TNG Caption This #220: The Goddess of Empathy

Discussion in 'The Next Generation' started by LeadHead, Jul 2, 2011.

  1. LeadHead

    LeadHead Director of Comedy Premium Member

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    Happy Friday, friends and neighbors, lets see what we've got here!

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    First up to the plate, we have the "Hoes before Bros" Award goes to:

    Next, the "Slow Staff Meeting" Award goes to:


    Next, the "The More, The Merrier" Award goes to:

    Next, the "Honorable Combat" Award goes to:

    Okay, you may have noticed that I've done the winners a little out of order this time around. That's because the Keiko giving birth photo got the World's Most Awesome Responses! Pure Hilarity! I decided that I can not just leave it with one victor. Even using one of the others for a Klingon Belly Laugh Award is inadequate. So there are 3 winners here and 2 Klingon Belly Laugh Awards this week! Amazing, Just Amazing People! I salute all of you!

    First, the "Modern Medicine" Award goes to:

    Next, the "Thorough Screening" Award goes to:

    And, the "Beside Manner" Award goes to:

    Here's the Photoshop that made me really hungry! Our winner is:

    And of course the promised double KBL awards...


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    Congratulations to all of our winners and many, many thanks to all of our contestants! This was a real tough one to judge, which means it was awesome! So many great captions! Loved it! Thanks Again!

    Now, continuing our character centric contests, next crewmember: Deanna Troi. Have fun!

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    Off we go!
     
  2. LeadHead

    LeadHead Director of Comedy Premium Member

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    Troi: I'm going to kill Barclay!

    Riker: Hmmm... you used to hate that position.

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    Frakes was actually not as optimistic as reported when he got the script for TATV.

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    Crusher soon regretted volunteering to personally record all of the crew's dreams.

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    Worf: Please don't follow me all lovey dovey. We're not supposed to be in a relationship until the end of the series.

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    Picard: Don't Shoot!

    Troi: So you thought telepaths are only bad-ass in the Babylon 5 universe, did ya?
     
  3. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk The Real Me Premium Member

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    Down in the tube station at midnight
    .

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    PICARD: Would you mind not transmitting sexually suggestive thoughts to your "Imzadi" during staff meetings, Counselor?

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    CRUSHER: Relax,Deanna. Just one more stray nose hair.


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    PICARD ( thinking ): I'm touching your breast.

    TROI: I might only be a empath, but cut that the hell out now!!!!!!
     
  4. Isis

    Isis Commodore Commodore

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    Troi: "Captain, I sense you are confused. With a case of jazz hands, you need to go to Dr. Crusher, not me."
     
  5. Isis

    Isis Commodore Commodore

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    Very few could best Crusher in her ability to look grave at a patient's bedside.



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    It was a little known fact that Patrick Stewart never quite got the hang of the Vulcan salutation.
     
  6. Jonas Grumby

    Jonas Grumby Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Thanks for the win, LeadHead!

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    Riker: "You like it? I've been working on it for months! I call it 'Deanna au Naturel with Ice Cream Cone'!"


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    Admiral Pressman: "Will, is this Deanna Troi? Oh, Deanna, Will has told me so much about you! And, Will, you're nuts, buddy! There is nothing wrong with those!"


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    Picard: "Alright, okay, I may have said that to your mother, but what I meant was..."
     
  7. Finn

    Finn Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Troi: Beverly...You look like crap. Computer, activate the emergency medical hologram!
     
  8. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk The Real Me Premium Member

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    RIKER: This is my latest modification to the NX-01 holoprogram.

    GEORDI: Daaaaammmnnn.

    TROI: You really must hate Trip Tucker.

    RIKER: He knows what he did.
     
  9. Gary7

    Gary7 Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Thanks for the Photoshop selection, Leadhead. :)


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    Riker: "You like it?"
    Deanna: "That's the biggest..."
    LaForge: "... hot fudge sundae I've ever seen. Must be over 3,000 calories!"
     
    Last edited: Jul 2, 2011
  10. Gary7

    Gary7 Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Crusher: "This is just great. Just--great. So Deanna can't sleep... and I have to stay up all night blocking her damned nightmares with this friggin' tricorder."
     
