TNG Caption This! 327: False King

Discussion in 'Star Trek: The Next Generation' started by LeadHead, Sep 16, 2013.

  1. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Geordi: - So after we arrive in Sector Twenty, we'll transfer the shipment -
    Troi: Quiet - someone is about to lose their virginity. Oh never mind. It's just Wesley's left hand.

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    Picard: Number One, set a course for the easy bake oven cupcake.
    Riker: He's baked again.
     
  2. Happy Xmas (War Is Over)

    Happy Xmas (War Is Over) Fleet Admiral Premium Member

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    RIKER: Computer, play "Love In An Elevator". Authorization: Riker 0025942.
     
  3. Finngle Bells

    Finngle Bells Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Picard: Damn it, Wil! I told you not to let her drive again!
     
  4. Gil T.Azell

    Gil T.Azell Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Cast: all thinking this episode is going to suck.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 17, 2013
  5. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Data: Watch out for his bishop! He'll have your King in seven moves! Use the 4D Zuckertort Reversal! The 4D Zuckertort!

    Picard: Our Science Officer started out as a Gameboy CD.
     
  6. Happy Xmas (War Is Over)

    Happy Xmas (War Is Over) Fleet Admiral Premium Member

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    Picard was not amused when Wesley streaked through Ten Forward.
     
  7. IzzyAtWarp9

    IzzyAtWarp9 Commander Red Shirt

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    Crusher: Look at me! I've got no neck!
    Picard: Doctor Crusher, stop that at once! We have serious business to conduct with the representatives from this world
    Representive-braided-hair-woman: Look at me! I'm a chess table!
    Picard:... OK then, carry on

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    Troi: Geordi, before I give you any type of counselling I would feel more comfortable if you put some trousers on

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    Picard: Numba One, help! Someone's been messing around with the superglue!
    Riker: Oh this is going straight on Spacebook

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    Geordi: Captain, help! I'm stuck to you!
    Riker: Worf, help! I'm stuck to you!
    Data: Captain I appear to be stuck to the computer console
    Picard: DAMN SUPERGLUUUUUUUUUUE!!!

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    Picard: Hmm... those buttons remind me of a song... (starts humming)
    Data: Captain, are you about to start singing?
    Crusher: (bursts in) Am I late? Did I miss it? (starts beating tiny drum and dancing)
    Data: Captain, is this really-
    Picard: LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  8. Holdfast

    Holdfast Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    TFTW!!


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    CRUSHER (thinking): Oh God, he's eyeing up the chess set again, isn't he? I hate having to play that game with him... is it too soon to fake a headache again?



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    TROI: I'm going to look away and pretend I didn't see a Goddess of Empathy screensaver on your laptop there.



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    PICARD: I know I say it every time, but that really is the last time I party with the Duras sisters.

    EDIT - whoops, I see Velocity already beat me to - essentially - this punchline. How about instead:

    PICARD: I don't know why you're laughing, Riker. You're due in sickbay next.



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    PICARD: It's simply unacceptable, Mr Data.
    DATA: Aye sir, I'll have the carpet relaid immediately.



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    CRUSHER: I love you.
    PICARD: I know.
    <carbonite freezes her in place>
    DATA: Well, that was weird...
     
  9. R. Star

    R. Star Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Thanks for the win! :)

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    Crusher: A stable wormhole?
    Picard: It leads to the Gamma Quadrant. Just think of the exploration the Federation could do there.
    Crusher: What if there's a vast xenophobic interplanetary empire behind it that wants to invade?
    Picard: War? What a primitive concept. That will never happen.


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    Troi: Women trouble again? -sigh- I'll clear out three hours next week.

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    Riker: Problem sir?
    Picard: Oh no, Number One. I've just been making it so. That's why the inertial dampeners have been shaking, I've been rocking the boat.

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    Picard: I don't know who you people think you are, but I want to know why masking tape is on my clean floor. Mr. Data, clean this up.
    Data: Aye sir, switching from blow mode, to suck mode.



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    Picard: Ah, Dr Crusher, good. Please wait in my ready room. Number one, you have the bridge. I shall be making a.... log entry.
     
  10. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Picard: Launch a probe into the anomaly.
    Crusher: Did someone say anal probe?
    All: NO!
    Data: It is statistically improbable that she misunderstood.


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    Geordi: I feel that women ignore me.
    Troi: Hm? Has that fish always been there?
     
  11. Jonas Grumby

    Jonas Grumby Vice Admiral Admiral

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    LaForge: "Odd that he'd just leave them lying out like that. Didn't think anyone would be coming in here, I guess."
    Troi: "The captain's speedo. One those things you just assume you'll never actually get a chance to see."
    LaForge: "Wanna try 'em on? I did."
     
  12. LeadHead

    LeadHead Director of Comedy Premium Member

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