TNG Caption This! 306: Second Captions

Discussion in 'The Next Generation' started by LeadHead, Feb 24, 2013.

  1. LeadHead

    LeadHead Director of Comedy Premium Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2000
    Location:
    On the Citadel or The TrekBBS Armada Starbase
    Happy Saturday Everyone!


    [​IMG]

    First up to the plate, we have the "Diplomatic Incident" Award, going to:

    Next, we have the "Noise Complaint" Award, going to:

    Next, we have the "Do the Math, people!" Award, going to:

    Next, we have the "Costume Fail" Award, going to:

    Next, we have the "Can't you jazz it up a bit?" Award, going to:


    Some great photoshops this time around, and this one made me laugh the most, so it gets the prize!


    [​IMG]


    [​IMG]

    Many thanks to everyone who participated and congratulations to our winners! Thanks for continuing on the Captain's Log Award, I've been so happy with the results!

    And now, we continue forward in our journey through the 7 seasons of TNG, we arrive at "Second Chances" for when one Riker isn't enough.

    Another thing, I honestly do not know when I will end this contest and start the next one. Next weekend will be jam packed for me, and no offense to you all, but probably, if I were I would end up losing sleep time and as it stands I'll be lucky to get 5 hours a night. But not to worry, I'll get things moving once I have the chance!

    And now, the new contest!

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    Enjoy!
     
  2. LeadHead

    LeadHead Director of Comedy Premium Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2000
    Location:
    On the Citadel or The TrekBBS Armada Starbase
    [​IMG]

    Riker's trombone playing was so bad, it often triggered the Red Alert Alarms.

    [​IMG]

    Riker: How did Deanna get up there?!

    [​IMG]

    Worf: Okay, you two, go ten paces, turn around, then draw.

    [​IMG]

    Troi: Beverly, we're supposed to be doing martial arts not Lamaze breathing exercises.

    [​IMG]

    Riker: Whoops, hope that Tricorder wasn't very valuable!
     
  3. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk Fleet Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    Down in the tube station at midnight
    [​IMG]

    CRUSHER:I don't wanna be a chicken. I don't wanna be a duck. I don't wanna be a chicken. I don't wanna be a duck. So I shake my butt. na na na na na na na na na na na na I don't wanna be a chicken i don't wanna be a duck so I shake my butt. I don't wanna be a chicken. I don't wanna be a duck. na na na na na na na na na na na na I don't wanna be a chicken. I don't wanna be a duck. So I shake my butt. I don't wanna be a chicken. I don't wanna be a duck. na na na na na na na na na na na na
     
  4. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk Fleet Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    Down in the tube station at midnight
    [​IMG]

    BOTH RIKERS (thinking): At least I didn't get fat.
     
  5. JirinPanthosa

    JirinPanthosa Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2012
    [​IMG]

    Riker only joined the jazz band to hit on the pianist, to finish his 'alien sex' checklist.

    [​IMG]

    DATA: Commander Riker, inquiry. Why has Captain Picard stripped off his clothes, and started dancing..."
    RIKER: I only gave him one beer. I suppose it's been so long he's lost all his tolerance.

    [​IMG]

    WILL RIKER: This can't possibly be me, no way I'm that sleazy. If it were me I'd be much more funny and charming!

    [​IMG]

    TROI: Beverly, you know the movie Karate Kid isn't real karate, right?
    BEVERLY: Next time the ship is invaded, CRANE KICK!

    [​IMG]

    WILL RIKER (Several years ago): Maybe I should ask Deanna to marry me. Nah, now's not the time. I'm going to be the youngest Captain in Starfleet. First command I'm offered, I'm going to take it. Then I'll ask her, then she'll be mine.
     
  6. shivkala

    shivkala Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2004
    Location:
    Patrolling Sector 2814
    TFTW, Leadhead, good luck this coming week!

    [​IMG]

    Deanna: Wow, Will really blows!

    Data: "Blows?" Ah, "To produce a sound by expelling a current of air, as in sounding a wind instrument or a whistle."

    Deanna: I'm so glad Dr. Soong didn't install the "Urban Dictionary" software patch for your dictionary app.

    [​IMG]

    Riker: I'll be damned, there really is a ceiling cat!

    [​IMG]

    Will and Thomas: I can't stay mad at you, you handsome bastard!

    [​IMG]

    Crusher: You and Will, I mean Thomas? Really? Weren't you seeing the ambassador from Tentaclus V? The one with the *motions with her hands*, and the *motions with her hands*, and the really big *motions with her hands*?

    [​IMG]

    Thomas: You'll never retrieve the database! You'll die before ya get it!
    Will *offscreen*: Hey! What's that you got on your face?
    Thomas: Huh?
    *Will throws dirt on Thomas's face*
    Will *offscreen*: See how that works?
     
  7. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk Fleet Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    Down in the tube station at midnight
    [​IMG]

    PICARD: Now that you've warmed up, lets hear what you've got.

    RIKER" Warmed up? That was our first number!

    PICARD: Ah yes..."Jazz".
     
  8. Mr. Laser Beam

    Mr. Laser Beam Fleet Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    May 10, 2005
    Location:
    The visitor's bullpen
    [​IMG]

    Beverly: Make fun of the way I say "croissant" one more time and I'll strangle you.
     
  9. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Location:
    Megalopolis
    TFTKBLA LeadHead! :klingon::klingon::klingon:

    [​IMG]

    Data: Freebird!