  11. Gary7

    Gary7 Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Troi: "I'm sorry Captain, but I simply won't do it. You'll never get me to do 'the hokey pokey'!"


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    Picard: (acting like Al Jolson) "Mammy! What's wrong with ya, Mammy? Don't ya love me, Mammy? Tell me what ta do, Mammy!"
    Riker: "I don't think it's working... she's definitely not amused."



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    Troi: "Oh no... no, no. There's definitely nothing more to be said."
    Picard: "But counselor--"
    Troi: "I can read your minds! Dirty old perverts, the lot of you!"
    Riker: "Deanna, c'mon, can't you--"
    Troi: "And, YOU! Just because you were my Imzadi once, doesn't give you any carte blanche to even think of such things."
    Picard: (to Riker) "Will, you assured me that she's an empath, not a telepath!"
     
    Last edited: Jul 2, 2011
  12. BlobVanDam

    BlobVanDam Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

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    Geordi: Ok Deanna, I believe you now. Virtual Troi can open her mouth wider.

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    Crusher: Nope, the tricorder can't figure it out either. Betazoid, British, Greek, it can't figure out where the hell she's from.

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    Picard: It wasn't my idea, Deanna. Starfleet has a new security measure enabling the Captain to pat down any crew member without suspicion. I've seen anti-matter bombs that fit into an A cup. I've even heard a rumour that the crew of the Enterprise 1701 once made a bomb so inconspicuous, you couldn't even see it!
     
  13. Skywalker

    Skywalker Admiral Admiral

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    Woohoo, thanks for the win! :D

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    Crusher: "I'm sensing some brain activity. Oh, wait, that's the tricorder..."

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    Geordi: "What the hell am I looking at?"
    Troi: "Data's holographic reenactment of The Full Monty."
    Riker: "I like it!"

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    Picard: "Numbah One, did you realize that from this angle, it looks like I'm grabbing Counselor Troi's breast?"
    Riker: "I did indeed, sir."
    Picard: "Wonderful! We should film from this angle more often!"
     
    Last edited: Jul 2, 2011
  14. inflatabledalek

    inflatabledalek Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

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    Riker: I've missed that face you pull...


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    Riker: The curls really aren't working for you...

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    Crusher: Act damn it!

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    Worf: Would you mind just walking a little in front of me? It's all part of a noble Klingon tradition about letting ladies go first, and not about me watching your hypnotic ass swagger from side to side.

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    Picard: You know what they say about men with big hands?
     
  15. Skywalker

    Skywalker Admiral Admiral

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    Riker: "So, Deanna, how's your day been?"
    Troi: "I'm the counselor here, Will. Shouldn't I be asking you that?"
    Riker: *facepalms* "Aw, geez..."
    Troi: "I'm sensing some frustration."
    Riker: "No kidding."
     
  16. CorporalCaptain

    CorporalCaptain Admiral Admiral

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    "Who are you?"
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    Riker: Careful, Captain, she's on her annual cycle.

    Picard: Counselor Troi, we mean you no harm!
     
  17. Gary7

    Gary7 Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Lwaxana (OS): "She's Betazoid! I know, I could never figure out why she persists on doing that... well... phony accent."
     
  18. Finn

    Finn Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Crusher: I wonder if this would work with Picard. This way, he wouldn't be able to cut me off....unless a Romulan warbird decloaks off starboard like the last time.
     
  19. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk The Real Me Premium Member

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    PICARD: Scan me and get a base reading.

    CRUSHER (Raises eyebrow): You're kidding, right?
     
  20. Mojochi

    Mojochi Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    Aug 18, 2007
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    Riker: Oh yeah, I remember that move

    Laforge: I'll be in my quarters

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    Little did everyone know Deanna's telepathy with Will didn't end at the Farpoint mission, and occassionally for fun, she liked to telepathically push images of her naked mother


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    Deanna: Uhhh... Jean-Luc

    Crusher: I knew it! You bitch!

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    Deanna: Mot uses that relaxer on my hair too. Smells pretty doesn't it?

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    Picard: If I have to break up another lover's quarrel between you two, I'm seriously going to kick you both in the crotch