

KURN: I have to know, Brother. What's your secret Why does your hair always look so shiny and perfect?
WORF: It's called a comb.

PICARD: How the hell did you lock the keys inside?

 

[Smellincoffee]

Picard: The first person to say "It's only a model" gets transferred to night watch.

Picard: Clear the deck, night watch. The A-team is back and ready for war. LEMME HEAR YOUR WAR CRY!
Worf, Riker, others half-heartedly: A-team, A-team, yay.

Picard: Ensign Ta...Ta...(muttering) T-something, what was it?.
(awkward pause)
Er, Ensign, please take up the auxiliary science post.
LaForge, whispering: At least he didn't call you "Broccoli", Simon. Poor Reg.

Duras: You can't spurn me, Worf! You need at least nine other Klingons to form a quorum for a proper back-spurning!

Picard: Commander Worf? What's the matter?
Worf: Commander Riker was in your chair.
Picard: Yes, he had the conn.
Worf: He and Counselor Troi *both* were.
..simultaneously.
Troi: I know nothing.

 

[tharpdevenport]

Little known fact: the turbolift was on the left, and the one-man head was on the right.....

 

[Laura Cynthia Chambers]

screenshot windows 7
Picard: *whistling*
Worf: "Captain, there is a-"
Riker: "Shh! Don't tell him. That'll spoil the fun."

or

There are two Klingons in this picture. Can you spot them both?

 

[Leviathan]

Orfil Qintaros Personal Log: By carefully standing so that they only see my back I have fooled the crew into believing I am Picard. Soon I shall take over the Enterprise and then....then...ummm....conquer the Galaxy or something...

 

[Catarina]

You are without honor! Our people don't condition their hair like Federation, Worf.

 

[inflatabledalek]

TFTW LH!

Worf: Hey, this is a nice table...Someone distract the Picard wannabe and I'll nick it. It'd look good in engineering...

Riker: How do we have 5000ft corridor leading to the Observation Lounge when it's right behind the bridge anyway?

Extra: Heeeeeeelp....ggggarrrgghhhhhh....can't...huggghhhhhhh.....breath.....

Stewart: See, I said the uniforms are too tight!

Duras: Oh hi Worf! I want to return that torch and fog machine you leant me, but do you think I can find them?

Picard: So how had I never heard of Risa anyway when it turns out every single person in the future goes there on holiday? That'd be like no hearing of Barbados... What has my life become?