    [​IMG]

    Riker: Go to UV scan, Data.
    All: Eeew!
    Riker: Long time to be alone.
    Data: I suggest we ask Commander LaForge how to proceed, sir.


    [​IMG]

    Thomas: Did Deanna ever tell you about her...special fetish?
    Will: Yes. I know everything you know from that time. Did you know about her <whispers in his ear>
    Thomas <startled>: No way! That's not even possible, is it?
    Will <nods>: We've encountered a few new alien species since you've been gone.


    [​IMG]

    Beverly: Kwaaay-sawnt! Kwaaaaaay-SAWNT!
    Troi: Damned French zombie apocalypse.


    [​IMG]

    While you're down there get my frisbee!
     
  10. Mistral

    Mistral Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Dec 5, 2007
    Location:
    Between the candle and the flame
    GoldShirt Riker: "You realize you are doomed, yes?"

    Redshirt Riker: "Why, because I'm wearing a red shirt? That's a myth!"

    Goldshirt Riker: "No, because all of these heavily armed people work for me."
     
  11. Mistral

    Mistral Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Dec 5, 2007
    Location:
    Between the candle and the flame
    "Damn, turkeys really can't fly!"
     
  12. Riker's beard

    Riker's beard Cadet Newbie

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2011
    Location:
    Glasgow
    [​IMG]
    Crusher:.....He pushed me onto the table, grabbed me by the ankles and....
    Troi: Uh I don't think that was a performance evaluation Beverley.
     
  13. Mojochi

    Mojochi Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    Aug 18, 2007
    [​IMG]

    Crusher: Sounds like a flatulent goose

    Troi: Yeah, & his trombone playing isn't very good either

    [​IMG]

    Riker: Jesus, On Bluray, Deanna's makeup looks like a French prostitute's

    [​IMG]

    Will: Count yourself luck, Pal. I've exterminated clones of me almost as developed as you.

    [​IMG]

    Troi: NO! God dammit! You're not invisible yet! Give it up, moron!

    [​IMG]

    Tom decided to pay one last visit to the masturbation cave
     
  14. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Location:
    Megalopolis
    :rommie:

    Troi: You dance like a multi-legged creature on a hotplate.
     
  15. Ln X

    Ln X Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2011
    Location:
    The great gig in the sky
    [​IMG]
    Double bass player: Erm commander, looks like the front is falling off...

    [​IMG]
    Captain's log supplemental: The hunt continues for a swarm of spiders which turns my crew into a bunch of sissies...

    [​IMG]
    Riker: There's something even worse than an arrogant upshot jerk; my transporter duplicate.

    [​IMG]
    Beverly: -and then you get on top of him, hands upon his shoulders and you be the dominant one.
    Troi: Wow, I never knew you were so passionate about making love!
    Beverly: It's all I can think about in my spare time...
    Troi: The captain is still giving you the cold shoulder?
    Beverly: He hasn't a clue what he's missing.

    [​IMG]
    Thomas Riker: Argh! Snakes in a crate!
     
  16. Mistral

    Mistral Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Dec 5, 2007
    Location:
    Between the candle and the flame
    Riker: "What is it, Data?"

    Data: "I believe its an attempt by intelligent amphimbians to breach the hull, based on the amount of water coming through the deck."

    Worf: "We need to break out our phasers!!!!"

    Technician: "Dr. Crusher's been using the shower head to have an orgasm. The pipes can't handle that long of a continuous flow. It happens every Wednesday. Just get out of the way and I'll patch it."
     
  17. Ln X

    Ln X Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2011
    Location:
    The great gig in the sky
    [​IMG]
    Troi: Beverly what are you doing?
    Beverly: I'm Alvin the Chipmunk. Cheep, cheep!
    Troi: :wtf:
     
  18. Ln X

    Ln X Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2011
    Location:
    The great gig in the sky
    [​IMG]
    Captain's log supplemental: The installation of punishment booths has been effective indeed at maintaining crew discipline, especially the pits of flesh-eating scarab beetles...
     
  19. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Location:
    Megalopolis
    [​IMG]

    Bass Player: At least it's not that pretentious robot.


    [​IMG]

    Data: The light bulb needs to be changed, sir.
    Riker: I'll put it in my report to Starfleet. Where's that engineering team? We need to determine it's manufacture.
    Worf: Shoot it out, Commander!
    Engineer: Good thing I trained all those years as a warp field specialist. <Breaks out hand torch>
    Worf & Riker: Whoa!
    Data: WTF? <performs internal diagnostic>


    [​IMG]

    Thomas <out of the corner of his mouth>: Don't look now, Commander. There is one behind me disguised in an officer's uniform.

    Will: Klingons are our allies now.

    Thomas: There's a Klingon too?


    [​IMG]

    Crusher: Next distract your opponent with "The Camel Toe Maneuver."


    [​IMG]

    Thomas: Watch out for the Cave Monster!
    Will: It's just an old blow up doll - that looks like Deanna.
    Thomas: Oh, so that's where that went.
     
  20. Captain April

    Captain April Commander Red Shirt

    Joined:
    Feb 23, 2012
    Location:
    ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha
    [​IMG]

    Data was practising using his new practical joke circuit. Rubbing Riker's mouthpiece with Spot's faeces was going down a treat with the audience.


    [​IMG]

    Crusher: I hate this new uniform. I have to stand this way all the time or else my bust disappears completely.

    [​IMG]

    Rikers (in unison): I see what you mean. This beard does look shit.