The greatest post you will read for a few hours

Discussion in 'Star Trek Movies: Kelvin Universe' started by Chu'lak, May 20, 2013.

  1. Chu'lak

    Chu'lak Lieutenant

    Joined:
    Apr 24, 2013
    I heartily agree with everything in this arctile

    http://www.filmschoolrejects.com/fe...d-existed-when-wrath-of-khan-hit-theaters.php

    Author’s Note:While on a survey mission, Al Gore is sucked into a giant hole in the ozone that deposits him in the past. Stranded, he uses his knowledge of the future to invent the internet decades sooner than he did in his original timeline. By the 1980s, the internet has evolved to what it became by the early 21st century, dragging fan culture with it.

    This is one such review that I obtained from our alternate past.

    Reviewed: Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan Is a Slap in the Face to Fans!

    By: GeneGeneTheRodenberryMachine

    Spock dies!

    I’m sorry. I took some heat for posting that as the headline in my earlier screening report, but the fact is that it’s impossible to discuss this movie without discussing that salient point. Let’s also get to what’s really important – Nick Meyer, Harve Bennett AND Leonard Nimoy all lied throughout production when they refused to confirm the rumors of Spock’s death. It was ridiculous, as this had to be the worst kept secret in Hollywood. Everyone knew about this beforehand, so I don’t know why some of my critical brethren are kissing Paramount’s ass by pretending we all didn’t know the ending.

    [...<snip>...]

    Maybe if they just outright marketed it as the Death of Spock, curious folks would have flocked in opening weekend before word got out about how bad this was. Instead they pushed it as run-of-the-mill sci-fi, and hardcore Trekkers will be so angry about Spock’s death that there will be no repeat business.

    Parmount, next time you need to give the reigns of the film to a REAL fan. If Bennett and Meyer get work after this, it’ll be a miracle.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: May 20, 2013
  2. BillJ

    BillJ Fleet Admiral Admiral

    You don't need a time machine. Real fans tore TWOK apart when it was released.
     
  3. M'Sharak

    M'Sharak Definitely Herbert. Maybe. Moderator

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    The article is actually pretty funny and makes some valid points besides. However, "fair use" says that you should cite only portions, providing a link to the balance of the article, rather than reproducing a copyrighted piece in its entirety. I've edited the opening post accordingly, and everyone may go read the full piece by following the link.
     
  4. Admiral Buzzkill

    Admiral Buzzkill Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    This is fucking brilliant! :lol:

    And BillJ is right, a lot of fans tore TWOK apart when it opened.

    The sad thing is that this faux review is better written, briefer and far more to the point than any of the teeth-gnashing attempts online to tear down STID have been.
     
  5. King Daniel Beyond

    King Daniel Beyond Admiral Admiral

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    That was excellent!
     
  6. The Wormhole

    The Wormhole Admiral Admiral

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    Meh. I get the joke, and the comparisons are obvious and clever. But it's just not funny. But then I am a Prime Trek loving and Abrams hating dinosaur...
     
  7. sj4iy

    sj4iy Commander Red Shirt

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    Sherlock "HOLMES", not "Homes" (unless the author is talking about a real estate developer).
     
  8. The Wormhole

    The Wormhole Admiral Admiral

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    Or more likely he deliberately misspelled it to make it look like a legitimate internet rant.
     
  9. Chu'lak

    Chu'lak Lieutenant

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    That's what I took it as. Teh Abrams HAET!
     
  10. sj4iy

    sj4iy Commander Red Shirt

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    Maybe, but I doubt it because the rest of the article is spelled correctly. Even "melodramatic". Typo.
     
  11. M'Sharak

    M'Sharak Definitely Herbert. Maybe. Moderator

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    Unless you count "Gene Rodenberry" in the sentence following, and "Checkov" a couple of paragraphs farther down. They could still be typos, or they might be a sly nudge at the sort of fan who consistently misspells certain actor and character names. (see: "Kahn"; "Jeffrey Coombs"; usw)
     
  12. sj4iy

    sj4iy Commander Red Shirt

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    Kahn seems to be a spelling that almost everyone is using. Do people really not know how to spell his name by now?
     
  13. Amasov

    Amasov Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Now all's we need is an article about if the Internet did not exist when Into Darkness hit theaters. :)
     
  14. M'Sharak

    M'Sharak Definitely Herbert. Maybe. Moderator

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    Whether don't know or don't care, the result is the same. It's not for want of correction, in any case. ;)
     
  15. Phily B

    Phily B Commodore Commodore

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    Everyone has different expectations, I remember Insurrection being well received - though I was just a kid back then, I didn't frequent ST sites all that much.
     
  16. Keeper

    Keeper Commodore Commodore

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    :lol: That was pretty good.