TNG Caption This! 303: He has claimed the right of captioning!

Discussion in 'The Next Generation' started by LeadHead, Feb 3, 2013.

  1. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Captain's Log, Supplemental: My Craigslist ad for "Hot Betazoid Babes" is not having the desired response.

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    Riker: Do you really think we should be placing personal ads on the Captain's behalf?
    Crusher: He disparaged my croissants. Now how do you spell "xenerotica fetish"?
     
    Last edited: Feb 4, 2013
  2. Holdfast

    Holdfast Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    17 Cherry Tree Lane
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    K'EHLYER (panicked, thinking): C'mon doors, c'mon! Close, dammit, before he turns around and sees me!



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    DURAS: Buns of Steel, indeed, Worf.



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    It was more obvious when Picard & Riker fell asleep than when Geordi did.



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    DURAS: Twelve hookers and as much blow as you can handle. That's my final offer, Arbiter. Choose me as Chancellor!
    GOWRON: Bah! Twelve hookers and more blow than you can handle. Look at my eyes, Picard, you know I know what I'm talking about.



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    CRUSHER: That's certainly a lot of contacts to trace.
    RIKER: You need to scroll down some more.



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    ENTERPRISE-D: I came here to chew through dilithium crystals and kick ass... and I'm all out of dilithium crystals.





    ooh, one more...

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    Always Outnumbered. Sadly quite often Outgunned...
     
  3. TiberiusMaximus

    TiberiusMaximus Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

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    Captain's Log, Supplemental: I knew we should have taken that left turn at Albuquerque IV!
     
  4. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Crusher: My God, Will - Two and a Half Men was just the Andy Griffith show in Malibu!

    Riker: Damn you Progenitors!!!
     
  5. Isis

    Isis Commodore Commodore

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    Captain's log, Stardate 45345.6. We're being attacked, three ships to our one. What am I doing making a log entry?
     
  6. Mistral

    Mistral Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Between the candle and the flame
    "Captain's Log, Stardate 63789.2- The senior staff assembled this afternoon for some kind of briefing. I am not sure what it was about, as I slept through the whole boring thing."
     
  7. Jonas Grumby

    Jonas Grumby Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Somewhere in the South Pacific
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    "Captain's Log, personal reminder: Must remember to speak to Mr. Data about his incessantly staring at Ambassador K'Ehleyr's breasts."
     
    Last edited: Feb 5, 2013
  8. Captain April

    Captain April Commander Red Shirt

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    ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha
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    Crusher: It keeps saying PC LOAD LETTER.

    Riker: What the fu..!
     
  9. Jonas Grumby

    Jonas Grumby Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
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    Somewhere in the South Pacific
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    Crusher: "I found some stuff Wesley has been writing. Really, really sick stuff."
    Riker: "Maybe you should have Deanna talk to him."
    Crusher: "It's about Deanna!"
     
  10. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    K'Ehleyr: I've called you all here to discuss my pregnancy test. It was negative.

    <All breathe sigh of relief>

    Worf:
    ...?
     
  11. TommyR01D

    TommyR01D Commander Red Shirt

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    UK
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    Gowron: Captain, are you paying attention?

    Captain: I'm more interested in what appears to be some sort of rug covering a large hole in the briefing room ceiling.
     
  12. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Gowron: Tradition dictates that the Arbiter of Succession must lead us in a round of Frère Jacques sung in the original Klingon.

    Picard: Very well. Ready? loDnI' Qugh, loDnI' Qugh, be'nallI lom, be'nallI lom....

    Security Guard 1 <whispering to other guard>: Oh you just knew he'd know it.
     
  13. Bry_Sinclair

    Bry_Sinclair Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    The glorious Shetland Isles!
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    K'Ehleyr: I see you baby, shackin' that ass!

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    Duras: [looking after Worf, thinking] I wish I knew how to quit you.

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    Deanna and Beverly did attend the briefing, however they weren't sitting at the table...

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    Duras: What the fuck, Picard! I was told you had a hot blonde as a Security Chief! I get here and I found she didn't even survive the first season, but rather than replace her with another attractive women you opt for Worf?
    Gowron: I know, right! Since he has his Counsellor sitting next to him in a low-cut onesie or micro miniskirt, I'd have thought the old horndog would want a sexy female behind him as well.

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    Crusher: Will, look at this. I noticed something odd on the sickbay security cameras.
    Riker: What is it, Doctor?
    Crusher: Doctor Selar always leaves the room a couple of minutes before Ambassador K'Ehleyr arrives. Then a few minutes after she leaves, Selar returns.
    Riker: That is odd...

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    Troi: I believe this is a classic case of the Klingons over-compensating for other significant 'short comings'.
     
  14. Isis

    Isis Commodore Commodore

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    It was so boring out in space that particular day that Duras played "Mother, May I?" with the Enterprise crew.



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    Picard: "Nice try, but for optimal light reflection, a smooth pate is far superior to a ridged one."
     
  15. Richard III

    Richard III Ensign Red Shirt

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    No Worf, I meant a different love tunnel.


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    Riker began to hate the Starfleet weightwatcher sessions.


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    "Captains Log, supplemental. No one must ever know that the latest war with the Klingons began with me whipping them at musical chairs."


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    The Phanton Menace DVD was a hit in Sickbay.

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    Enterprise was rubbish at the Wing Flap Game.
     
  16. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Just passing through.
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    K'Ehleyr:
    For Feklar's sake Worf! Stop cropdusting!


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    Duras: Panty lines are not honorable!


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    K'Ehleyr:
    I can explain those films. I was young and needed to improve myself, to enrich myself.


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    Picard: What - no women?

    Gowron: Spin the bottle is a warrior's game!


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    Crusher: Look at this, Will - here is Wesley naked at two, and here is Wesley naked at eighteen.

    Riker: Sickbay emergency indeed, Doctor. Will you be sharing this study with the crew?

    Crusher: Share it? I'm writing a paper on it.


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    Captain's log, supplemental: The ready room debriefing went as planned. Thank goodness I keep a clean pair in there.
     
    Last edited: Feb 8, 2013
  17. Ln X

    Ln X Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

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    K'Ehleyr: Don't you leave me you spineless petaQ!

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    Duras: What is that traitor doing on your bridge Picard?
    Picard: He's here for pawnage and humiliation Duras, what else is Worf good for?
    Worf <thinking>: Bastards!

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    Picard: Far from me to interfere with the personal relationships of my crew, but you Worf and K'Ehleyr are to be kept separate or face a gruelling session of painsticks and tribbles.

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    Captain's log, supplemental: The debate over K'mpec's impotency continues...
     
  18. Ln X

    Ln X Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

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    The great gig in the sky
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    Picard's incessant blasting of Gangnam Style across the sector was soon met with a harsh response...
     
  19. Honorable Ensign

    Honorable Ensign Commander Red Shirt

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    Worf: :sigh: I see someone stole Wesley's clothes again.

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    Riker: Man, I missed a lot of fun stuff when I had that Trill, huh?
     
  20. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk The Real Me Premium Member

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    Nov 4, 2001
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    Down in the tube station at midnight
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    K'Ehleyr: Ah, Worf? Maybe we should just leave.